Happy Election Day. Or is it unhappy? What’s more distressing: The 2016 presidential election, or a Real Housewives Of Orange County reunion? I can’t choose who won or lost the debates that happened on Bravo’s biggest stage last night, moderated by Andy Cohen, who believes in hard-hitting journalism – like how did Tamra Judge achieve such a great ass?!
So, I might kinda love Kelly Dodd. Throw me under the bus in Ireland – I don’t care.
Sure, Kelly is crazy and shoots her mouth off, but really – Tamra never met an F-bomb or a crass comment she didn’t like, and Shannon Beador willingly admits being friends with a woman whose “trademark thing” is going around accusing people of “sucking d–k for money,” so what I’m saying is that the high horse bucked y’all off, and told you to get in the donkey pen with the other asses.
Vicki does reprehensible things and doesn’t understand that they’re reprehensible. She also can’t apologize for hurting people’s feelings. Briana is right about that. Yet, for all Briana’s parenting of her mother, Vicki refuses to see the reality that people don’t forget things you’ve said or done because you give them a good whoop it up or two. Vicki’s version of friendships are as deep as one night stands. Although I honestly don’t know that I would be offering sincere apologies to any of these biatches either. Do any of them really deserve one? Truly?
I imagine that Tamra Judge, Heather Dubrow, and Shannon Beador see themselves as victorious after last night’s episode – they have triumphed in the face of evil, stood in solidarity, and exorcised the devil. Yeah, except, not cause the devil is inside.
Kelly Dodd‘s motto is, “If you’re not first, you’re last.” Well, there ya go. Poor Meghan only lost by association. I cannot believe four so-called adult women were behaving so Jerry Springer and then jumping through hoops trying to deny, deflect, and justify their actions. It was nonstop sifting through everyone lying while pointing fingers at other people’s lies. Yep, I’m looking at you TamraJudge, ShannonBeador, and ESPECIALLY Vicki Gunvalson!
What a strange episode! So Kelly Dodd is a rampant liability who needs to be exposed, so suddenly the ladies are all BFF with Vicki again. Yes, even Shannon. Tequila Shots became the Trojan Horse of RHOC last night, and it was well, awful.
These women know Vicki’s love tank, all cylinders of it, are running on “E” and her yearning to be their friend is so palpable you could drink it in a shot glass. Yet, who is Kelly’s only conceivable ally on RHOC? Vicki – the other ostracized one. And how do you get Kelly defenseless when she’s indefensible? Capture Vicki, leaving her bogged down in the conflict between what is right and what is right for her right now.
I honestly don’t know where to begin with last night’s trip to Ireland, except that I’m incredibly disappointed that there were no cameras rolling to see Heather Dubrow get kicked out of a bathroom, Kim Richards-style, in a high-class department store, then escorted out the door for being one of those raucous Americans. You just know that was the very most earth-shatteringly distressing moment of Heather’s life.
It’s not like Shannon had an epiphany No, she was just tired of everyone pointing out the obvious: she has unresolved issues with Vicki. Of course Vicki resorted to thinly veiled threats basically forcing Shannon to act like her friend, or else, because the best way to start over is by holding a person hostage by potential secrets. ‘Or else’ what…we’re not sure since Vicki has the ‘or else’ in ‘the vault’ stored alongside the date she realized Brooks was faking cancer.
We’re moving on, we’re moving backwards, and we’re moving into straight crazy territory on Real Housewives Of Orange County. Who isn’t on the edge of their seat after that preview for the rest of the season? In a war between Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Judge, it was always a toss-up, but then Tamra found Jesus through jumping jacks and Vicki got ‘duped’ by her own desperation, so now I don’t know… It’s probably still a toss-up!
Apparently Bravo is using Tamra as some sort of Kelly Dodd reflecting pool. Like, ‘Oh remember way back when when Tamra was an irascible ‘naked wasted getting’ bitch throwing wine in her friend’s faces? But now that she’s found the ever-supportive Eddie, she’s calm and centered.’ Like Kelly could be that too if she divorced Michael. I don’t know. Crazy is as crazy does, and crazy takes advice from Tamra and Vicki!
Yikes was last night’s Real Housewives Of Orange County a mess! We all know Bravo loves a family drama, but David’s mother-in-law covertly, sniper from the side-style, attacking Shannon Beadorwhile roaming the crowd at a place called The Blue Beet during her granddaughters’ rock star debut… Well, even I’m shocked!
There was a lot of ridiculous this episode. Vicki Gunvalson being utterly baffled that her children consider her a high-maintenance nightmare? Ridiculous! Tamra Judge truly believing herself a ‘peacemaker’. RIDICULOUS! Shannon micro-mom-aging her preteen daughters rock rehearsal, then taking OVER the microphone during practice to demonstrate for them. Ridiculous!