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Rob Kardashian

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It's not a great day to be a Kardashian…although I guess that begs the question, "Is it ever?"  Now that Kim Kardashian is divorced from Kris Humphries, many thought it would be a matter of minutes before tiny rapper Kanye West put a ring on it.  However, now there are whisperings that they won't be announcing their engagement any time soon. #poutyface 

If you think things are stinky for Kim these days, try being Rob!  Not only is does the world know he's genitally challenged with a tanking sock business, but now he's getting sued by the paparazzo he allegedly assaulted a while back who snapped pics of him changing into gym clothes in a parking garage.  Bless his heart.

Thankfully, the family's former nanny is penning a memoir that sounds incredibly fake and boring paints the family in a much better light.  I wonder how much they are paying for her to do that?

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Diesel+Edun's launch Party

Happy weekend, readers!  I hope your week was better than Rob Kardashian's.  Poor guy was advertising his itty bitty woes to anyone who would listen, and now his one attempt at getting his mother's attention entering the world of Kardashian business ventures isn't going as well as planned.  Yikes!

At least things are looking up for sister Kim thanks to boyfriend Kanye West.  She's even apparently scored an invite (thanks to the tiny rapper) to the Met Gala after being blacklisted by Anna Wintour last year.  Now, whatever will she wear?  That's the bigggest fear question!

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Holy TMI, Batman!  Rob Kardashian is taking a page out of his famewhoring sister's playbook (yes, I'm looking at you, Kim!) and giving the world a heaping dose of too much information!  I can never unread what I just read…and now you won't be able to either!

If you want, you can blame Ryan Seacrest for feeling the need to do a sit down special with the entire Kardashian/Jenner klan, but really, the brunt of the blame should be placed on pimp momager Kris Jenner's shoulders.  She's taught her offspring that it's "the more ridiculous, the better" when it comes to garnering media attention.  I warn you, what you are about to read isn't pretty, and it has to do with what weight gain has done to poor Rob's member.  {Shudder}

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Kim Kardashian seen leaving court after Kris Humphries divorce hearing

Happy weekend, readers!  I've got some pretty phenomenal news for y'all!  Guess what?  The Kardashians never do anything wrong.  Crazy, I know!  All the stuff we read about them is lies.  Kris Jenner is not trying to find the next highest paycheck for her daughters and Rob.  They are just a normal family who enjoys spending a little time in the public eye.  The krew would be more than happy to maintain their privacy.  Ahahahahaha!  It was hard to even type that!

You know how I know this ahmahzing information?  It's straight from the pimpmomager herself!  Kris is letting everyone know that what we read in the tabloids–like the writings of her late ex-husband's journal–are totally false.  In other news, daughter Kim Kardashian's dicorce proceedings are moving forward as planned after her attorneys failed to reach a settlement agreement with those of Kris Humphries.  The above picture is her leaving court…what, praytell, is she wearing??

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I'm thinking about using my legal and blogging backgrounds to start a special kind of celebrity-inspired law school.  Contracts, torts, even civil procedure could be worlds more exciting if you're studying cases based in tabloid craziness…and goodness knows there are enough celebrity legal spats to provide copious amounts of study materials.  I specifically remember studying a case in my wills and trusts class which involved a troubled stripper turned Guess model as she vied for her much older husband's estate after his passing.  Ring any bells?  I'd even invite Harvey Weinstein to be a guest lecturer. 

Of course, all 1Ls would have to take Kardashian Law.  Think about it…the class could cover everything from employment to divorce to defamation.  Kris Humphries could teach part of the course in his off-season!  Speaking of Kris, we've got some news on his divorce proceedings from Kim.  Also, if you recall, Kris Jenner recently filed a lawsuit against her ex husband's widow Ellen Kardashian for copyright infringement, claiming that Ellen sold portions of Robert Kardashian, Sr.'s private journals which were willed exclusively to his children.  This family is a plethora of legal insanity, and I have more to share with you after the jump!

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I am not sure if I know any family that loves famewhoring and lawsuits more than those krazy Kardashians.  I think they'd literally shrivel up if they weren't constantly surrounded by paparazzi and tabloid fodder and legal pleadings and vapidness.  In the divorce that has drawn out longer than the actual marriage, Kris Humphries will finally have his day in court.  However, Kim Kardashian won't be there…she's got perfume to promote, y'all!  Priorities.  Duh.

In other Kardashian/Jenner news, the family that fames together files claims together (sorry, that was bad).  Remember when Robert Kardashian's widow sold his diary?  Yeah, that's coming back to bite her in the arse.  

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Newsflash!  There is apparently one member of the Kardashian family who doesn't like to photographed by the paparazzi!  Even weirder?  This Kardashian is vehemently opposed to having pictures taken in situations where clothing may be optional.  I can't wrap my head around it either!

While his sisters seem to bask in photographic attention, Rob Kardashian was recently fighting mad to be the center of one pap's focus.  His siblings appear to love being photographed–the less clothing the better!–but that mantra doesn't ring true for the only boy in the krew.  A pap snapped pictures of Rob changing for the gym, and Rob was quick to steal her camera's memory card.  Yikes!

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kim

Another day, another math conundrum in the realm of the Kardashians.  Kim Kardashian is helping us train our brains with some weighty word problems.  The Keeping up with the Kardashians star, who is preggers with Kanye West's baby (duh!), is slyly revealing just how many pounds she's gained.  Using terms like "only half" and "60 pounds off," she is causing my brain to fry with the computations.  

When she's not making the public subtract and divide, she's being coy about Kimye Jr.'s potential moniker and how she wishes she had some junk food cravings.  Pregnancy is the one time that she has the excuse to eat whatever she wants, but all the baby seems to desire is rabbit food.  Poor Kim just kan't katch a break!  

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