Well, surprise, surprise Vanderpump Rules fans: Jax Taylor did NOT cheat on Brittany Cartwright! Oh, I’m just kidding – of course he did! I mean Jax probably even did it more than once actually, because Brittany found some false eyelashes in her bathroom once and they didn’t belong to her, or Jax, or Tom Schwartz (who sometimes, when he cries, likes to feel the soft flutter of gently moistened pony lashes on his tender cheeks. It’s comforting. Like a little blanket for his Cabbage Patch Kids face).
Jax apparently cheated with – and potentially knocked up – Brittany’s friend Faith Stowers, who confessed all of this to James Kennedy. Of course – why not confess to Jax’s mortal enemy? James is levitating with glee at this trashy news. Jax vehemently denies it.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! And I’m not just referring to the holiday season. Vanderpump Rulesis back on TV and I couldn’t be happier. The first episode of Season 6 did not disappoint. Obviously the major story line is that Faith missed her period after she allegedly had sex with is Jax Taylorin front of a sleeping senior citizen that she was supposed to be taking care of, but plenty of other things happened.
I don’t blame Andy Cohen for pushing for a hookup between Shep Roseand Stassi Schroederwhile they were both guests in the Bravo clubhouse during the last Watch What Happens Live episode. They’re both Bravolebrities. They have a good amount of mutual friends. They are both very open about how much they want to be in a relationship.
Shep even has his own Southern Charm spin-off show called Relationshepwhich documents his quest for a love interest, so it makes sense that Andy brought up his love life during the interview. Probably no one is surprised by this prediction, but it does not look like Shep found “the one,” since he admitted to hooking up with Summer House cast member Jaclyn Shuman pretty recently.
Last night was the season premiere of Vanderpump Rules. SIX LONG SEASONS I will have been recapping this show, and six long seasons I will have loved every minute of it. Well, OK, not every minute, but a lot of minutes. Last night did not disappoint on this rollercoaster to hell and back. Complete with costumes! But still can the writers over there get a new story besides cheating?!
At SUR, Tom Sandovalis still slinging drinks while dreaming of a less sloppy future. A Tomtastic future with sexy TVs and pot-tinis. Yes, you heard that right: pot-tinis, as in marijuana-laced mixed drinks. That sounds like a YouTube horror story about what teens are getting into to these days.
Lisa Vanderpump is moving forward with Tom-Tom, a restaurant centered around the Toms, and for the low introductory price of $100,000 dollars, paid in installments of $9.99 per month (for life) – taxes and fees apply – the real life Toms can become 10% partners in this glorious venture. One might think old (I used that word intentionally) Tom 1 would be grateful. Instead he is besieged with angst!
The dynamics of the Vanderpump Rules cast are constantly changing. It’s hard to keep track of who everyone’s friends, enemies, and sexual partners are, but no matter what happens, they all seem to forgive each other eventually- somehow. And then the cycle of confusing friendships continues again.
Season 6 hasn’t even premiered yet, but we should all be on the lookout for some drama between Jax Taylorand Kristen Doute since Jax talked a lot of shit about her in a recent interview.
Changes are in the salty, sparkly Beverly Hills air – Eileen Davidson is out (and it doesn’t even look like she makes a cameo?), and it’s confirmed that Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave is stepping into Eileen’s tall blonde heels. The fitness coach and married mom of 2 is also the daughter of John Mellencamp, and is not at all shy about flexing her guns!