Andy Cohen wants us to believe the drama on Real Housewives is genuine. <fits of laughter> I know, right? It’s real, he said. It’s all about casting the right, highly emotional women, he said. And if you believe that, I have a bridge to sell you, he probably said to himself.
Andy addressed the scripted complaints that plague the franchise, actually the majority reality shows these days, in a recent interview with Attitude Magazine.
Santa Claus came early, y’all! Forget about that cookbook, those cozy socks or that chic handbag you’re hoping to see under the tree — Real Housewives of D.C.’s famewhorusband Tareq Salahi has given you the most wonderful gift. His belly could definitely shake like a bowl full of jelly… ironic, no?
Tareq is finally responding to estranged wife Michaele Salahi’s recent allegations. It’s humorous, it’s mythical, it’s everything you would think it could possibly be. Tareq is quite “fra-gee-lay” in the following interview. Perhaps he should have asked Santa for a leg lamp instead of a plastic, White House party-crashing bride.
Tareq, who has filed for divorce from his better other half, spoke with the Huffingtonpost.com defending himself against Michaele’s claims of abuse. He begins, “She’s a piece of work. First it was she found true love with Neil Schon [of] Journey and now that she lawyered up, they are grasping for a way out so she doesn’t have to pay up her side of our financial obligations.” Don’t stop believin’, Tareq! She’ll come clean about her cheating ways and you’ll get your money! Will the Journey jokes ever get old (Perhaps in 2012, but not yet!)?
Tareq is still in contact with his former lady love. He says, “When I spoke to Michaele yesterday, she said she didn’t know her lawyer wrote those things and was sorry… I doubt that. She is very calculating and devious. So now, she says, after 12 years, I’m suddenly controlling or abusive… [w]hen in fact I loved her, and did everything to support my wife and put her on a pedestal to make her a shining star.”
“I really think Michaele thinks she’s still on Real Housewives and needs to create drama,” Tareq continues. Well, someone certainly does, but I won’t name names! Seriously, why did these two part ways (besides that whole “she became a Journey groupie” situation)? It’s like they are the same person.
Tareq is quick to note that his wife is famous (poor choice of words) for twisting reality in her favor. He even goes as far to call her a liar, reminding ‘fans’ that “Michaele is a well-known and documented liar from The Real Housewives of D.C., to our personal life with her other false statements such as being a Redskins cheerleader,Victoria’s Secret model, college graduate, her M.S… Everything was a lie in our marriage.” So, Tareq was just as fooled as the rest of us about Michaele’s cheerleading past? Seriously? Even the Redskins knew she was never on the sidelines, but Tareq… he coveted those fake pom-poms until his marriage fell apart. I’m not even going to touch his accusations that the M.S. claim was a lie. Shame… on both of them.
It’s sad, really. Poor Tareq is just an innocent party, victimized by his soon to be ex-wife’s web of deceit. He reveals, “Michaele abandoned her home, committed adultery and lied to all her friends. Michaele lied about her real home [when] filming the Real Housewives.” Truly? Michaele is the only one who lied about her real home? How tragic for Tareq to spend a full Bravo season filming and pseudo-living in a house that wasn’t. Even. His. He must be devastated to learn that truth. I bet Michelle Obama isn’t her half-sister either. Tareq must feel so betrayed — Why else would he have crashedattended that White House dinner?
It gets better. Tareq was totally blinded by Michaele. He thought she was “just a small town girl.” Too much? While it’s hard for him to admit, he shares, “Michaele lied to her husband about attending college. Michaele lied to her own friends, family and cast about an eating disorder. Michaele lied to the public about loving our dog Rio. In short, nearly everything [she] told me was an apparent lie.” Wait, she lied about not eating?!? I don’t buy it. However, when she starts pretending she loves a dog when she’s clearly a cat lady person, that’s when I draw the line. B*tch.
So, let’s break this down. Tareq was a doting, clueless husband, who is not at all shady or fame hungry while Michaele was brilliant enough to make up these falsities on her own. Sure, and he’s just friends with Michael Lohan because they share the same hobbies. I don’t know about you, but I’m about to pour a glass of Oasis wine and watch an episode of “Lifestyles of the Chubby and Irrelevant” if you’d care to join me. Those Salahis, bringing the Christmas cheer all year long!
WHAT DO YOU THINK OF TAREQ SALAHI’S INTERVIEW? WAS HE IN THE DARK ABOUT MICHAELE’S ALLEGED LIES? DO YOU THINK EITHER OF THEM WILL EVER JUST GO AWAY?