Scheana Marie
Growing up is sooooo hard to do. Especially when you're a 32-year-old male model perfecting the dilettante lifestyle. Such is the case of Jax Taylor, who everyday listens to Rod Stewart's anthem "Forever Young" on his iPod while slicing lime twists for the perfect cocktail. But alas fair Jax – everyone has a moment when they wake up Maggie Mae.
Worst of all is that Jax let his people down. His followers, ready to decamp in the jungle without their eyeliner for him, were crestfallen.
In the tangled web of Vanderpump Rules, Jax is trying to rekindle his relationship with Stassi Schroeder and to do that he's taking their dog shopping. Stassi wants all remnants of that flea Laura-Leigh exterminated. Over talk of new leashes, Stassi then turns her laser devil eyes on Jax and he is forced to beg and plead with her not to exterminate him as well.
Stassi and Jax, the endless tale of emotional f**kwittism. Is buying a new dog accessory some sort of break-up rite of passage now?
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Stassi Schroeder Says People Either Love Her Or Hate Her On Vanderpump Rules – And She Doesn’t Care!
Vanderpump Rules' resident villainess (who's watched Mean Girls waay, waay too many times in an attempt to craft her perfect "character"), Stassi Schroeder is talking reality TV, why it seems to be her only career goal, and what it's like to be so maligned by the public. I mean she's just being herself! Don't hate her cause she's beautiful.
Given her long past in reality TV (Stassi has appeared on the now defunct Queen Bees and the Amazing Race), she explains she was prepared to 'be herself' on camera! Oh that is not something I would admit, m'dear! "I know that like, you just have to be yourself. You can't hide anything. If there's something you don't want to come out, it's going to come out. I made the decision to be myself and people don't like it, it's not my problem," she tells Reality Wanted.
Stassi also touches on her relationship to Jax Taylor, and his abrupt about-face in psycho switching when he started dating Laura-Leigh (which Stassi claims he only did to annoy her).
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Oh good lord with this show. I really think the cast of Vanderpump Rules should just bottle their tears and sell them as a cocktail at SUR. I mean someone is always crying! In every scene: sob, sob, sob, sob… If Diamond Water can become a thing, Teary Vodka can.
So last night Jax Taylor proved that he is just as self-absorbed as Stassi Schroeder (what did we expect from a male model!) when he dumped rebound girlfriend Laura-Leigh of the Minnie Mouse helium voice and meth addiction after her AA meeting. Yep, that happened – although he told her they could keep having sex.
And in the same episode Stassi showed why she has no friends and is always getting shizzed upon by boyfriends; because she treats people like CRAP! And we all know you treat people how you expect to be treated. Stassi, Princess of Low Self-Esteem. She wears transparent well, doesn't she?
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Somebody needs to revoke Jax Taylor's Food Handler's card because our pretty male model made a serious faux pas on last night's Vanderpump Rules with ladylove of the minute Laura Leigh!
Everyone's favorite little reincarnated Minnie Mouse whose voice floats and squeaks with aplomb christened SUR with Jax in a little late-night bathroom hooking up. ON THE FLOOR. Of the VIP bathroom. According to the security guard, he walked in and saw Jax and Laura Leigh trousers down, getting busy. He promptly phoned Ken, who promptly called a PR meeting where he informed the flabbergasted Lisa Vanderpump about extracurricular activities in the workplace. Oh dear – what. a. mess. Literally and figuratively.
I have two things to say about this: 1) Does LL seriously want to be thought of as the gross desperate girl who gets busy on a public restroom floor? Even Britney Spears isn't that dirty.
2) Did Lisa seriously let that get featured on television? Image problem is right! And apparently this is a bit of a trend with LL because the next night she and Jax are out to dinner and they slip into the employee bathroom to reenact their magical moment. Where are the police with public indecency citations when we need them?
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