I think Siggy Flicker cried once or twice. Just for some variety.
I don’t know if someone put fire ants in Tereas’s Spanx, or what, but she was on a tear last night. She was right back in the season four reunion, anger brimming over and making a big mess. She certainly let her zen slip, didn’t she?
“Jim was a self-made, successful man at a very young age. He has never done drugs and has never been in trouble with the law. He put himself through undergraduate, then through a Masters in Public Administration at Columbia University while working at a pharmaceutical company,” bragged Amber. “Jim was then accepted to law school and once again attended in the evening while working for a biotech company. In addition, Jim was raising his son, Michael.”
“I kind of meant what I said on that couch — this show is so f—ed up. As I sit and watch the reunion, I wonder what goes through people’s head sometimes. Bobby literally spitting on me as he screams at a friend of 10 years, Jim whipping out his files and then of all things says I have a fat ass, LOL! For what? Fame? I literally sat there saying to myself time and time again, “What the hell am I doing here?” Again, not ever saying I’m too good, but just different.”
Are my eyes deceiving me?!? Has Amber Marchese written her shortest Real Housewives of New Jersey blog of the season? Yes, I think she has. Thank you, Jesus! In the blog, Amber schooled us about what happens at a reunion, questioned whether or not Dina Manzo has a heart, defended her use of “The Cancer” ad nauseam, and sided with Jacqueline Laurita in the messy Laurita/ Manzo family feud.
“Hello Housewife friends,” exclaimed Amber. “Welcome to the jungle baby! My first reunion was a wild ride. Call me sick and twisted, but I had an unbelievable time at the reunion when most, I have been warned, dread it. I felt like it was ‘The Great Purge’ and when I went home I felt relieved of any built up tension. I don’t care if anyone has a grudge against me, my slate is clean and I harbor no ill feelings towards anyone. I love to argue my point, and I truly stood by all of my convictions this season, so I was ready to say exactly what was on my mind, and then some.”
Jacqueline Laurita wasn’t able to attend the season six Real Housewives of New Jerseyreunion, so she took to Twitter to share her thoughts on the topics as it aired. Ugh. Raise your hand if you’re shocked. “Not on the reunion but I’ll probably tweet during it,” she tweeted before the show. Probably? HAHAHA!
Because Bravo knows a good thing when it sees it, last night we were treated to even more madness from the Real Housewives of New Jersey. While the season was supposed to be over after the reunion trilogy (The Hunger Games it was not), the network decided to milk a little bit more out of the women and the viewers. So it is without further ado, I present to you the lost footage from season four. It's actually very telling to see what ended up on the cutting room floor, and what's being revisited in light of the ongoing feud surrounding Teresa Giudice and everyone elseMelissa Gorga. Editing truly is magical!
Narrated by Andy Cohen, the episode takes us behind the scenes of what happened during the season and at the far-too-drawn-out reunion. Buckle up (if you haven't boycotted the show yet!), and enjoy the bumpy ride with Melissa, Teresa, Caroline Manzo, Jacqueline Laurita, and Kathy Wakile. It's truly a sight.
We begin with a lost cause…Andy is trying to convince Juicy Joe (once again) that homophobic slurs are offensive and nasty. Joe is all, Ahhwatdisagain? before turning into a brick wall of Who Cares. By the way, did you know that Joe went on a boat ride with seven guys and one of them was gay? He is not a homophobe. The comments he made about Gregg Bennett were meant to be funny, not mean. He's so sorry Greggy doesn't have a sense of humor! Jacqueline tells Andy that she thinks Joe speaks more out of ignorance than maliciousness. Fair enough.
So we've made it. It's the end of Real Liars Housewives of New Jersey. I don't know about you, but I am so relieved to be done with this show. I don't know where I stand on things other than to say that I can see everyone's points as valid, but I'm tired of hearing about them.
So let's get started. We begin with Juicy Giudice still under interrogation. He's familiar with it by now, I suppose, given all his legal infractions. Caroline Manzo's comments about how Teresa Giudice will leave her husband and write a book about it if he goes to prison are revisited.
Caroline seems to be saying without saying it that editing minced her comment or took it out of context. Or perhaps she just doesn't want to admit that she said and meant it. There's so much backpedaling with these people I never know what to think. Anyway, Caroline dismisses it as a "hypothetical" and Juicy snaps that Caroline is a "know it all" She is – a very unwarranted 'know it all.'
Caroline says since Teresa is discussing her marriage with magazines, it's fair game. Andy Cohen asks about Joe admitting in Napa they got paid by the magazines, but all of the sudden it's denies, denies, denies. 'Huh? I said that? I was drunk? Whaddai say?' Joe and Teresa are masters of obfuscation. That should be their next book!
Here's the conclusion I've come to regarding Real Housewives of New Jersey. Before the show, these women were nothing but actual Housewives – and they gossiped and talked about each other, themselves, their friends and family. They've known each other a long time and the past runs deep.
I'm positive they've confessed things to each other and about each other that they never thought would see the light of day on national TV. And even more so I imagine they can't even remember half of what they said to each other and so it's a constant cycle of backtracking, justifying, and irrational behavior.
This makes them all liars. Every. Single. Last. One. Of. Them. Not calculated liars, but circumstantial ones. But because none of them can behave like human beings they all look bad.
I'm positive all the anti- Teresa Giudice people are going to say I'm a biased for saying this, but who cares (to quote Juicy Giudice). I feel bad for her and this show has destroyed her life. Just as Jacqueline Laurita is not cut out for this, neither is Teresa. I recently watched some clips of S1 and S2 and she is a completely different woman. Teresa has lost her light and has become severe and harsh. This show has consumed her – and it's really unflattering.