Well, surprise, surprise Vanderpump Rules fans: Jax Taylor did NOT cheat on Brittany Cartwright! Oh, I’m just kidding – of course he did! I mean Jax probably even did it more than once actually, because Brittany found some false eyelashes in her bathroom once and they didn’t belong to her, or Jax, or Tom Schwartz (who sometimes, when he cries, likes to feel the soft flutter of gently moistened pony lashes on his tender cheeks. It’s comforting. Like a little blanket for his Cabbage Patch Kids face).
Jax apparently cheated with – and potentially knocked up – Brittany’s friend Faith Stowers, who confessed all of this to James Kennedy. Of course – why not confess to Jax’s mortal enemy? James is levitating with glee at this trashy news. Jax vehemently denies it.
It’s the most wonderful time of the year! And I’m not just referring to the holiday season. Vanderpump Rulesis back on TV and I couldn’t be happier. The first episode of Season 6 did not disappoint. Obviously the major story line is that Faith missed her period after she allegedly had sex with is Jax Taylorin front of a sleeping senior citizen that she was supposed to be taking care of, but plenty of other things happened.
Last night was the season premiere of Vanderpump Rules. SIX LONG SEASONS I will have been recapping this show, and six long seasons I will have loved every minute of it. Well, OK, not every minute, but a lot of minutes. Last night did not disappoint on this rollercoaster to hell and back. Complete with costumes! But still can the writers over there get a new story besides cheating?!
At SUR, Tom Sandovalis still slinging drinks while dreaming of a less sloppy future. A Tomtastic future with sexy TVs and pot-tinis. Yes, you heard that right: pot-tinis, as in marijuana-laced mixed drinks. That sounds like a YouTube horror story about what teens are getting into to these days.
Lisa Vanderpump is moving forward with Tom-Tom, a restaurant centered around the Toms, and for the low introductory price of $100,000 dollars, paid in installments of $9.99 per month (for life) – taxes and fees apply – the real life Toms can become 10% partners in this glorious venture. One might think old (I used that word intentionally) Tom 1 would be grateful. Instead he is besieged with angst!
The dynamics of the Vanderpump Rules cast are constantly changing. It’s hard to keep track of who everyone’s friends, enemies, and sexual partners are, but no matter what happens, they all seem to forgive each other eventually- somehow. And then the cycle of confusing friendships continues again.
Season 6 hasn’t even premiered yet, but we should all be on the lookout for some drama between Jax Taylorand Kristen Doute since Jax talked a lot of shit about her in a recent interview.
The Vanderpump Rules stars celebrated the premiere of the show’s sixth season in the best way they know how: by partying. In my eyes, the real party starts on December 4, when the first episode ends on Bravo. Then again, I was looking through Instagram wishing that I was invited to the actual party that they had.
The party went down at Adults Only, a bar in Los Angeles, and it looked like the perfect place for this wild cast. Apparently, it’s one of those bars with a secret entrance, and it looks like an old school adult movie store complete with naked photos plastering the walls.