Scheana Marie

Katie Maloney and Tom 2 get engaged

Last night on Vanderpump Rules, Tom Schwartz finally took the ring OFF the string and placed it on Katie Maloney‘s finger. Don’t worry – he’ll still be forever tied down to Tom 1

In cold hard realities, the “A” Tom 1 drunkenly tattooed on his ass stands for Adulting. Tom 1 spent 15 drunken minutes getting inked, but now wants his 15 minutes back. Ariana Madix escorts him to Dat Tat Off, the world’s most professional tattoo removal parlor, which is coincidentally managed by Kristen Doute‘s Machiavellian friend, who happens to be wearing black and white stripes. Tom 1 – forever imprisoned by Kristen somehow! Tom went there in the hopes of getting a ‘friend-ish’ discount. 

If they were a movie, it would be called, She’s [He’s] Just Not That Over You (The Tom and Kristen forever dysfunction story). True to form, Kristen’s friend is eager to view the self-inflicted damage Ariana caused Tom to enact. 


Tom 1 freaks out, Tom 2 eats Pad Thai

On Vanderpump Rules there was bacon, and asses, and giant shrieky man-tantrums. Also Kristen Doute tried to pretend she had matured. 

I have a major bone to pick with this show. Let’s call it a reality check shall we, since this is supposed to be a reality show and all. Why are they still trying to make Kristen happen? Honestly – would any ‘real’ friend expect you to go on a birthday vacation with your crazy ex-girlfriend? NO!

Once Kristen and James Kennedy split, Kristen lost her place on this show – we’re now just seeing a regurgitated storyline of everyone fake-forgiving Kristen and unconvincingly acting as if they want to be her friend so Bravo can justify the antics she may cause. It’s super-phony. James is the new crazy-ass – let’s embrace that and hook Stassi Schroeder and Kristen up with a little Pump Rules Scorned Spinoff instead. Because Kristen pretending she wants forgiveness and has really changed; she’s too bad an actress to convince anyone of that. And furthermore her hitting the club for Jax Taylor to teach her how to avoid players while she makes creepy-Hunchback of Notre Dame faces was cringeworthy. Likewise I am tired of watching Tom 1 and Ariana Madix freakout, whine, and tantrum over Kristen. 


Reality TV Stars Holiday Pics

Let’s see how our favorite reality TV stars celebrated the holiday… some were nice, some were naughty, and some were their everyday famewhore selves that we love to snark on so very much.

Above: Gretchen Rossi shared, “Merry Christmas Everyone!!! Us being total and complete dorks, me in my hello kitty p.j.’s (of course in pink) and Slade in his super silly Santa shorts, with our 3 fur babies. Rest of the family is headed over now. #HappyHolidays #MerryChristmas”

Below you’ll find pics from Bethenny Frankel, Kim Richards, LeAnn Rimes, Kylie Jenner, Chelsea Houska, Yolanda Foster, Porsha Williams, Fredrik Eklund, Katie Maloney, and more.


Ariana Madix turns 30

Last night on Vanderpump Rules it was a birthday bonanza! First Ariana Madix channeled her inner child with a potent cocktail of tequila, tears, and trampolines. Then Peter Madrigal channeled his inner manhood with a potent cock-tail of bulldozers, booze, and booty touching in Vegas. Aaaahhh… ain’t nothing like a little boy bonding.

Ariana throws the most major of epic pseudo-kids birthday parties. It was pretty much exactly the same party Kyle Richards throws for Portia, minus the Fat Burger truck, plus an open bar. Ariana rented a bounce house, trampoline, piñata, silly string, face painters, etc. She’s also wearing a bizarre unicorn horn, dangerously protruding from her forehead. It distracts from her side-eye, because it’s like a very pointy third eye. A very pointy third eye aimed directly at Tom 1‘s shenanigans. Concerns: what happens when one mixes a unicorn horn with an inflatable bounce house? Somebody’s bubble is about to get burst!


Tom and Tom flub a business meeting with LVP Sangria

If I were Jax Taylor‘s girlfriend Brittany, after watching last night’s Vanderpump Rules, I’d be breaking up with him. But she probably got into the business of dating Jax by watching Vanderpump Rules, so I’ll assume she’s not surprised by his general assiness and lies. 

Before we get into all the drama Lisa Vanderpump meets an early 30-something woman named Arielle with priorities. Imagine! Arielle volunteers with homeless youth (aged 18 – 23) who live in a shelter. Arielle reached out to Lisa and Ken on Facebook because many of these kids have never eaten in a fancy restaurant and have always wanted to. Lisa and Ken of course say yes. 

Now, drama. Lala Kent did not hook up with Jax after PRIDE – but not for lack of trying! Lala asks if he wants to get a drink, so Jax pretends he’s not really together with his girlfriend Brittany. Out of sight, out of mind; in sight, in Jax’s bed!


Reality TV Stars Shannon and David Beador

Our favorite reality TV stars cannot get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to social media to share even more of their lives with us. And we would not have it any other way. Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite snapshots and selfies from this week. Enjoy.

Above: Real Housewives of Orange County star Shannon Beador shared, “Happy 51st birthday to my husband, my soulmate, my everything… I love you! #notacougarfornextfourmonths”

Below you’ll find pics from Draya Michele, Heather Dubrow, Kyle Richards, Yandy Smith, Vicki Gunvalson, Bethenny Frankel, Gigi Hadid, and more.


23rd Annual Veterans Holiday Celebration -

If those of you in the Los Angeles area felt a little safer this week but you didn’t know why, it’s because Kristen Doute has been in NYC all week.

The sometimes a little unhinged Vanderpump Rules star appeared on Watch What Happens Live, dangled her leg over a balcony while drinking, and stopped by New York Live. On New York Live, Kristen weighed in on Lala Kent and James Kennedy‘s relationship and shared thoughts on Scheana Marie‘s soft core porn “Femme Fatales” video that came to light this week.


Lala and James

Vanderpump Rules lives by its own code of ethics. That code being, if you don’t get caught it’s not cheating, and if you don’t get caught cheating with your friend’s boyfriend, you’re still a good friend. Lisa Vanderpump needs to quit re-educating with sommeliers and instead try educating her employees on HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS. Like maybe Communications 101? 

Also, I owe Kristen Doute an apology. Sort of. I used to believe James Kennedy was a super-douchey arrogant jerk because Kristen is so insane, but now I realize it was just a case of Like Attracts Like. They’re both total jerks, who, luckily for everyone else, had found each other to terrorize. Now that James and Kristen have split, James is inflicting his assholery on everyone else. Tom 1 and Ariana Madix are “Adulting,” James is instead “Douchebagging Extreme!” Run Lala, run!


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