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Heidi Montag

First comes love, then comes marriage…now is it time for the baby carriage? Well, for this couple, it was more like, first come reality villains, then comes crystals, then perhaps a Montag-Pratt bambino? Lord help us all!

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt rose to fame on The Hills as a relatively normal, if not slightly obnoxious couple. However, once they got that first taste of notoriety, the pair continued to violate our television screens as the resident bad guys with a penchant for severe plastic surgery and glassy igneous rocks. They’ve been relatively quiet of late, but I’m not going to hold my breath that they stay that way, given that they’re scheduled to be on the upcoming season of WE’s Marriage Boot Camp. Could they be prepping to become a party of three?

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Prison Wives Club on Lifetime

Coming soon to a TV near you.. Prison Wives Club!

Yes.. this is happening. No.. it will not star Phaedra Parks and Teresa Giudice and air on BravoPrison Wives Club premieres October 28 on Lifetime.

Prison Wives Club follows four women living with their decisions to fall in love with and remain married to convicted felons. While facing judgment from their friends and families, each episode explores how these women struggle to find normalcy despite their unconventional choices when it comes to the men in their lives,” shared the network. “Restricted to limited contact with their spouses who are serving sentences ranging from ten years to life, the ladies band together for support; but this group comes with its own sentence as they don’t always agree on how to behave as a wife on the outside.”

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Tori Spelling

Well, color me shocked! True Tori is coming back for a second season. Forget about that very public affair of Dean McDermott that was tabloid fodder for months as he and his wife Tori Spelling prepped for their latest reality series. Pretend like the world didn’t watch as they went to therapy about said infidelity. Let’s not even get started on Tori’s subsequent hospitalization for stress. No big deal! Apparently, it’s all about living life on camera no matter what. Why am I so surprised? After all, I blog about people just like them (lovers of attention, every last one!) almost every single day.

Still, after a very raw and awkward first season, I couldn’t believe that Tori and Dean would put their young family back in the spotlight. I guess I should look for themes. This season will totally be “the rebuilding.” Am I right?

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shaniece evelyn lozada

Ahhh, the rite of passage known as one's twenty-first birthday. I remember mine fondly. After all, it was just a couple decades years ago (around the same time Evelyn Lozada celebrated hers). I had a Spanish final exam the morning of my birthday, so none of that hitting the bars at the stroke of midnight the night before…oh no, I just had to start the festivities at lunch on the big day. And talk about stylish! I was sporting a turtleneck, Pilgrim shoes, and high-waisted jeans (how they are making a second round in fashion is beyond me), and damn did I look good as I hit up all the classiest joints Clemson had to offer in the late '90s. I'd say my twenty-first birthday was almost–ALMOST–as over-the-top as Evelyn's night out for daughter Shaniece Hairston…except I didn't get a Benz…and I still can't look at butterscotch Schnapps. 

Over the weekend, Shaniece was treated to a major time in Vegas this past weekend courtesy of her mother's new fiance generosity. She was even gifted a Mercedes Benz G550. Every twenty-one-year-old should learn about the responsibilities of adulthood by driving a car worth well over $100K, right?

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Jason Hoppy  on his way to work

While I am beyond thankful that Bethenny Frankel and Jason Hoppy have finally come to a custody agreement regarding daughter Bryn, there seems to be no end in sight when it comes to finalizing their divorce. I am not at all shocked, as it seems these two are out for blood. Yawn.

The pair first filed for divorce in January of 2013, so it's been well over a year that these two have been fighting. The alleged main issue? Jason wanting a pretty penny for helping build Bethenny's Skinnygirl empire. 

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terry dubrow paul nassif

Y'all, I'm having an off week. It's the only way to explain my utter shock when watching a preview clip for Paul Nassif and Terry Dubrow's new plastic surgery show. I've read about it. Hell, I've written about it! It's titled BOTCHED for crying out loud! I can't exactly say I didn't know the premise of the pair's new endeavor!

Alas, my tolerance for creepy isn't what it used to be in my younger days, and I could barely stomach the bad plastic surgery. How does this even happen? I am sure the stories will be sad and the Bravolebrities past and present will nip, tuck, and repair these folks, resulting in a heartwarming and tearful reveal, but yikes! I guess I didn't realize how many ladies (and gents!) out there actually strive to look like a feline! Although now that you mention it, Adrienne Maloof WAS married to Paul

That said, I will certainly be watching Botched when it premieres on E! later this month. I may be watching with one hand over my eyes, but I'll be watching nonetheless!

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leann eddie 2

There are not a lot of celebrities that annoy me to the extent that LeAnn Rimes annoys me. I used to be obsessed with her back when she was a young country singer dating Andrew Keegan (who didn't adore him?). Now, her penchant for over-sharing and vine videos just rubs me the wrong way. It's not even the infidelity or the Twitter battles she's now famous for, it's just her demeanor. She's very good at being condescending.

Anyhoo, I'll get off my soapbox long enough to write about her upcoming reality show with husband Eddie Cibrian that I won't be watching. Just kidding! I will totally be all over that show. As much as she grates on my nerves, LeAnn is my own personal train wreck. I just can't look away.

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paul nassif terry dubrow botched

I'm going to go ahead and declare 2014 the Year of the Husbands. It may be a bold statement, but I am going to make it nonetheless. Bear with me while I break down my train of thought.

First, let's recall this season's Real Housewives of Atlanta. Never has there been a more husband-centric season of any Bravo show. Sure, the husbands are always around, but they are usually extras at best. They may contribute to the drama, but their participation is usually minimal. Of course, with this season's RHOA, the husbands took center stage with their ridiculousness so much so that they scored their own reunion special. Now, Paul Nassif, formerly of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, and Real Housewives of Orange County's Terry Dubrow are throwing their hats into the ring

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