Oh gracious. As if the women of Real Housewives of Atlanta weren't enough drama on their own, Cynthia Bailey's husband Peter Thomas has to give the ladies a run for their money. Seriously, what is up with Peter lately? His already short fuse seems to be getting shorter and shorter these days.
Perhaps Peter should take up exercising and release some endorphins. I'm sure his wife's co-star Phaedra Parks will cut him a deal on her additional upcoming workout videos. Because more are coming. Yes. There will be more. I'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news!
On last night's "Betty White's Off Their Rockers" NeNe, as well as some of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ladies, joked around with the veteran funny lady in a show that had seniors pranking the younger generation. Who doesn't adore Betty White? Meanwhile, Kenya took major offense to Phaedra's accusations of being bipolar…and I don't blame her. Mental illness isn't something to throw around all willy-nilly…it's a serious topic, and Kenya has clearly been learning all about it on WebMD so she has the proper ammunition against her co-star in their Booty Battle.
Let's start with something light though, shall we?
Oh good lord! So last night we visited the asylum on Real Housewives of Atlanta. Sometimes I just don't even know what to think with the level of delusion of these Housewives. It's like they live in an alternate universe – one I certainly never want to be abducted to – where sanity and decorum is reversed. Heaven help us, but at least we now know the secret of Kenya Moore's "highly coveted" booty: falsies!
So last night things begin with Kenya showing off how she gets her award winning body: the gym. Hmmm… Kenya may have had an award winning body in 1945 when she was Miss USA but um… now she has Photoshop, lipo scars, and Kim K knock-off prosthetic booty and if she thinks that's not obvious, than well… errrrr… yeah.
Kenya and her trainer workout and slam Phaedra Parks for looking less than workout video ready and then Kenya complains that Phaedra is slamming her all over town. Look, ladies – you're both guilty of same thing.
Phaedra is going the glamour route. All work and and no play makes a booty dull. She's doing a donkey booty photo shoot with a celebrity photographer. Thankfully she left her pickles at home and is instead wearing an outfit reminiscent of a pickle. Oh Phaedra – for all your so-called highbrow connections you can't find a stylist?
Ok this is going to be quick and dirty! Tonight is an all-new episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta and much to everyone's chagrin booty-battles continue as the merits of a stallion booty vs. a donkey booty are hotly debated.
Even more exciting Kenya Moore becomes completely unhinged and scares the bejusus out of a buncha southern girls who love to gossip when she shows up at a party in full faux Phaedra Parks Southern Belle regalia! Even team kinda Kenya seems to be realizing this lady is a one shoe short of a pair of Louboutins!
Reality Tea will belive-tweeting all the nonsense, so please join us on twitter. Bless our hearts.
[Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]
TELL US – WHO IS MORE FULL OF FULL OF SHIT-ITIS: KENYA OR PHAEDRA?
Last week was huge forNeNe Leakes. It's no wonder she's been slack on writing her Bravo blog…she's been rubbing elbows with major movie stars and acting on an award-winning sitcom. I mean, seriously, let's all go back to season one when NeNe was drunk and singing in that limo. Did you ever think she would become this much of a legitimate and hard-working success? WIG! Her most recent blog post is definitely assalicious, as she weighs in on the Donkey Booty battle betweenPhaedra ParksandKenya Moore.
Kenya is also making a name for herself, as most housewives do, by recording a new song. I'm sure you watched it in all of it's glory onWatch What Happens Live, but if not, please, immediately click here. It's oh so worth it. She discusses her debut in a recent interview, and she chats about watching herself on Real Housewives of Atlanta.
Last night on Real Housewives of Atlanta it was the great booty show-down. Really. Kenya Moore decided to twirl all over Phaedra Parks' workout video and co-opt it as her own based purely on the fact that she thinks her butt is hotter and that she is more recognizable. Mind you, this is her opinion.
Things begin with Cynthia Bailey judging a hair show. And because she's contractually obligated to spend time with Kenya, Kenya shows up to "support" her. Kenya smizes at the camera, pretends to be earnest, and claims that she and Cynthia have started to become friends. Meanwhile Cynthia is shooting her a wicked stink eye and looking like the last booty she wants to see walk through the door belongs to Kenya.
Speaking of booties… it would appear there's a new horse in the OK get crazy and twirl corral. Chatting show-side with Lawrence and Derek J (bitchy step-sisters 1 & 2), it is revealed that the ever-humble, never wacky Kenya is coming out with her own booty workout video. A Stallion Workout video to be precise and that stallion aims to usurp Phaedra's donkey booty project.
Guess what, dear readers! It's the battle of the booties…the donkey booties! Dare I say it's epic! On the latest episode of Real Housewives of Atlanta, tell-it-like-it-is attorney and mortician Phaedra Parks went head to head with the self-proclaimed favorite new cast member Kenya Moore (And twist!) over a butt enhancing "exercise" video. Somewhere, right now, Richard Simmons is wearing short shorts and a puff-painted American flag muscle tee, rocking back and forth in a corner, and screaming, "Why God, why?" Poor man.
In such a assilicious situation, there is sure to be some discord, but, in my opinion, Kenya was pretty out of line with her demands. Phaedra agrees, and I'm certainly not one to go against anyone who spews gems of advice in the form of the most ridiculous life lessons. Let's be honest, only Phaedra can equate a fancy coffin to an opulent life style…while waxing poetic about dill pickles and homemade macaroni and cheese. Girlfriend is one of a kind, and I love her for it!