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Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap


Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was a shoe spectacular! And oh man was I jealous over Adrienne’s collection. Adrienne hosted a fashion show to showcase her new shoe line as well as raise money for a charity that’s close to her sole (see what I did there?). Lisa and Adrienne exchanged words and Taylor continued her crusade against Camille. All in all it was a pretty good episode that was light on Richards’ drama and Taylor-Traumas!

Things begin with Lisa rushing in the door and she’s late, late, late for a meeting with wedding planner to the insane Kevin Lee. Kevin has apparently convinced Lisa and Pandora to surrender their brains, because as the invitations are unveiled my heart sank when I saw the ridiculous Michael’s craft project gift box. Did I mention those boxes cost $150 a pop? I apparently missed my calling and shall be quitting RT to race to Beverly Hills and design chintzy wedding invites. At least it was a slightly better color combo. As Lisa and Pandora gush over the boxitations, Ken looks slightly confused about what the eff he just paid for.

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills I came to the conclusion that I am just so burned out on the Taylor, Taylor, Taylor show. And this show in general. Perhaps it’s a symptom of my profession that I watch too much Housewives! ;-)

Things pick up where they left off with Tea Party Part Deux and Camille confronting Taylor about her allegations of abuse. Camille is confused about how Taylor expects her friends to be all ecstatic about her husband when she is telling them he abuses her, yet no one sees any signs of said abuse – physical or otherwise.

Taylor calls Camille “uncool” for outing her marital issues, but Camille seems nonplussed and continues asking Taylor about the inconsistencies going on. Then, Camille pulls a total Dynasty diva moment and storms out! I wish there would be an exciting and frivolous Dynasty-style catfight on this show already. Full-scale hair pulling, sequined gown ripping, destroying of manicured lawns, all out bitch-queen catfight. Can we get on scripting this, Bravo? kthx!

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Last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills dealt with both the past and future as Kyle hosted a séance, the ladies got their faces touched up and reapplied, and Kim finally confessed that she is moving in with her secret boyfriend, Ken much to Kyle’s shock!

Dr. Paul hosts a Night of Beauty at his plastic surgery office. Kyle wants to do a little laser muffin top removal. Kyle is excited, yet nervous about being subjected to the chub-munching octopus, but threatens to move into Paul’s office if it works. Paul tells her to relax and then the torture of lying there while some little red swirls dance across her mythical fat roll begins.

Lisa is wandering through the labyrinth of Botox and laser treatments looking for Kyle when she stumbles across Taylor. Taylor has snacks and is waiting with some sort of weird numbing goop smeared all over her face as she is prepping to get some new fillers in her cheeks. Lisa advises her to skip the procedures and go straight for the food, which is untouched. Taylor informs us that she has a “genetically thin face” and no matter how much she eats she always looks like Skeletor.

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills things got wild Moroccan style at Pandora’s insane, incredible, fantastic engagement party. Can Mohammed be my godfather? Kim debuted her new man who is also a Ken! And Taylor and Russell got a little threatastic with the tabloids. Oh, and Taylor started planning another Birthday Party for Kennedy!

Lisa is driving through her hood amidst the palm trees, Bentleys, designer logos, and mega-mansions casually calling all her friends to remind them that the party of the year will be happening on Tuesday so they better show up. Sadly, everyone is screening her calls. No interest in the British accent today, co-stars? Finally Kyle answers and is wondering what on earth to wear?! Something fun and something ball gown. Lisa fills Kyle in on her little cooking lesson with Adrienne. They are both surprised Adrienne didn’t rub some hand lotion on the poor chicken!

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Last night on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills everybody got pampered and relaxed and got along swimmingly. Oh, wait – wrong show! The ladies continued their trip back in time to Beverly Hills High with Kyle playing the real-life all grown up Brenda Walsh, and Kim as her sidekick, and poor Brandi the victim of all their immaturity. I give Brandi credit – she stood her ground while retaining her dignity and did not bend to the almighty queens of bitchery.

Things start off with a little cooking lesson. Lisa has decided she can bear no more of Adrienne’s inadequacies in the kitchen and simply must teach her to roast a chicken. After everyone puts on their surgical gloves, they begin washing the chicken with dish soap – for anti-bacterial purposes. Then they stuff things up his bum after removing his guts. I guess Lisa was practicing for her treatment of Brandi later on! Adrienne is absolutely hopeless in the kitchen – hence the reason she has a chef – can’t find the salt and pepper or any of her three fridges, and just isn’t having fun. Was anyone else surprised they were stuffing a chicken’s butt with all their jewelry on?

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On last night’s episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, the ladies hit the slopes in Colorado. Lisa and Taylor continue their passive aggressive feud to dominate Kyle’s friendship by trying to out-mean girl each other. And Kyle and Kim try to make some headway in their badly tarnished relationship.

CLICK HERE TO SEE SHOCKING PHOTOS OF TAYLOR ARMSTRONG’S PHYSICAL ABUSE

Kyle is moving to a new 7,000 square foot house and she feels this is meant to be her house – in fact she stalked it because she feels connected to its energy. Too bad the house couldn’t get a restraining order! Kyle shows Portia a beautifully framed portrait of Kyle and Mauricio on their wedding day and despite a recent blind item hinting that they may not be so in love, I hope that’s not the case! Kyle’s bestie and decorator, Faye Resnick (looking as be-nipped and tucked as ever) shows up to help the Umansky’s move and make some decisions about where Mauricio’s pool table can go – only in the garage since furniture is more important than man cavedom. Faye discovers amongst Kyle’s possessions an enormous self-portrait. Here’s hoping she’s not arrogant enough to hang that up on the walls! Yikes!

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Last night’s Season Premier of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills did not disappoint! Oh, these ladies – you know what they say: “More money, more problems!” Last night’s episode filled us in on what the ladies have been up to since last season and apparently not much has changed: Adrienne and Paul still barely tolerate each other, Lisa and Ken and Giggy, are still Lisa and Ken and Giggy. Kyle and Kim are still on the rocks and well, Camille she’s still arrogant and oblivious! Gotta love her! Before the the bickering starts, Bravo does a solid and gives a touching segment about Russell Armstrong and the housewives reacting to his passing.

The episode opens on Aug 29,2011, shortly after Russell’s untimely death and all seriousness aside: we meet Adrienne’s new face! Adrienne is looking 10 years younger and basically frozen in time. The cast sits down at Adrienne’s, to discuss Russell’s suicide. Kyle brings up how financial pressure in Beverly Hills puts so much strain on people. Lisa describes that she always felt an emotional disconnect with Russell – and that perhaps getting too much information about Russell from Taylor made Lisa shy away from him. Interesting… Kim points out that the cast focused so much on Taylor, because of their friendship, and not on how Russell was doing. All of the ladies and their husbands express guilt over not being more aware of Russell’s emotional state. Kyle is hopeful that Taylor will not feel responsible for Russell’s death given that she left the marriage shortly before he took his own life. It was heart wrenching to see the ladies and their husbands speak so openly about the tragedy.

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The 12th episode of the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills aired last night with a bit of an emotional feel. On one hand, we had a young woman beginning a new chapter in her life by graduating, while on the other hand, we had Camille, who had to begin the process of closing the chapter on her 13-year marriage.

The episode begins with Lisa and Kyle meeting up for dinner at Lisa’s restaurant. Lisa reveals hubby Ken is getting lasik eye surgery, Kyle shares her eldest daughter Farrah is graduating and all seems to be going well, that is until Taylor sends a text to announce her impending arrival. Lisa, who reveals she has known Kyle way more longer than Taylor ever will, isn’t happy she has to share her Kyle with Taylor.

And finally!  Though seemingly out of the blue, Lisa brings up the NYC issue and Taylor’s role in Camille’s anger during the dinner. About time somebody brought up Taylor’s role in this incident! While it appeared Kim had been the only one to put two and two together all season, it seems so did Lisa though she just decided to keep it quiet. Lisa also suspects Taylor was the one responsible for getting Camille all riled up in her hotel room by telling her what the others said about her. Something we now all know to be true. Lisa wants to confront Taylor but Kyle convinces her not to. Taylor arrives and Lisa appears to be a tad jealous and does a bad job at hiding it. Then out of no where, Lisa tells Taylor it’s time to get real about her marital issues. “Cut the crap, be honest. Stop laughing and joking,” demands Lisa. Taylor continues to laugh while I patiently awaited a snap out of it slap from Lisa. Unfortunately, that doesn’t happen and the ladies make a toast instead.

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