I'm sorry. I'm not buying it. No couple is that gooey all the time (thank goodness!). Of course, along with Melissa's "happy wife, happy life" mantra, both she and Joe claim to be the most in love couple and devoted parents. I'm not saying they aren't, but do they feel as if they have to constantly shove it down our throats? Yes, I guess they do.
Last night Melissa attended a book signing at Mendham Books in New Jersey and this morning she stopped by for a chat with Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford on 'Today'.
I perused Amazon to see the initial reactions to Melissa's book and so far it hasn't been positive. In Melissa's defense, many of the 1-star reviews left for her were by people who admittedly didn't read the book or only read the free excerpt from chapter 1, and some flat out said they just didn't like her on the show.
But on the other side of that coin, of the few 5-star reviews written, those users didn't have any history of leaving product reviews except for this glowing summary of how Melissa's book changed their life. So, that's a little suspect. But again, the same is true for some of those negative reviewers. The whole thing reads a little like a blog comment section – filled with both Melissa lovers and Melissa haters and the reviews are nearly all 1's and 5's, with no in-between.
Melissa tries to convince us that bumping into Penny at dinner was a total shock, "The talk with Penny. Joe and I thought we were going out to a nice dinner. I had no idea she’d be there. We were just as surprised as you were to see her sitting at the bar." Biting.My.Tongue.
Teresa starts out explaining that Joe Gorga and Melissa need to learn the right approach to dealing with rumors when you're on TV. "Unfortunately when you're on TV, people want what you have. They want to be on TV too and they'll do anything to make it happen or they just want to take you down because they're sick of watching you. I get it. I've seen it happen now on every season of every Housewives show in every city. It's not fun to be the target, but it comes with the territory. The problem is when newer cast members join and get attacked, they can freak out like Melissa and Joey were. You have to stay united and refuse to let any strangers break you down. But I get that it's hard. It shouldn't be hard for family to believe family over strangers, but…"
So last night on Real Housewives of New Jersey the producers teased us with progress, yet again, but then we all ended up right back where we started with some sort of family drama nonsense.
Gaaawd. Gawwwwwd. Gaaaaaaaaaaaaawd. It's all sooooo boring. We don't care. And you know what, it doesn't even seem believable anymore. Ugh. That's like all I have to muster. Recap over. Bye! Just kidding, but I'm gonna go ahead and say the highlight of last night's show was Penny Drossos-Karagiorgis' 10 foot long ponytail extension from the My Little Pony Weave Collection! Seriously that synthetic tail she was sporting was the color of Kraft Mac & Cheese and looked like straight up plastic Easter grass. As RuPaul would say: 'Grrrrrrrrllllll…'
My other favorite part of the episode: Melissa Gorga's "singing". Her music career is about as believable as Penny's hair. Alright let's dive in!
So Teresa Giudice is pimping out Skinny Italian foods. She's got some sort of "store" where she has all the packages displayed. Is it edible? Apparently she's saving pasta from being boring by dumping a bunch of love in some pre-packaged rigatoni. Whatever. The real point of this meeting is so she can discuss the Melissa drama with her mom and mother-in-law. I'm not gonna snark – the mommies are adorable. They encourage Teresa to invite Joe and Melissa for a family lunch. Alls good now… for less time than it takes to boil a pot of spaghetti!
Melissa and Joe attended a McDonald's event that kicked off the start of the NFL season by launching the new "Mighty Wings". She Tweeted, "Are you watching football?!!! Have you tried @mcdonalds new #mightywings they are Delish!!! Just left their launch party!"
Other celebs pretending to eat on the red carpet: Jenny McCarthy, Adrienne Bailon, True Blood hottie Joe Manganiello, and rapper Eve.
I'm sure Teresa Giudice will be attending an event for Burger King later this week…. stay tuned!
In her Bravo blog, Caroline addresses the multiple family bonding, therapy sessions, and misguided team-building exercises. It was so much more believable when these folks weren't getting along? How much more passive aggressiveness between Melissa Gorga and Teresa Giudice can the viewing audience take? Give us (and the poor therapy horse!) a break, Bravo!
The Manzo matriarch begins by stating the obvious, writing, "The past two episodes of RHONJ were pretty intense, wouldn't you agree? As promised, the viewing audience witnessed a few very real and emotional moments from cast members that you would least expect, my husband Albert being one of them. I'm not gonna lie, that knocked me for a loop, I wasn't expecting that at all."