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RHOM

adriana de moura

Last night on The Real Housewives of Miami, Adriana de Moura turned off her co-stars by sending out her wedding invitations via email.  And not just any old E-vite…one with detailed instructions on what to wear, what not to wear and an inspiration board to get them started! 

Adriana took to her Bravo blog to defend her wedding decisions, "Welcome to the 21st century! Yes, I had an Evite for my wedding, because we all live on our computers, tablets, smart phones, etc. Who needs a printed invite when nobody cares about that anymore? Besides we need to save trees and think of our impact on the environment as well."  Fellow Real Housewife NeNe Leakes apparently agrees with her, as she did the same thing.

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rhom-recap-marysol-lea

Last night on Real Housewives of Miami silicone hit the fan between Marysol Patton and Lea Black. That old storyline again! This time the ladies were arguing over whether or not Lea ignored Mama Elsa while she was in the hospital. 

Joanna Krupa and Romain finally had a breakthrough in their relationship. Adriana de Moura continued to be insane by insisting her wedding guests dress pure and innocent as angels, newborn fawns, and daisies at her sham re-wedding, which is anything but fresh as the first snow. 

Joanna has Lisa Hochstein over for dinner. Joanna doesn't cook or use dishes so she serves sushi and soup out of the restaurant takeout boxes. I was getting the BPA heebie-jeebies watching them drink miso out of the big plastic cartons. The food doesn't really matter since the wine is the main course. 

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The Real Housewives of Miami - Season 3

For every bout of bad behavior, every Bravo star has a sob story and tiny violin to play to explain it away.  Real Housewives of Miami's Adriana de Moura is no exception.  Listen, I'm not discounting a troubled youth or a sad home life or awful relationships which lead to low self-esteem, but don't we all have these same issues on some level or another?

Where else should these "explanations" be aired but on their Bravo blog?  Adriana uses hers this week to share why she has such trust issues and why meeting with the minister was so important to her and her husband fiance Frederic.  

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real-housewives-of-new-jersey-season-5-finale-joe-teresa-giudice

The reality TV viewer numbers for Sunday and Monday are in.

On Sunday, the season finale of Real Housewives of New Jersey, as well as Joe and Teresa Giudice's sit down with Andy Cohen, attracted 2.502 million viewers. The season average thus far is 2.398 million. 

Keeping Up with the Kardashians suffered a considerable drop – with only 1.799 million fans tuning in – following its four week hiatus. Season two of Hollywood Exes continues to disappoint. 581,000 viewers watched this week.

On Monday, 653,000 devoted fans watched Joanna and Romain's awkward sexy times on Real Housewives of Miami this week. RHOM lost 400,000+ viewers since mid-September and 700,000+ since the season three premiere. 

Basketball Wives, which garnered 1.816 million viewers, and RHONJ were the only two shows to see an increase this week.  The relationship drama on Teen Mom 3 attracted 1.213 million viewers. That's down from last week's 1.429.

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The Real Housewives of Miami - Season 3

It seems some ladies on Real Housewives of Miami want to stage a coup and overthrow the Mayor of Miami, Lea Black

"The bus that's running over me this week is leaking hot air, not water," Lea announces in her Bravo blog before launching into a discussion about the devious deeds of her castmates. 

First up: Adriana de Moura! "Adriana still takes no responsibility for anything, she blames Frederic for the non-wedding marriage and even blames me for her problems with Joanna [Krupa]," Lea begins.

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rhom-recap-dress-burning

Last night on Real Housewives of Miami bridges to the past were burned as everyone focused on getting over it, moving forward, and embracing the positive. Except for Lenny Hochstein – he embraced the liposuction and actualized his dream of looking like Romain Zago of being a swimsuit model. 

Things begin with Adriana de Moura and Joanna Krupa meeting for breakfast to discuss why they hate each other. Joanna stuck to non-alcoholic beverages and that ensured that no eggs were thrown in anyone's face (boring!) despite Adriana being an hour late. In the end Adriana apologizes for calling Joanna "Ho-anna" and insinuating she was an escort, although she tries to blame the whole thing on Lea Black! All is good… for now! Personally I don't know how Joanna resisted the urge to knock that goofy white hat off Adriana's head. 

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lisa-hochstein

A Housewife will hawk just about anything!  From cookbooks to hair care, these ladies are all about putting their name on a product.  However, what about the stuff that they use before they put their names on something? When fans compliment these women on their hair or their skin or their donkey booty, the housewives got these from a particular product…and not one that they created themselves!  

It's only after they are recognized for this attribute that some handler believes it's a good idea for said housewife to create her own line of butt-lifting underwear/press-on nails/horse shampoo/insert product here.  Am I right?  Let's take Lisa Hochstein from Real Housewives of Miami, shall we?

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lisa-hochstein-karent-sierra-rhom (5)

It pays to have connections!  Lisa Hochstein chipped her tooth at 1 a.m. and thankfully she has friends in all the right places – Karent Sierra DDS to the rescue. 

Lisa chipped the tooth at her friend Carrie's birthday celebration and her former Real Housewives of Miami co-star Karent took the emergency call, offering to meet Lisa at her office.  Lisa shared Tweets and photos of the traumatic morning, "@karentsierra and I at 1 am in her office fixing my chipped tooth. I don't follow instructions well lol #acid #dentist #drkarentsierra this should be on #rhom.  Came to my rescue at 1am! #loveher #goodfriend best #dentist ever". 

Karent fixed her up and was glad to see Lisa's "hillbilly smile" gone.  "Happy to have been able to take care of my friend @lisahochstein #dentistsaregoodfriendstohave.  Looking fabulous Miss Lisa! No more hillbilly smile  @lisahochstein #smile #teeth #emergencydentist #dentalspa".  (How many hashtags can they cram in one Tweet?)

This is why it's important to never burn those reality TV bridges, ladies!

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