Lisa Vanderpump

Lisa Vanderpump

In her blog, Lisa Vanderpump called out Kyle Richards for all the nonsense she spewed on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills this week.

Lisa snarked, “So, here we are in the kitchen of my disco, aka Villa Rosa. Kyle comes to pick me up, we are jovial and tease each other, which is the foundation of our friendship, but I was eager to resolve the issue regarding the invitation of Faye Resnick to the barbecue at her house the week previously.”

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Kathryn Edwards

It may have been 20-plus years ago that Faye Resnick capitalized on wrote a book on the death of Nicole Simpson which mentioned Kathryn Edwards’ (and her ex-husband’s) name, but Kathryn was not done processing it all when the cameras were rolling on this season’s Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. Having only met Faye in person this year at Kyle Richards’ barbecue, Kathryn says she needed some time to get over a wound that goes deep, and she frankly doesn’t care whether Kyle understands that or not! 

The newest addition to RHOBH, Kathryn prides herself on being honest and says she’ll always “‘have the balls’ to speak the truth.” And if she’s not quite done holding a grudge against Faye, well…she’s in good company: Lisa Vanderpump is still not over Faye coming for her at her anniversary party three years ago (nor should she be, in my opinion!).  

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Yolanda Foster

Another week… another smug, self-important, and long-winded blog from Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Yolanda Foster, in which she barely even acknowledges the actual episode.

Even when Yolanda is congratulating her co-stars, she makes it all about her, “My first call out is Kyle‘s line about 20 years married in Beverly Hills being like 100! That line made me smile, because it’s true. I have not gotten there, but I can say as a hopeless romantic, it was always my intention. One thing I will carry for the next hundred years are the good memories that each experience gives us and the hard lessons that later become gifts! Congratulations to Kyle [Richards], Mauricio, Lisa [Vanderpump], and Ken!”

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Lisa-Rinna-Burlesque-Real-Housewives-Of-Beverly-Hills

Lisa Rinna seems to regret ever hearing – or repeating – the “M” word (for Munchausen!) as it concerns castmate Yolanda Foster and her chronic Lyme Disease. So after this week’s confession to Yolanda about discussing the validity of her illness behind her back, the Real Housewife of Beverly Hills star claims to feel some relief. 

Before rehashing her conversation with Yolanda, Lisa thanks her fans for their support in the wake of losing her father just weeks ago. “I’d like to start off by giving my most heartfelt thanks to everyone that sent me a message of love and condolence. Your kind words truly helped my family and me during this difficult time of my dad transitioning from our Dad and Nampa to guardian angel. I was and still continue to be humbled by all of the love you have shown us during this time. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.”

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Lisa Rinna

Last night the ladies of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills mixed trashy lingerie into their usual drama cocktail.  It was um… Splits Richards in all her glory! 

Other than fishnets on ladies of a certain age, the drama centered around Yolanda Foster‘s Lyme Disease and Faye Resnick‘s polarizing existence. Two subjects I do not care about one bit! 

Kyle and Lisa Vanderpump are throwing a burlesque party, to celebrate their joint anniversaries. Kyle and Lisa are cute together. Even when they’re bickering. Lisa withholds sugar from Kyle’s tea as punishment for Kyle springing Faye on her. Kyle teases back that Lisa is holding a grudge. Later Lisa attempts to snoop through Kyle’s phone to see if she and Faye have been talking about her, but it’s all in fun. Quite simply, Lisa doesn’t want the “orangutan” that is Faye – and Faye is very orange in hue no thanks to the most curious spray tan color ever seen. Does she ask the airbrusher to tint her “highlighter orange”? Or possibly “Orange Julius”? Whatever’s happening – that ain’t sunkisst! 

The venue for the party is a speakeasy style hotel, and it’s fabulous. Even the looming presence Faye can’t tint Lisa’s excitement. 

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Vanderpump Rules - Season 3

Katie Maloney is newly engaged, gainfully employed, and in a good place with her friends these days. All things ex-BFF and Vanderpump Rules star Stassi Schroeder is decidedly not! While THE RETURN OF STASSI! seems to be the Japanese horror film headline everywhere one turns on VPR these past weeks, Katie says she’s trying to focus on the more positive aspects of her life. She does admit that seeing her old friend squirm under the expert interrogation/verbal spanking Lisa Vanderpump doled out was a bit uncomfortable to watch this week. But she agreed with Lisa’s astute points, just the same!

Before Katie breaks down the Stassi Situation, she reflects on the “perfect” time she and the gang spent in Hawaii – that is, until Jax Taylor decided to play petty sunglasses thief. When she found out about Jax’s arrest, Katie admits, ” I had no words and still have a difficult time articulating how frustrating and disappointing that day was. We had all separated for mere hours and for something this catastrophic to have happened is purely mind numbing.”

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Stassi is sad

Last night’s episode of Vanderpump Rules confirmed what I have been saying for years (seasons in Reality TV time): Kristen Doute and Jax Taylor are soulmates. I fully anticipate that in a few years time they’ll drunkenly run off to Vegas for a midnight elopement, then have a combative, insane, marriage befitting of a Hunter S. Thompson tale. All’s Fair In Love And Liquor: A True Tale Of Krax. So thank you, Tom 2, for validating that. 

But no thank you, Tom 2, for the reference to your flaccid penis. Katie Maloney, please get off Scheana Marie‘s drama train and onto your man. If the way Tom 2 was making out with that Hooters chicken wing is any indication, that was a man deprived and we know how Katie feels about make-out cheating! 

The Kristen Doute Apology Tour continues on, gathering steam by adding Stassi Schroeder, and growing into a cloud of vicissitude by adding Jax

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Lisa Vanderpump's Closet

Jax Taylor is no stranger to bizarre drama, but getting arrested for stealing designer sunglasses during the Vanderpump Rules cast’s trip to Hawaii has pushed Lisa Vandeprump over the edge!

Lisa is strangely tolerant towards Jax’s nonsense – I can only imagine she has Xanax stashed in her BumpIt! – but even Lisa can’t believe that he was this stupid.

Jax just had the vacation of his life, why does he have to go and screw it up in the last hour?” says a shocked Lisa. “He’s always pushing boundaries, and now it has kind of bitten him in the ass.” 

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