The ladies of Real Housewives of Atlanta did what they do best last night – put on some high, high heels and trash each other's relationships. Kenya Moore is slaying marriages left and right because her job is apparently The Divorce Whisperer. She needs to focus on her own fantasy man because the so-called oil tycoon, well I think he's pumping gas at the Sheetz after she paid his coming to America salary.
Things begin with Cynthia Bailey and Peter celebrating their three-year anniversary. Has it really been three years since Cynthia was nearly kidnapped to prevent her from walking down the aisle wearing a duct tape and hefty bag wedding gown? Time flies when you're being crazy!
Cynthia's friend Natalie and her husband Christopher show up to talk about how Cynthia and Peter are not having sex. Natalie reveals that she knows Kandi Burruss' fiance Todd. And apparently Todd is quite the hustler who was known for trying to date up – or put himself in positions to reap the benefits of his associations. "Basically Todd's an opportunist?" Cynthia asks. I wonder if Natalie has been talking to Mama Joyce?
Phaedra Parks is still reeling over Chuck-gate. Lest you forget he accused her of being a member of the Big Homie Team. As it turns out the only thing big about Chuck is his forehead and his ego. He's actually more like a little homie, or as Phaedra tells Kandi Burruss: "bitesized brownies and a cocktail sausage." Ouch.
Kandi is shocked that Chuck would classify their relationship so falsely, I'm shocked her chunky little dog is eating Pringles. Seriously – what adult purchases Pringles? Phaedra wonders if Kandi's dog needs a Colt 45 to go with his "ghetto" snack. She also calls Chuck a pig. Because he is one.
Our favorite reality TV stars cannot get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to Twitter to share even more of their daily lives with us. And we love them for it! Here's a roundup of some of our favorite photos from the Twitterverse this week! Enjoy!
Kandi called out Chuck's revisionist history (or straight up lies) and explains that being on Chuck's team, was um… no big thing.
First Kandiwrote on Facebook, "What’s so interesting to me is that…. speaking of last night's episode, is for Chuck to try to play me like we were never were in a relationship… and to know how close he and my mama was… Still for years after we broke-up, he was still calling my mama seeing what’s going on."
NeNe calls B.S. on the whole thing, "Please show me where in this episode I acknowledge that I knew her back in my Athens days. I'm still waiting. You haven't found it yet? It doesn’t exist!"
She continued, "Let me remind you once again, I don't practice lying, and in this case there's no need for it. What would I get out of saying I didn't know her if I did know her? Here's the story for hopefully the last time. Chuck, Phaedra, and I are all from Athens, Georgia. Did I know Phaedra when I was in high school, NO! I say clearly on this episode that I am the class of ‘85. Chuck says he's the class of ‘88 and the innocent Phaedra is the class of ‘89. Think about high school! It's generally 9th grade through 12th grade. When I was a senior in high school that means Chuck was a freshman, right? Phaedra would have been in 8th grade at that time, right? I left Athens at 18-years-old. I have lived in Atlanta longer than I have lived anywhere."
Kenya Moore and her desperate to get screentime frienemy Miss Lawrence meet for lunch to gossip about Sav-AWN-a, as pronounced wrong by Krayonce. Kenya reveals that apparently everyone in Atlanta, or at least everyone one in Atlanta that is also on RHOA, has slept with Chuck Smith.
Kenya giggles that Chuck didn't want to put a ring on "jumpoff" Phaedra Parks, because naturally the only reason a man wouldn't want to marry a woman is because she's a jumpoff. Not because people date but don't always fall in love and then they move on. Six proposals, one hired boyfriend, and a Nigerian prince she met on gmail later, Krayonce doesn't seem to understand the behaviors of a normal relationship.
Speaking of Chuck, he invited Phaedra and NeNe Leakes to Athens to propose that they all speak at the Boys & Girls Club there because Chuck is very involved. NeNe now knows Phaedra from growing up. Phaedra reminds us Athens is a one-horse, or one Dairy Queen town, with two high schools and everyone knows of everyone, just in case NeNe forgot.