Other than fishnets on ladies of a certain age, the drama centered aroundYolanda Foster‘s Lyme Disease and Faye Resnick‘s polarizing existence. Two subjects I do not care about one bit!
Kyle and Lisa Vanderpump are throwing a burlesque party, to celebrate their joint anniversaries. Kyle and Lisa are cute together. Even when they’re bickering. Lisa withholds sugar from Kyle’s tea as punishment for Kyle springing Faye on her. Kyle teases back that Lisa is holding a grudge. Later Lisa attempts to snoop through Kyle’s phone to see if she and Faye have been talking about her, but it’s all in fun. Quite simply, Lisa doesn’t want the “orangutan” that is Faye – and Faye is very orange in hue no thanks to the most curious spray tan color ever seen. Does she ask the airbrusher to tint her “highlighter orange”? Or possibly “Orange Julius”? Whatever’s happening – that ain’t sunkisst!
The venue for the party is a speakeasy style hotel, and it’s fabulous. Even the looming presence Faye can’t tint Lisa’s excitement.
Katie Maloney is newly engaged, gainfully employed, and in a good place with her friends these days. All things ex-BFF and Vanderpump Rules star Stassi Schroeder is decidedly not! While THE RETURN OF STASSI! seems to be the Japanese horror film headline everywhere one turns on VPR these past weeks, Katie says she’s trying to focus on the more positive aspects of her life. She does admit that seeing her old friend squirm under the expert interrogation/verbal spanking Lisa Vanderpump doled out was a bit uncomfortable to watch this week. But she agreed with Lisa’s astute points, just the same!
Before Katie breaks down the Stassi Situation, she reflects on the “perfect” time she and the gang spent in Hawaii – that is, until Jax Taylor decided to play petty sunglasses thief. When she found out about Jax’s arrest, Katie admits, ” I had no words and still have a difficult time articulating how frustrating and disappointing that day was. We had all separated for mere hours and for something this catastrophic to have happened is purely mind numbing.”
But no thank you, Tom 2, for the reference to your flaccid penis. Katie Maloney, please get off Scheana Marie‘s drama train and onto your man. If the way Tom 2 was making out with that Hooters chicken wing is any indication, that was a man deprived and we know how Katie feels about make-out cheating!
The Kristen Doute Apology Tour continues on, gathering steam by adding Stassi Schroeder, and growing into a cloud of vicissitude by adding Jax.
In defense of Faye, Kyle insists everyone should just let go of the past and see Faye for the amazing and lovely woman she is today. “Faye is an easy target and always pre-judged. If people actually met her, they would be surprised,” protests Kyle. “I have always been a good judge of character and would not have had this person in my life this many years if she weren’t the person that she is.”
This week’s episode ofThe Real Housewives of Beverly Hillsdidn’t seem all that dramatic on the surface, but really, a lot went down in that short bit of time. Lisa Vanderpump is sorry but maybe not quite THAT sorry for things she said. She is speaking out tonight to defend her reasons for revealing what Mohamed Hadid sorta, kinda disclosed about Bella and Anwar’s Lyme disease diagnosis. She wishes she could take it back, but..Reality TV.
Lisa believes the topic wasn’t “off the table” since Yolanda Foster herself is the one who announced to the world that Bella and Anwar had the disease. So, that part she isn’t sorry for – all topics are fair game when you sign on for reality TV. “On the subject regarding Lyme disease, I can’t stress this enough: I believe when we initiate conversation on a reality show, whether inadvertently or not, we open the doors for discussion. I have initiated sensitive subjects myself, with regard to my children, for one… Max’s adoption, with the full understanding that as cameras were documenting this, it would be flung into a forum where many would speculate. It was a conscious choice, so people would gain a better understanding of our family dynamic.”
Kathryn says she was fine with LVP’s questions, “I wasn’t offended by Vanderpump’s asking me my age, I’m very proud to say how old I am. Why wouldn’t I be? And I am also very proud to have married my husband, regardless of our age difference. It’s never mattered to me. Age is a number…I can be curious about age differences, too, but that’s all it is. I want to understand couples and what makes them work. Maybe Vanderpump wanted to know what it was like to be with such a young, hot stud, haha…kidding Ken. I found Vanderpump’s questions engaging and funny, but I am sure others might not see it that way. I guess that those are things I would also ask and then be surprised I offended someone. And that’s all I have to say about that.”
Look – I’m just gonna say it, because it has to be said: Yolanda Foster should not be part of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills this season. If Yolanda is too ill to fully participate, she should have taken a leave of absence to selfie from the comfort of her bed.
It’s not that I believe illness or family tragedy have no place on a mostly fluffy reality show. I fully agree the storylines should be real and provide an honest-ish glimpse into these women’s lives. But Lyme Disease has infected everything! Plus Yolanda is not giving us realness (about her own life or, apparently, allegedly, her children’s?), nor is she giving us the aspirational living required from the WEALTHIEST Housewives zipcode. Instead she’s giving us… well I don’t know if it’s Chronic Lyme, misdiagnosed menopause, Munchausen by Wikipedia, denial over an ailing marriage, or silicone poisoning?