The women of Real Housewives of New York are a classy bunch, that can't be denied. They are reserved, educated, and charitable. Oh, wait.
Someone call Joe Francis because Sonja Morgan and Ramona Singer are Middle-Aged Broads Gone Wild! While vacationing in St. Barts for the cast trip, the ladies enjoyed lots of booze, parties, cat fights and sexy time. The kickers? Most of their antics were so insane that they couldn't be shown on Bravo. The raciest moments of the trip were relegated to the cutting room floor, but I have some of the deets. However, don't say I didn't warn you…if you are concerned you make accidentally picture some of these things in your head, then click at your own risk!
Stop the presses and pour me a Skinnygirl margarita! On second thought, don't…I prefer my cocktails to taste good and go straight to my hips.
I have some wonderful news that will excite the masses. Whether you're a diehard Bethenneedy fan, a Bethennybody-else-but-her hater, or a passive and neutral Frankel, my dear, I don't give a damn, you are going to like what I have to say! Well, that third group probably couldn't care less, but the others–oh, the others!–will be thrilled! P.S. I'm working on a trademark for my newly coined phrases, so use at your own risk. TM, Ms. Frankel, TM! ;)
Anyhoo, can you guess who this post is about? Anyone? Real Housewives of New York veteran and purveyor of Hoppylicious spin-offs and diet liquor concoctions Bethenny Frankel made an announcement earlier Monday on her website. The post was aptly titled "My Big Announcement." You have to give her credit, Bethenny always has been a straight shooter!
Last night on Real Housewives of New York one special housewife had a resurgence of adolescence when all she talked about was me, me, me, mememememememmememememe! Yep – one whole long hour of Aviva Drescher, her phobias, the horrible St. Barths psycation, and her problems with Tweedle Drunk and Tweedle Cum. Luckily Heather Thomson was there to speak for the masses, be the voice of reason, and finally suggest that she maybe just LET. IT. GO.
Things begin with a dinner party in a lovely UES apartment. Attending the party are siamese twins Pinot Singer and Sonja Morgan and their frienemy LuAnn de Lesseps. Apparently all three ladies share a mutual friend who is probably looking for camera time because she's selling her apartment, her recipes, her interior design business, her dignity, her husband, whatever…
LuAnn lets us know things have been strained with Jacques since she told him about the incidents in St. Barths, mainly pertaining to a late-night episode in piratry, so she's been giving him extra reassurance that she cares.
The National Enquirer (quick break to snicker) recently announced that George's current girlfriend, knock-out Stacy Kiebler is reportedly uber jealous to learn of his former fling.
Carole insomuch as admitted the hook-up, tweeting: “I don’t kiss and tell, but if I did, I’d say Clooney was a very good kisser…” Which infuriated an already "extremely jealous" Stacy.
Apparently the problem lies in the fact that George never told Stacy about his sexytimes with Carole! “Stacy knows he’s hooked up with a lot of other women before they started going out. But she thought she knew about all of them. Now Stacy is wondering who else George didn’t tell her about.”
Oh those Manzo boys are quite the little business men, aren't they? First BLK Water and now a restaurant! Real Housewives of New Jersey'sAlbie and Chris have teamed up with two New York City based restaurateurs Michael Sinensky and Sean McGarr to open a place in Hoboken which will serve dishes created with local produce, meat, and seafood, as well as craft beers and wine.
The restaurant will be called Little Town New Jersey, and it already has a New York counterpart.
Last night on MTV Real World Spring Break, oh… errrr…Oops! I mean Middle-Aged (Wannabe) Girls Gone Wild. Oh… danggit – I mean Real Housewives of New York! There we go, that's the right show. Anyway, last night on RHONY the battle between Turtletime and Hurricane Aviva continued to rage. I think we're going to have to declare this one a draw because both these crazies went in circles like a typhoon and I don't think anything was resolved!
So things begin with a little bitching and arguing over what else – girls trip vs. couple's retreat. What about therapeutic retreat? Why didn't Bravo call in some therapists to assist with the lunacy and sit everyone down for a good ol' " I feel" session followed by some team building exercises?
Over breakfast, Reid and Russ are present and this is not acceptable. A clearly hung-over Sonja Morgan is shoveling in the food at warp speed and complaining about being called white trash. Pinot Singer and Sonja try to "pretend" they have no idea what that even means and hop on Google for a little investigative research. They get on dictionary.com and are most surprised to find a photo of themselves right next to the description. Oh, that can't be because White Trash means "poor" and they are not poor. They are just bankrupt and married to (or divorced from) money. Then someone distracts them by yelling wine and they decide oh, well at least White Trash means you're nice and it doesn't have anything to do with being inhospitable anyway.
While the Real Housewives of New York star maintains that things were kept strictly platonic and she didn't get to swashbucklin with a certain pirate, RadarOnline reports that LuAnn's longtime beau is ready to make her walk the plank over the rumors!
"All of the housewives are sent advanced copies of the upcoming episode that is going to be aired a week beforehand," a source close to the situation reveals. "Normally, LuAnn and Jacques watch the upcoming episode together but this past week, for the first time in a very long time, they didn't."