It's a great day for Michael Lohan!  Everyone's favorite famewhoring father of a trainwreck starlet has a new job.  He's employed!  Maybe now, he'll stop trying mooch money off poor Lindsay.  Something tells me there isn't much to mooch these days…perhaps it's why he needed to find work.

Perez Hilton shares that Michael has landed a hosting gig on a Cheaters spin-off called Celebrity Cheaters.  Let's all be honest, how much better would Kristen Stewart's cheating scandal have been had Michael Lohan been the one to bust her?  I can picture it now.   Granted, I am sure the show won't even focus on D-List celebrities.  Something tells me that Courtney Stodden and Doug Hutchison may get some screen time, though!

Congratulations, Michael.  This is certainly a subject you know a lot about!

TELL US-WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MICHAEL LOHAN'S NEW GIG?  WILL YOU WATCH? 

[Photo Credit: Twitter]

The famewhore parents-of-the-year are at it again. Michael Lohan is stamping his feet and crying foul to any media outlet who’ll listen because his ex-wife, Dina Lohan, has landed herself not one, but TWO new reality shows.

Dina is slated to star on both “Hollywood Exes” and “DramaMamas“. It’s the latter show that has Michael up in arms. The series will feature Dina and others mentoring youngsters who are hoping to make it on Broadway.

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Michael says that Dina shouldn’t be allowed to give advice or help young aspiring thespians because of how badly she screwed up with Lindsay. It’s Dina’s fault because Michael was off in jail and couldn’t be bothered with that whole fatherhood thing until Lindsay hit it big. Michael tells TMZ, “Dina destroyed our kids by lying to them and alienating them … I feel bad for her next victim!”

Michael doesn’t think that Dina has any place on the shows because she has no talent, it’s all the kids (well, mostly Lindsay). “Lindsay is the talented one. She did it on her own … Ali is doing it on her own too … her beauty … Dina did nothing.”

Love how he backpedaled there to include poor Aliana. And no mention of his sons – who play

These two never cease to amaze me. Michael is the one who has been DESPERATE for fame. He who is constantly scrapping with his girlfriends and winding up in jail and on Celebrity Rehab, etc. Also, wasn’t there some celebrity dads show he and Jon Gosselin tried to pitch a few years back? I can’t keep all the famewhoring straight. At least Dina isn’t doing outrageous things all in the name of notoriety.

You know what I’d love? A Lohan reality show – and not that Living Lohan crap they tried to feed us back in ’08. I want the REAL, uncut crazy. These people are the epitome of dysfunctional. Dina with her denial over her family’s issues and reminiscing about her days as a Rockette and living vicariously through Lindsay. Lindsay and well, just everything about her crazy, can’t-go-five-minutes-without-an-incident life. Michael and his pathetic attempts to open a rehab center and a nightclub all in the same month. Wait, even better yet…let’s make Dina a Bravo Housewife!! I’m starting my petition to Bravo right now.

Dear Ali, all I want for Christmas is for you to write a tell-all book.

TELL US – DO EITHER OF LINDSAY LOHAN’S PARENTS BELONG ON TELEVISION?

So it seems that since being fired let go by Bravo, from the Real Housewives of New Jersey, Danielle Staub has, yet, to move on to bigger and better!

First, she appeared on VH1′s Famous Food, which turned out to be a flop, and now she is peddling her voice out to her fans for $18 a minute!

Yes, Danielle joins a slew of other Z-list celebs such as Michael Lohan, Tila Tequila, Nadya Suleman, and Angelina Pivarnick at Dial-A-Star.com which promises, “Dial-A-Star.com is the only place you can talk directly to a TRUE celebrity! Our service is unique an offers a completely discreet one on one conversation with celebs. The service is completely private and anonymous.”

Rumor Fix was the first to break the news and below are the rates for the other “stars” -

• Lindsay Lohan’s mom, Dina Lohan – $10
• Lindsay Lohan’s dad, Michael Lohan – $10
• Jersey Shore’s Angelina Pivarnick – $10
• Octomom Nadya Suleman – $15
• Former Charlie Sheen porn star Capri Anderson – $10

Another fun fact? Dial-A-Star just happens to be owned Gina Rodriguez - a former porn star! Some are now wondering what type of convos are actually taking place during these calls. A screenshot of Danielle and other celebs on the site is below.

Danielle is, however, proud and excited about her new gig as she tweeted this morning: “I’m signing in at 8am to take your calls. Its been great adding voices to the faces of so many who’ve called! 1-888-695-4543 Ext: 106474.” Hey, a girl’s gotta earn her money somehow!

Moving on to Teresa Giudice, who continues to be very subdued on Celebrity Apprentice, almost to the point that you forget she’s even on the show! However, it is Teresa’s snafu in the boardroom last night that has people talking.

See, while in the boardroom, Teresa was called “slow” by her teammate Patricia Velasquez, who considered her the weakest link on the women’s team. Teresa of course spoke up to defend herself and, well let’s just say, she ended up proving Patricia’s point in the process!

Teresa stated: “A writer? I could be a writer. I just finished my third book. I have a ghostwriter. So I could get my writing done, no problem.” Wowzers.

Teresa took to her twitter page last night to defend herself in a series of tweets. She wrote -

“You gonna knock me down, I’m gonna knock you right back down!”

“Meant to say CO-writer not ghostwriter, I just got all caught up in the moment. I have a co-writer for my books. Her name’s right on them.”

“I’ve never hidden that I have a co-writer for my books. I’m not a professional writer. I’m a cook! Why wouldn’t I work w/ a pro?”

“I was just trying to say I could get writing help from pros too– just like everyone else in that room was. #CreativeLiars.”

Finally, it seems we are much closer to the Real Housewives of New Jersey season 4 premiere than we thought. According to a tweet by Melissa Gorga, the next season of the RHONJ will debut next month on Bravo!

In looking at Melissa’s twitter page today, it appears the tweet has since been deleted. Perhaps Bravo asked her to, as they want to make the announcement themselves. Melissa made the original tweet over the weekend.

Should be a great season, as we will get to see the rift developing between Teresa and pretty much everyone else on the show.

[Photos Credit: WENN]

TELL US – THOUGHTS ON DANIELLE’S NEW LINE OF WORK? WOULD YOU PAY $18 TO TALK TO HER? WHAT DID YOU MAKE OF TERESA’S “GHOST WRITER” COMMENT? EXCITED ABOUT THE NEW RHONJ SEASON?

In light of all the real-time drama of the past few days, I felt very sad watching last night’s episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey. Teresa, Kathy, The Joes, and Melissa all made-up and seemed to be working positively towards the future, but current drama lets us know it doesn’t last!

These women have sold their integrity and self-respect, and in the process destroyed their families and friendships for a small piece of fame and little bit of extra money. I hope it was worth it. And when no one remembers who they are, except for the fleeting memories of how they once appeared on our TV screens to embarrass themselves for amusement and some designer shoes; I hope the little bit of extra money they earned is at least enough to pay for their kids’ therapy. Lord knows, they’ll need it!

Full disclosure: I don’t believe Teresa set Melissa up. 1) I don’t believe she’s capable of masterminding something that involved. Or keeping it a secret long enough for it to pan out. 2) She seems to really love her brother. I do believe she wants a relationship with him at all costs. As to what happened, I suppose maybe time will tell, and maybe not.

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The episode begins at the tail end of the Kathy and Teresa fight about who is a worse mother, Teresa or … no one. Richie decides to be the bigger man and go talk to Joe Giudice. Joe admits Teresa is “hot-headed” and get’s riled up over nothing. Joe and Richie are completely fine two seconds later and having a normal conversation, as if their wives didn’t practically come to blows a few minutes earlier. Aaahhh… men. They’re kind of refreshing that way, they just snap at each other and move on.

Jacqueline and Chris decide to take a walk and escape the drama cesspool. They are very cute and lovey-dovey together. Jacqueline expresses her frustrations about dealing with Teresa’s family drama and doesn’t want to get involved. Chris agrees that she shouldn’t. After their heart-to-heart, Jacqueline gives him a piggy-back ride and he holds onto her boobs for stability.

The Manzo spawn and their Greggy go Guidice hunting. These full-grown adult men, who act like toddlers, hide outside the bathroom window waiting for Joe in the hopes of over-hearing something, I suppose? To be honest, I sort of tuned it out. Then they spy on Teresa through the bathroom window and wonder if she is pooping. Perhaps if they had jobs to occupy their time they wouldn’t be so wrapped up in houseWIVES drama. Perhaps…

Teresa changes swimsuits for dinner and is now wearing gold. Yes, that’s all. She dipped her boobs and crotch in 14k gold-plate and tied a curtain around her shoulders. Then she starts spinning around gleefully yelling: “I’m a goddess!” It’s straight out of a vintage Summer’s Eve douche commercial – which is ironic considering she is surrounded by douches in the form of her husband, the Manzo spawn, and Greggy. Then her husband actually calls her a “crazy bitch.” How charming. So charming in fact, he allegedly has TWO women that want him. Gross.

Jacs comes over to see how Teresa is doing following the argument with Kathy. Teresa wants to act like nothing happened, which is the problem according to Jacqueline. As Teresa approaches the dinner area she ignores Kathy and goes about her business. Kathy thinks Teresa is doing it on purpose and the Wakiles decide to go back to the hotel after dinner.

The rest of the gang go out to a bar, get wasted, see which incredibly short man is less short, pull their penises out, and get into a bar fight. Wait… a bar fight … yeah Bravo never aired it! After a fun evening, Teresa and Joe G-to-the-Orga make-up and hug and seem to in a great place. Shockingly Joe G-to-the-Iudice and Joe are also having fun together, and Giudice admits at the end of the day they’re family and he only hates Gorga sometimes. It was genuine and cute. I wish these family members got along, because I enjoy watching them have fun and hang out – not punch each other at christenings. How fun was the group hug?! Be fun, Jerseies!

The next morning, after a long hiatus from Teresa, The Caroline feels better, but warns us if Teresa doesn’t relax she will be having a lot of headaches. More headaches would be good, Caroline – go ahead with that – the less we see of you with poop in your pants, not having any fun, the better!

Melissa and Joe are doing something in the shower that should not be on TV. Meanwhile the Manzo boys, who seriously have an issue with spying on people in bathrooms that I am pretty sure is illegal in the good ol’ USA, barge into their hotel room and interrupt some husband and wife bonding. And of course, Joe Gorga had to show off the goods by offering us a teeny weeny peenie sighting. The only comment I have is: Joe Gorga wears a bandana in the shower?

Teresa and the ladies are off to the market, but The Caroline is confused about why Teresa is dressed for Malibu Barbie’s prom in a stripper ballgown. Oh, is stripper a bad word in this bunch? Whoops! Teresa reveals the shopping will actually be at a local outdoor market, because she is doing research for her Italian-Italian Fusion cookbook. Kathy wishes they were doing something with clubs instead, but she wouldn’t hit Teresa – not at all. Ok, was anyone else having a total Serial Mom moment during her confessional?

In the cars the respective, camps discuss the argument between Kathy and Teresa. Teresa insists she is over it, but Caroline informs her that she is not. Kathy and Melissa, after commenting on poverty from their Escalade limo, just don’t understand how Teresa can be so dumb. Join the club, ladies!

At the market, there are lots of dead carcasses, including one labeled: “Teresa’s Relationship With Her Family and Friends.” Teresa chases Jacqueline down the street with a raw chicken and Melissa has a nightmare when she gets blood on her Gucci’s. Teresa attempts to communicate about spices with the shopkeeper, and then resorts to yelling: “Does anybody speak English?” Nope, no one including, Teresa speaks English. Nor have they heard of her cookbook, Skinny Italian. Which was on the NYT Bestseller list, in case you didn’t know, and that makes her the authority on all things cooking.

While the ladies (and Greggy, who went along to protect his Kathy) explored Dominican culinary arts; the men go golfing, and by golfing I mean show off what a$$es they are – literally. Joe Giudice in a tanktop – put it away, drunkard.

Back at the hotel, Albie, Chris, and Greggy are talking the launch of BLK water over pre-dinner drinks. Albie is trying to sound like he has a real job and is a serious businessman instead of a law school drop-out, by expressing concern over being on vacation six days before a major event. Chris isn’t worried – drinks, anyone?

On the way into the restaurant, a strangely affectionate Joe Giudice kisses his wife and her bubbies. Getting along with people does wonders for his disposition. Kathy is still (yes, still) upset about her issue with Teresa. I guess she didn’t inherit the Gorga gene of freaking out and then forgetting about it 5 minutes later.

The Manzo spawn decide now is the perfect time to ruin a wonderful evening, by suggesting an impromptu Punta Princess Pagent. Jacqueline is annoyed that they are encouraging the competition between Melissa and Teresa. Teresa looks upset preemptively, as if she is expecting everyone to either vote Melissa the winner hands-down or take the opportunity to rag on her some more. Juicy, who is being very sweet, declares she is his Punta Princess no matter what.

Luckily the pageant is all in fun, and all the ladies get some props and then in the category of intellect, no one in this bunch can remember the VP of the United States. Seriously! Melissa votes for Dick Cheney, and wins for being the closest! She also gets a point for announcing that Egypt is in Antarctica. Richie was right – intellect is not a good category for this group.

On the final day of the trip, Teresa’s lost jewelry bag arrives and she is overjoyed! Finally her precious jewels have been returned to her. Kathy wonders if the plane ride home would be a good time to discuss her argument with Teresa, but Richie talks her out of it citing that Teresa’s screeching may cause the pilot to crash the plane! Melissa quips that now that Teresa and Joey are on good terms, she’s not really all that concerned with Kathy’s relationship with her cousin.

Besides – she has bigger things to worry about, like her big singing debut at the BLK Water launch! Especially since she can’t really sing … or dance.

When Melissa and her groupies (aka her sisters) tour the performance venue, she is a little disappointed to be starting her career in some rinky-dink club instead of Madison Square Gardens. And takes it out on the poor club event planners by being sort of snippy about all her demands. She’s a big star, you guys. Like, huge! So huge, her husband is planning to rent tigers to chain to the stage during her performance. Because not only is she a big star (huge), she’s also a tiger – her song says so! Was she seriously trying to make herself look as stupid as Teresa with unprofessional comments like that?

Melissa meets with her choreographer and the back-up dancers, who look disgusted to be dealing with such an amateur. Melissa is acting bitchy and unprofessional during rehearsal, and for an ex-stripper, she has no rhythm. Maybe that’s why she only worked there a few weeks!

At the club rehearsal – yikes… girl needs the AutoTune. Albie is scared about the launch after hearing Melissa live – well, perhaps that was your first poor business decision, Albie – hiring a musical act you’ve never heard! Melissa is over practice and needs to get to hair and make-up, much to dismay of her hubs, who thinks practicing is more important than hair.

At the launch, Chris Laurita is happy about the turn-out and impressed. It is Kathy’s first time seeing Teresa since Punta Cana and she believes Teresa thinks she won the battle, but wants her to know if you alienate people you lose. Caroline LOOKED TERRIBLE.

Teresa and Jacqueline talk about Ashley. Jacqueline, admits she keeps her mouth shut to avoid arguments. Backstage, Melissa is calling her performance half-assed and lamenting that you have to start somewhere. Before the show, she gets down on her knees and thanks Jesus and her father for the opportunity, while wearing her leather cat suit.

On stage, she was definitely lip-syncing, but the performance was pretty good with the addition of digital enhancements. Joe Gorga is very proud of her for pursuing her dreams. Also very sweet, was Juicy’s gracious and kind toast congratulating her! It was so nice! It was like the magnanimous old Joe and T had been returned to us from Season 1! Teresa and Melissa hug; hoping for a fresh start! Even Teresa’s little joke about Melissa’s cleavage being “On Display”, seemed like friendly teasing instead of a jab.

In the spirit of togetherness, Teresa apologizes to Kathy for the argument in Punta Cana as Rosie watches on to make sure no shenanigans occur! Kathy tells Teresa she is proud of her cookbook for bringing their family recipes to the world and acknowledges the problems have not been all Teresa’s fault. Teresa says she doesn’t want to hold grudges any more and everyone hugs – even Teresa and Richie! Oh, so sad that that’s not where things end!

Next week: Season Finale (finally!) Ashley gets tattoo, Richie threatens to break some sensitive areas, Caroline is back on the radio. The Gorgas take a family photo. And Teresa insults Caroline in her new book – and the root of the feud is emerging! Juicy (in the non-Joe, way of course)!

Watch What Happens Live: The Guests are Caroline and Simon Helberg from Big Bang Theory. The Drinking Game word is: Bang. Andy shows a clip of Teresa’s swimsuit modeling in Punta Cana and announces today will be the last day he airs the G to the Eeya modeling clip. *tear.

Simon is against Teresa in the feud. Viewers want to know what is going on with Jacs, Tre, and Melissa after last week’s Posche fashion show, but Caroline isn’t giving any information away! Oh and Jacs is fine. Andy probably forced Caroline to say that. Caroline reveals she saw Kim G and she thinks, Michael Lohan in the parking lot when she was getting coffee, but hasn’t seen Danielle!

Caroline also blames past-season’s Albie’s thinner hair on Adderall, but now that he is not taking the drug his hair is thicker. Hair plugs (ahem…) Caroline also refuses to reveal the current status of her relationship with Teresa, but calls the reunion “epic”. Simon plays Marry, Shag, Kill with the Jersey housewives and wants to marry Caroline, hate pound Teresa, no word on who’d he would off.

The game is Jersey’s Big Bang Query. Caroline is asked if she would rather bang Chris Christie or Jersey’s former governor, but she pleads the fifth because she doesn’t want to get in trouble… because of the drama with her hubby? She is a boring guest.

The poll Question: What Did you Think of Melissa’s Performance? Awful or Awesome? Melissa’s performance gets an Awesome… barely! Only 52%! Ooohh…not looking good for your future pop star status!

Next week’s guests will be Joe and Melissa Gorga oh and Jay Mohr! Again, Juicy (in a non-Joe way)!

Thoughts on the episode? Was it difficult for you to watch considering all the recent drama? Are you sad that the Gorgas and Giudices have not made up after seeing how much fun they all have together? Did Caroline annoy you on WWHL or was that just me?

In what can only be compared to a good bad telenovela, TMZ is now reporting Tareq Salahi plans to divorce his cheating wife Michaele Salahi.

Just days after the former Real Housewives of DC star reported his wife missing and kidnapped, only to be told she had run off with Journey guitarist Neal Schon, Tareq has had it up to here with his humiliation and is taking steps to file for divorce.

Tareq is reportedly telling friends he can never trust Michaele again and will never take her back. He apparently believes she’ll eventually get tired of Neal and try to come back to him. TMZ adds that Tareq has already changed the locks on the home he shares with Michaele and the winery.

And it gets even better folks as TMZ also posted a video (the video is below) that shows a very clueless Tareq cheering on his wife as she plants a kiss on Neal. The video was shot just weeks ago during labor day weekend when Journey was in Virginia for a show.

As reported yesterday, Michaele and Neal have been carrying on with a 2-year affair. The Salahis’ presence at the concert was no accident as Michaele had been keeping in touch with Neal days leading up to the show. He even sent her the following text days before the concert: “I will be there on the 4th for a make-up date. Solo!!!! Can u?”

Fast forward to today and Tareq is mending his broken heart with the help of non-famewhore Michael Lohan! Aka Lindsay Lohan’s daddy.

By complete and total chance, TMZ caught up with Tareq and Michael as they ate dinner in Washington, D.C. Thursday night. Tareq reiterated that he felt “betrayed,” by Neal, who he considered a good friend. As for Michael, he assured us that his friendship is “the real deal.” You know, as long as there’s TMZ cameras around!

Michael and Tareq have a history dating back to Michaele’s very brief time on Celebrity Rehab.

Photo credit: INFphoto.com.

TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THE LATEST? ARE YOU OVER THIS SOAP OPERA?

UPDATE – TMZ is now reporting Tareq Salahi has officially filed for divorce citing adultery and abandonment. In the divorce docs, Tareq claims Neal sent him a picture of his penis, perhaps to taunt him. The doc reads: “the paramour [Neal] sent to my email account … a email with an attachment of a penis” — presumably his.”  Tareq reveals he has a prenup with Michaele and blames the band Journey, claiming they have been paying for Michaele’s travel accommodations and other expenses.

According to a new report, Celebrity Rehab is going on an indefinite hiatus.

RadarOnline states that while the sixth season featuring Michael Lohan, Amy Fisher, and Bai Ling is currently airing on VH1, any new season following that is up in the air.

The reason? Dr. Drew Pinsky no longer has time to do the show. “The decision was made to put the show on hiatus because Dr. Drew Pinsky is just too busy to continue to do the show,” reveals a source connected to the show.

“Dr. Drew can be seen nightly on HLN’s Dr. Drew Show, and this fall, he has another television project he is going to be involved with, Life Changers, which is a Telepictures show,” the source states adding that the amount of time it takes Dr. Drew to do ‘Rehab’ is a “tremendous” amount of time.

The source also reveals that Dr. Drew is hoping this hiatus is temporary. He would “absolutely love to revisit doing the show again in the future when he has the time. Dr. Drew really enjoyed doing the show, even though it could be very emotionally grueling at times.”

Perhaps this could also be related to recent Celebrity Rehab headlines as two of the show’s alums, Jeff Conaway and Mike Starr, passed away this year. Mike died of a drug overdose while Jeff passed away due to complications related to prescription drug use.

TELL US – THOUGHTS ON CELEBRITY REHAB GOING ON HIATUS? PLUS THOUGHTS ON THIS SEASON SO FAR?

It’s early in the day, you’ve probably just had your breakfast, so apologizes in advance for this story.

It seems Real Housewives of New Jersey extra Kim Granatell and professional famewhore Michael Lohan need some publicity… desperately. If not, what else would explain the above photo of the two randomly making out?

So what gives? Well, according to Tom Murro of Celebritymagnet.com, the photo was taken Wednesday at a bar in NYC following the taping of a new show they are doing together .

As for Kim, who will reportedly appear on season 3 of the NJ Housewives, she describes Micheal as “a good kisser” adding that “he just needs to ditch the cigarettes.”

When asked what attracted her to Michael the most, Kim replied, “I liked that he didn’t have a saggy ass, he has a nice smile, killer eyes and he’s devious like me!” Oy.

TELL US – THOUGHTS?

A week after crashing Celebrity Rehab and getting kicked off for not having an addiction, Michaele Salahi’s mom is now defending her daughter, comparing this latest fiasco to the infamous White House incident.

“It’s something you’re invited to go to, then you’re thrown out!” Rosemary Holt tells RadarOnline. “She never said she had an addiction,” adds Rosemary.

“I know the whole story from the time she left here and the paperwork she’d done and the contracts. She was asked to come on, it wasn’t her choice to come on. She was asked to,” says Rosemary, going on to insinuate that there were other reasons the show asked Michaele to come on. “She was brought on, she was told to talk about her feelings, how she survived the White House, her feelings, how she dealt with Bravo and when she went before Congress…,” she says. “That’s what she was brought on for. Then all of a sudden she’s there…the things I heard why she was there…I said ‘you don’t belong there.”

It’s not over yet as Rosemary goes on to ponder how the show could just kick her daughter off. “They signed a contract with my daughter, but yet they can put her out?! Explain that to me. But Missy has to remain with her confidentiality. It should work both ways.”

Allrighty. In other news, RadarOnline also reports that all hell broke loose on the set of Celebrity Rehab over the weekend courtesy of cast member Michael Lohan.

Apparently, it was ‘family day’ and professional famewhore Michael wanted daughter Lindsay Lohan, his youngest daughter “Ali, and the rest of the family to come for ‘family day.’ Michael even wanted Dina to come. They all refused, they don’t want to appear on camera in that setting, period. Michael was very upset and emotions were very raw for him. Soon, thereafter, all hell started to break out between other patients and families,” a show insider reveals, adding that viewers will be in for “quite a shock when it airs.”

Celebrity Rehab 5 is set to premiere sometime in May on VH1.

And as for the ABC 20/20 special about reality television that was scheduled to air this past Friday, it didn’t air as it got bumped for coverage of the Japanese earthquake and tsunami disaster. As of the moment, ABC has yet to announce a new airing date for the special titled “The Phenomenon of Reality Television.” The show was supposed to feature interviews with Michaele, Bethenny Frankel, Kyle Richards and others.

Sad news to report today as TMZ confirms rocker and Celebrity Rehab alum Mike Starr has passed away.

Cops reveal to TMZ that Mike, former Alice in Chains bassist, was found dead in a Salt Lake City home in Utah on Tuesday afternoon.

While there are no reports on Mike’s cause of death at the moment, he was arrested last month for felony possession of a controlled substance. The cops stated he had 6 Xanax pills and 6 Opana (painkiller) pills when he was arrested.

Mike appeared on the third season of Celebrity Rehab back in 2009. He was 44 years old. RIP Mike.

In other Celeb Rehab news, TMZ is also confirming that Real Housewives of DC star Michaele Salahi has been kicked off the show.

The reason? Michaele had “no addiction.” Sources tell TMZ she had “no reason to be there.” In fact Michaele’s husband Tareq Salahi told TMZ over the weekend that Michaele’s only addiction was “probably to chocolate.”

Oh, but it gets even better. Sources tell RadarOnline that Dr. Drew Pinsky tested Michaele for multiple sclerosis, something she claimed to have, and she tested negative, just as many had suspected.

“Dr. Drew did a thorough medical examination of her, including a full neurological check-up, and she is fine. Michaele is all drama, that is her main issue,” said a source to Radar.

Meanwhile, there is now some drama involving Famewhore Jr. Tareq and Famewhore Sr. Michael Lohan. Evidently, Michael, who is also on Celebrity Rehab, was renting out his LA apartment to Tareq for 3 weeks at a rate of $2,500. However, when Tareq failed to pay the money promptly, Michael left the Pasadena Recovery Center, with cameras in tow, to confront Tareq at the apartment. Michael has reportedly evicted Tareq.

TMZ is also reporting that Michael is planning to bring the Celebrity Rehab cameras along for his daughter Lindsay Lohan’s next court date, which is apparently making Lindsay and the rest of the family furious. Lindsay is now trying to prevent the cameras from the courtroom.

UPDATE #1 – VH1 has released this official statement explaining why Michaele was sent packing.

“The treatment program that Celebrity Rehab documents is intended for individuals with serious substance abuse and addiction issues. Prior to the taping of the current season, producers were advised that Michaele Salahi met the criteria to be treated in this setting. However, professional assessments spanning from that time to the present, found that she did not meet such criteria. As a result, she is no longer participating in the program.”

UPDATE #2 – Tareq Salahi is now telling TMZ he might be suing Celebrity Rehab for illegally firing his wife because of her “health condition.”  Tareq and his lawyers issued a statement saying, “[Michaele] was fired due to her health condition which is a violation of the Americans with Disabilities Act.”  As reported above, tests performed on Michaele showed zero medical conditions including no signs of MS.

They simply refuse to disappear.

Weeks after they reportedly crashed a Suberbowl suite at the Dallas Cowboys Stadium, TMZ is now reporting that the gruesome twosome known as Tareq and Michaele Salahi have signed up for Celebrity Rehab.

Yes, sources connected to the show confirm to TMZ that the Salahis, stars of the Real Housewives of DC, alongside some others have signed on for Celebrity Rehab season 5.

Other “celebs” joining the Salahis? Michael Lohan – daddy to troubled actress Lindsay Lohan, Bai Ling – Z list actress, Jeremy Jackson – former Baywatch actor, and Dwight “Doc” Gooden – former pitcher for the NY Mets.

A new report by TMZ also reveals that Lindsay Lohan is livid that her embarrassment of a father has signed up to do the show.

Lindsay was reportedly “shocked and upset” to hear the news, telling friends she’s worried he’ll embarrass the family. Sources add that Lindsay is most upset that her dad, Michael, began taping the show without giving her a heads up. She is also adamant she will NEVER make an appearance on the show.

As for the Salahis, no word yet on their supposed addiction. Michaele did reveal a while back that she had multiple sclerosis, so feel free to try to determine which drug or alcohol goes best with the BS MS.

TELL US – THOUGHTS ON THE SALAHIS DOING CELEBRITY REHAB? DO YOU CALL BS?

UPDATE: VH1 has confirmed the cast today and Tareq will not be a part of the show though Michaele will be. Below is part of the official press release -

“This season will follow Michael Lohan (celebrity dad), Michaele Salahi (The Real Housewives of DC), Amy Fisher (“Long Island Lolita”), Bai Ling (The Crow) and Jeremy Jackson (Baywatch) on their quest for sobriety. Celebrity Rehab with Dr. Drew is slated to premiere early summer on VH1.”

While Michaele is the one actually doing the rehab, it is safe to assume Tareq will crash the show at some point during the season to help support his wife‘s fame addiction.