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Princesses: Long Island

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It's never a dull moment with the girls of Princesses: Long Island.  Last night there was more girl drama and PDA to go around, but thankfully the ladies refrained from drink throwing and ugly cry mode.  They're really maturing, aren't they?

Joey Lauren, Amanda Bertoncini, and Erica Gimbel decide to go on a run, and I think it's time for Erica to invest in a sports bra.  I'm also super curious as to what Amanda is wearing on her bottom half.  The girls dish about Chanel Omari's bizarre behavior at Amanda's Drink Hanky party, and Joey questions Ashlee White's snobbery.  She gets teary when she hears that Ashlee tried to get Erica and Amanda not to like her.  While Amanda likes Ashlee, she knows her friend looks down on Joey for not coming from money.  Erica and Amanda give Joey tips on how to compose a mature text to Ashlee to resolve their differences.

Meanwhile, Chanel is channeling her inner SJP circa Square Pegs and meeting with her rabbi in some very Mo Rocco shades.  She needs his guidance after her breakdown at the white party.  He basically tells her to suck it up and show restraint in the face of drink throwing asshats, although he's much more eloquent.  When she expresses her fears over never marrying, he urges her to use Jewish history as inspiration to know that nothing is impossible.  I may need to schedule a session with Rabbi Cohen.

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Sunday night ratings round up time! Let's see what y'all were lending your viewership to!

We, of course, were parked squarely in front of Real Housewives of New Jersey to see the big Melissa Gorga cheating allegation. And if you're anything like us you turned off your TV right after to avoid Princesses: Long Island

Unfortunately for Bravo, no one much cared about Melissa's ex-bridesmaid's vendetta or Teresa Giudice's tacit agreement that maybe, possibly, perhaps Melissa never left the Lookers lifestyle cheated! Ratings remained steady from last week, bringing in 2.1 million viewers again. I predict a whole lot more of you will be tuning in to see the big Joew vs Joew brawl; aka Poison Vs. Jr. Mafia Joew: Riot At The Retreat. 

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Have you heard? Princesses: Long Island star Chanel "Coco" Omari is 27 years old and not married. I repeat – NOT married. Broken. So sad. Disgrace to Longuyland. Tune in next week to see Chanel's public stoning. Obviously, I kid (at least I hope) about the stoning, but is this pity party for real?

Chanel's younger sister, Ashley, is engaged to be married, and poor broken Chanel doesn't even have a boyfriend. The hits keep coming when Chanel helps shop for Ashley's bridal gown. At the dress shop, Mom introduces Ashley, the bride, and Chanel, the sister, and the shop clerk asks if Chanel is the "little sister" as if it's relevant and/or any of her business. After a brief moment of silence, Chanel reveals that she's actually the older sister, and then the store clerk buys the first ticket to Chanel's stoning. 

Just for kicks – Ashley insists that Chanel try on a wedding gown. Mom prays, "God willing, Chanel will meet someone," and Chanel weeps. "Sometimes I just want to be normal like everyone else and do the same things like everyone else is doing," she cries. "It's really difficult when you feel like you're always on a different page." 

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Amanda Bertoncini definitely isn't the smartest princess on Long Island. The Princesses: Long Island star introduced us to the Drink Hanky this week.

The Drink Hanky is ridiculously stupid. Amanda is delusional if she thinks the fabric drink pouch is going to make her a millionaire. (Get a job!) The actual product aside, this week's episode of Princesses: Long Island showed Amanda incorporating a FDNY memorial and 9/11 statue from the Jonathan Ielpi Memorial Park into her Drink Hanky photo shoot, offending many viewers.

The sister of Jonathan Ielpi, the fallen 9/11 firefighter depicted in the statue, is speaking out about Amanda's disrespectful shoot. Melissa Ielpi-Brengel shared,  "It opens up the wounds, and it makes you just want to cry all over again."

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It's time for the Sunday ratings round up. Real Housewives of New Jersey and Princesses: Long Island are down again, while Keeping Up With The Kardashians eked up slightly! 

But first, it comes as no surprise that Wigs-Cigs-N-Bump Biermann scored high for the season finale of Don't Be Tardy where she announced that she's pregnant again! 1.3 million people tuned in to see Kim pee on a whole lotta pregnancy tests last Tuesday. 

With the BET Awards happening this Sunday, perhaps a lot less people were interested in reality TV. Unfortunately ratings dropped again for RHONJ. Only 2.195 million people watched the battle of Rosie Vs. Teresa Giudice!

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Princesses: Long Island continues to be a train wreck of epic proportions.

This week, Amanda Bertoncini and Joey Lauren hawk their "ticket to easy street" inventions, the Drink Hanky and Kissamint, and Ashlee White thinks she's adorable when she drops $5300 of her daddy's money on high heels.

Meanwhile, "independamint" Chanel Coco Omari "spontinuitly" decides that Erica Gimbel needs some "interventioning" and "inspirational magnet" Casey Cohen and her "B-Mercedes-W" agree to assist.

Huh? Exactly! Twitchy's above facial expression perfectly captures how I look and feel throughout each and every episode of this ridiculous show.

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Fans of Real Housewives of New Jersey, Princesses Long Island and Keeping Up with the Kardashians can breathe easy this week.  It seems after the NBA finals were over, the audience came back for their Sunday dose of reality TV…at least some of them!   A few (10 million) were distracted with the whole Skywire Live event.  Nik Wallenda probably owes Melissa Gorga some sort of royalties for all the times he uttered "Thank You, Jesus".

All three shows saw an increase in viewers this week after suffering some downward trends each week since their premieres on June 2nd.  RHONJ was back up to 2.41 million viewers tuning in and Princesses Long Island bumped up to 925,000 after hitting just 780,000 last week.  Keeping Up with the Kardashians only ticked up a bit, from 2.1 to 2.2 million. 

Below we have the breakdown of each week since their premieres. 

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Princesses: Long Island tells the same story every week. This week's Jewish husband finding adventure – with a side dish of Erica Gimbel was too hot to handle in high school – begins with Amanda Bertoncini and Chanel "Coco" Omari shopping for dresses for Ashlee White's upcoming 30th birthday bash. 

First, Chanel tells Amanda that ex-boyfriend Michael, who dumped her twice to hook up with his 19-year-old ex-girlfriend, is trying to weasel his way back into her life. Chanel vows to never let that happen again. Amanda tries on a tank top and pretends that is a "super hot" dress. Oy. She best not show too much vagina or her boyfriend will run away. Finally, the princesses try on a few more dresses and get "Coco Bootylicious" in the store.

While having her hair done for the party, Ashlee jokes about turning 30 while looking 4. HAHA. Can someone please explain to Ashlee that "too little to ride alone at Disney" does not equate "looks 4 years old"? She looks like she's pushing 40. Ashlee goes on to to brag about her "huge" party because she's annoying like that.

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