What a strange episode! So Kelly Dodd is a rampant liability who needs to be exposed, so suddenly the ladies are all BFF with Vicki again. Yes, even Shannon. Tequila Shots became the Trojan Horse of RHOC last night, and it was well, awful.
These women know Vicki’s love tank, all cylinders of it, are running on “E” and her yearning to be their friend is so palpable you could drink it in a shot glass. Yet, who is Kelly’s only conceivable ally on RHOC? Vicki – the other ostracized one. And how do you get Kelly defenseless when she’s indefensible? Capture Vicki, leaving her bogged down in the conflict between what is right and what is right for her right now.
I honestly don’t know where to begin with last night’s trip to Ireland, except that I’m incredibly disappointed that there were no cameras rolling to see Heather Dubrow get kicked out of a bathroom, Kim Richards-style, in a high-class department store, then escorted out the door for being one of those raucous Americans. You just know that was the very most earth-shatteringly distressing moment of Heather’s life.
It’s not like Shannon had an epiphany No, she was just tired of everyone pointing out the obvious: she has unresolved issues with Vicki. Of course Vicki resorted to thinly veiled threats basically forcing Shannon to act like her friend, or else, because the best way to start over is by holding a person hostage by potential secrets. ‘Or else’ what…we’re not sure since Vicki has the ‘or else’ in ‘the vault’ stored alongside the date she realized Brooks was faking cancer.
We’re moving on, we’re moving backwards, and we’re moving into straight crazy territory on Real Housewives Of Orange County. Who isn’t on the edge of their seat after that preview for the rest of the season? In a war between Vicki Gunvalson and Tamra Judge, it was always a toss-up, but then Tamra found Jesus through jumping jacks and Vicki got ‘duped’ by her own desperation, so now I don’t know… It’s probably still a toss-up!
Apparently Bravo is using Tamra as some sort of Kelly Dodd reflecting pool. Like, ‘Oh remember way back when when Tamra was an irascible ‘naked wasted getting’ bitch throwing wine in her friend’s faces? But now that she’s found the ever-supportive Eddie, she’s calm and centered.’ Like Kelly could be that too if she divorced Michael. I don’t know. Crazy is as crazy does, and crazy takes advice from Tamra and Vicki!
Yikes was last night’s Real Housewives Of Orange County a mess! We all know Bravo loves a family drama, but David’s mother-in-law covertly, sniper from the side-style, attacking Shannon Beadorwhile roaming the crowd at a place called The Blue Beet during her granddaughters’ rock star debut… Well, even I’m shocked!
There was a lot of ridiculous this episode. Vicki Gunvalson being utterly baffled that her children consider her a high-maintenance nightmare? Ridiculous! Tamra Judge truly believing herself a ‘peacemaker’. RIDICULOUS! Shannon micro-mom-aging her preteen daughters rock rehearsal, then taking OVER the microphone during practice to demonstrate for them. Ridiculous!
Last week, the ladies were in a frightening accident after Tamra Judge flipped their ATV in the Glamis Dunes. Vicki was airlifted to the hospital but poor lowly Tamra only got whisked away by ambulance.
Heather Dubrow and Kelly Dodd, the luckiest stars in the Bravo galaxy, celebrate their survival with some judgey phone calls in between many glasses of champs (and one PTSD-flavored beer). First, Heather called Meghan to let her know Vicki was at the Palm Springs hospital, so could Meghan please just abandon waiting for Shannon Beador‘s arrival at La Quinta to rush over and check on Vicki.
Tamra is trying to organize a trip for Eddie’s birthday, except none of her fancy pants (or wannabe fancy pants) friends are willing to spend three days riding ATVS around sand dunes and living in trailers. How is Shannon Beador going to manage in a place with no crystals embedded in the walls. Or without “hospital-grade air”!?
Last night’s Real Housewives Of Orange County was about creating memories. For some that means a south of the border, borderline sex tape featuring guacamole and skinny dipping; for others, it’s forced entrapment of your friends and family in a deceased talk show host’s dessert estate. So everyone be quiet and let Shannon Beador and Vicki Gunvalson imagine worlds of fabricated perfection!
Shannon is on cloud nine. She is so euphoric she has forgotten how to speak Spanish – even though she placed second in the country on the National Spanish Exam? Que?! She better grab her flashcards, cause she is headed to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico for a re-honeymoon! Of course no Shannon Beador expedition is complete without Shannon Beador accessories!