Eileen kicks off her blog, “What is this, a dinner party or the Spanish Inquisition? I don’t think I’ve shied away from discussing the details of how Vincent and I met (remember that time when Brandi threw wine in my face?), despite the fact that it really is nobody’s business. Oh and by the way, everyone has moved on! Well, almost everyone…If a friend wants to “get to know” me, I’m happy to answer anything. Lisa V.’s questions seemed far from friendly, but OK.”
Lisa kicks off her blog with a funny, “Let’s start this week’s blog with a riddle. Question: What happens when you take a handful of housewives out of Beverly Hills and put them in the Hamptons? Answer: They turn into a bunch of ridiculous, judgmental bitches. LOL!”
The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills are now holding the Hamptons hostage. Lisa Vanderpump is pissy because she’s forced to stay in a cut-rate hotel, to attend a party Farrah Abraham is crashing, to celebrate the cover of a magazine literally no one has heard of. As Bethenny Frankel said, “Is it like one of those free magazines?”
Worst of all: Lisa must pretend to be happy about this so-called honor and has dragged poor Ken along for the ride. Did Ken not look about ready to lie down under the wheels of somebody’s limo just to make the high pitched voices stop? Ken-Aged-70 isn’t over the hill, he’s over it ALL.
Still stranded at the White Party, over dinner Lisa morphs into a CIA Investigator, one step away from waterboarding Eileen Davidson with a Chanel purse and a Vodka Tonic, as she asked probing questions, carefully worded in provocative terms, about Eileen’s marriages – specifically how Eileen met Vinny and when.
Andy brings up the ignorant comment David Foster made to Lisa followingYolanda Foster‘s explant surgery: “Ken has better tits than her now… bigger.” Lisa defends David, saying, “I think David tries to make light of everything and he was just kind of throwing some levity into what has been a pretty depressing situation.”
On whether or not David and Yolanda‘s split took her by surprise, Lisa says, “I didn’t see it coming. Not at all. I was absolutely blindsided by that. There was a lot of ‘my love’ and I know it’s been challenging for sure but I’m really sad to see it because I love them together as a couple.”
Last night on Vanderpump Rules there were boobs, butts, and bad friends galore. You know, the usual!
It’s official I cannot stand Scheana Marie! Her ‘Nu-Stassi‘ routine is pathetic; she’s a totally disloyal, whiny, shit-stirring, biatch who needs to stop taking makeup tips from My Little Pony. Lord with those false eyelashes – you could practically fly with those things! In fact maybe that’s an idea – fly, fly away, Scheana. Take Kristen Doute with you.
Tom 2 and Katie Maloney are celebrating their engagement, which included burned taquitos sexytimes. Stassi Schroeder sent Katie a phony text congratulating her and whining that she wasn’t a part of it. Poor Stassi – she ditched all her friends but now is sad they don’t like her anymore. Poor Little Bitch Girl Problems!
She starts off explaining that she wasn’t mad at her co-stars for bolting from the hotel, just at their choice of communication. “It was promised to be a fun filled weekend and yes, I was a little disappointed when I arrived to be greeted with a scribbled note that they had left. Kyle notably commented that I would like to be in the house too, maybe so, but life is invariably dependent on the decisions you make in the moment and I knew for me to leave would be insulting to all who had hosted us. I wasn’t mad at them, but it would’ve been more considerate to have waited until I arrived, methinks!”