Coming off my post-Christmas slump to deal with Real Housewives Of Atlanta makes me a bit cranky. Now I don’t know about y’all but I really don’t care if Phaedra Parks owes Todd Tucker money. I’d rather talk about Kandi Burruss rocking the h-e-double-hockeysticks out of over-the-knee sequined boots at 6 months pregnant. And I’d also like to discuss Kenya Moore‘s latest fake-a-date.
Kenya and Marlo Hampton hit the gym because this is totally 2000 and that’s where you meet men. Or cows. But not poopers. They’re playing with balls when James walks over to flirt with Kenya. James checks some of Kenya’s boxes: Tall, handsome, fit – but he’s too young and is but a mere personal trainer. They have a totally awkward, phony flirtation that results in a date. I was distracted by James smiling with his lip over his teeth and was waiting for them to expose scary teeth. But they weren’t scary at all.
Later Kenya and James meet to play basketball. Kenya wears a baby blue outfit to send subliminal hints that say, “Sperm donor.” Kenya isn’t sure if she wants a second date with James because he’s too young (and seriously this date was more awkward than one of those stupid male model photoshoots they always force uponAmerica’s Next Top Model contestants), but she’d totally turkey baste him in an alley, y’all!
I hope our Reality Tea family is enjoying a wonderful holiday week, with full bellies, fuller hearts, and a snarky outlook for what reality shows have in store for us in 2016! Real Housewives of Atlanta has had a crazy season thus far, and it can only get more insane after the most recent installment. Proving that no housewives can take a vacation without horrific drama, the RHOA ladies getaway to Miami was anything but fun, restful, or relaxing. In fact, it was downright hard to watch thanks to Tammy McCall Browning’s nephew Glen losing his shiz and slamming his aunt to the ground while trying to get to Kenya Moore after she told him to leave. Tugging on a wig is one thing, but battery is anything but entertaining. Take note, Bravo!
In her Bravo blog, Kenya espouses on the week’s episode with her own headlines, just in case you didn’t catch her theme. She begins, “MESSY–Many people accuse me of being messy. If you say something on a reality TV show with cameras recording you that you don’t want people to know about or ever repeat, don’t go on a reality TV show talking about people… Now that’s messy! You can call me messy, and at times I am. I own that. However, what I won’t do is look the other way when I see a potentially dangerous situation for myself, my friends, and cast mates.”
There’s nothing a reality star loves more than an instagram feed to get a little attention outside of their regularly scheduled TV show.
Below is Reality Tea’s list of the most outrageous, interesting, exciting, scandalous, fun, or just plain bizarre selfies and instagram photos of 2015. From Farrah Abraham‘s plastic surgery mishap, to the wildest moments, and of course about 2 million bikini pics!
Above, bizarro world’s collide when Luann de Lesseps partied with former President Bill Clinton. “What a thrill and honor to meet the wonderful #presidentbillclinton last night at Birthday Party for @hillaryclinton,” the Real Housewives Of New York star shared. I guess we know who’s getting the Countess’ vote!
Below, are some of our favorite selfies and instagram moments from 2015. Enjoy!
Phaedra Parks isn’t afraid of putting self-proclaimed new queen of delusion bee Kenya Moore on blast, and she spent some time in her blog this week doing just that! Right or wrong, Phaedra is still convinced that Kenya’s “fears and poor communication skills” turned a sticky situation into an all-out brawl in Miami. The Real Housewives of Atlanta lawyer also discusses her thoughts on the plight of black men – and specifically black youth – in this country, and why the Miami incident sparked conversation about deeper issues.
Phaedra reflects on the Miami scene: “Everything happened very fast. One moment we were all having fun and in a split second things took a disastrous turn. Initially, I was shocked and stunned, but when I saw Tammy [McCall-Browning] on the ground, I sprung into EMT mode and went to help her. I took her pulse, checked her breathing, and determined she did not need CPR, so I just stayed by her side until the ambulance arrived. It could have been much worse.”
Honestly I don’t know what to say about last night’s Real Housewives Of Atlanta. Sorry this is late by the way – I was re-playing the ‘Glen Gets Slammed Into The Wall’ scene on repeat until dawn.
Somewhere Glen Rice Jr. turned to the very dark side. Either he’s a drunk, rude, out of control jerk; or he’s a rude, out of control jerk, but alcohol (+ Kenya Moore?) made things worse!
I think we can ALL agree we’re not getting the whole story from Bravo. Based on the women’s reactions, Glen’s 0-60 psychosis, plus the 3 mobile refrigerator units that appeared out of nowhere to practice their sumo skills on Glen and living room wall, I’d say some serious SERIOUS information got lost on the editing floor. Right next to Porsha Williams‘ couth, dignity, and trophy wife status! (Did she REALLY admit to a golden shower on television last night? Really?!)
Our favorite reality TV stars cannot get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to social media to share even more of their lives with us. And we would not have it any other way. Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite snapshots and selfies from this week. Enjoy.
With the addition of Kim Fields to the Real Housewives of Atlanta cast this season, we’ve seen mixed reactions from fans. Some think she’s way too normal and low-key for this crazy show and others argue that it’s laid-back style that makes her a great addition and a bit of a breath of fresh air – a voice of reason. Also split on their feelings over Kim joining the cast are co-stars Phaedra Parks and Kenya Moore. The ladies took to their Bravo blogs this week with very different opinions on what Kim is bringing the show this season.
Phaedra enjoys that Kim brings a different perspective since she’s the newbie. On Kim calling out ‘instigation vs. information’ in regard to Kenya’s sometimes shady way of stirring the pot, Phaedra shared, “My grandmother always said, “A new broom sweeps cleaner!” I thought Kim’s observation was very intuitive. Since she is new to our circle, she brings a different perspective that is refreshing; most of us have been dealing with this adolescent style behavior for some time and we are numb to it. Kim reminds us that people usually don’t do and say a lot of things we see and hear amongst our circle, so it’s nice to have someone there who is so grounded.”
Of her comment that information is not the same as instigation,Kim claims, “I’m not a ‘call out’ type of woman. It was an observation of the way things were going down at dinner.” But will Kenya-Don’t-Come-For-Me-Unless-Twirl-For-You take Kim’s commentary in stride? Something tells me: Nah.