Season five of Real Housewives of New Jersey has come to an end. Andy's like, Thank you, Jesus! Part two of the reunion attracted 2.099 million viewers which means just under 400,000 jumped ship since last week. My guess? They were among the 16 MILLION who were preparing for the Walking Dead.
The Kardashians, who are less dead but pumped full of preservatives just the same, remained steady despite the competition. 2.182 million loyal fans tuned in to Keeping Up with the Kardashians instead of the zombies.
Teresa Giudice closed season 5 with a bang – big, ol' superficial bang! Unfortunately Teresa points out that the pesky editing devil was up to his old tricks again and the fight we saw her having with Caroline Manzo seconds before the show ended, actually happened much, much earlier in the day.
Calling her missive "I'm Stumped!" (copying Melissa Gorga, I see), Teresa doesn't bother with the red-tape of her bosses over at Bravo and as she usually does when she wants to point out how they've been wrong she resorts to using her own site. Let's see what Ms. Teresa has to say from her very own Fabulicious website.
This week at theReal Housewives of New Jersey reunion, we all noticed that Jacqueline Laurita was uncharacteristically quiet. She shared in her new blog why she was barely speaking and it's not because she only knows how to communicate through Tweets now. She also confirms that she hasn't made a decision about next season….
Jacs explains, "My goal for the reunion: Keep it real but "speak only when spoken to" and only on issues concerning me or a scene I was involved in. (Unlike last years reunion.) Last reunion I was brutally honest to the point that I said things that were not my place to say, because I was angry. I crossed the line a few times when I just should have stayed quiet. When I hear people lying to or about me, it hurts and angers me and I start calling people out. After I saw what that looked like last reunion, I decided I would not let that happen again, and I would have more self-control over my emotions in the future."
So let's talk about what happened. Andy Cohen has obviously been watching a lot of old episodes of 20/20 and he put on his hard-hitting interviewer costume to ask all the really deep questions we've been obsessively tweeting him for seasons. A sign of end times? Also everyone behaved like an adult for the most part. Probably because three-fourths of the people on that stage aren't coming back next season and had nothing to lose or gain. I personally enjoy Jacqueline Laurita much better when her sequins are flying out of her seat and shimmering with rage.
Was Kathy Wakile even there? I wouldn't have even noticed her except she was rocking a low-rent version of Melissa Gorga's blackout eyes that she was sporting all season. It was so much black she looked like a panda bear. Speaking of pandas, since the government shutdown I can't watch the baby panda cam on the National Zoo website. Get it together federal government! Get it together Kathy's makeup team!
Caroline wrote, "think I'm going to make this short and sweet, because to put all my thoughts into a single blog would take forever and quite possibly turn the blog into a novel, so here goes: I have made the decision to leave The Real Housewives of New Jersey."