TheBachelor folk are not about to let us forget that Sean Lowe's riveting personality half-naked body looks ah-mazing. While working out and taking a shower, Sean talks about his second chance at love… on this amazing journey… to meet his future wife. The Bachelor needs a new script.
Sean and his bachelorettes go on dates this week! Chris Harrison explains the dating process to the 19 remaining ladies – First Rose Tierra, Wishing Well Desiree, OCD AshLee, Sexy Selma, Back Flips Robyn, Tries Too Hard Brooke, Lipstick Jackie, Kurly Katie, Sweet Sarah, Single Mom Diana, Mean Mugging Catherine, Poker Dealer Leslie, Awkward Pause Amanda, Desperate in D.C. Lesley, Ben Reject Kacie, Model Kristy, Handshake Daniella, Tears Taryn, and Drunk Bride Lindsay – and adds that Sean is the most sincere Bachelorever.
Chris places the first date card on the coffee table, raises his hands in the air, and slowly backs out of the room… BRING ON THE CRAZY!
Kristy grabs the card, hoping to see her name on it, but it goes to Sarah. The date card reads, "Are you ready to fall in love today?" Everyone goes awwww and then wishes they, too, had only one arm. Oh, come on… you know the thought seeped into their catty heads. In all seriousness, I loved Sarah last week, so I'm excited about Sean's choice.
Sometimes my reality gets skewed. It's been skewed as of late. I'm bewildered. The light of musicals, Southern belle charm, and quick wit wrapped in a tiny little package has disappointed me. Yet, I still can't blame her. I feel as if she's been brainwashed. I can't think of another logical explanation.
I'll just come right out and say it. I've heard the rumors, and I've read the gossip, but I so didn't want to believe it was true. But we now have confirmation. Sigh. It seems that everyone's favorite multi-talented spitfire little cupcake Kristin Chenoweth is, in fact, dating former Bachelor alum and d-bag pilot Jake Pavelka. When did the world go so awry? I'd hoped that she was his beard, but it doesn't seem like that is the case. I don't know what to believe anymore. Gracious.
This was a good week for our favorite reality shows! It seems that everyone is getting back into the swing of 2013, and with a routine comes our favorite old habits…watching some of the most fantastically trashy television series known to man.
Chris Harrison is on hand, as well, to keep every single most dramatic rose ceremony running smoothly. Not on hand? Emily Maynard. She broke Sean's heart on the Bachelorette and, for the sake of my sanity, needs to stay far away from this season.
Sean has fully recovered from his heartbreak and is ready to try again on the Bachelor. Clearly, he's a fool. He says the idea of possibly meeting his future wife during this journey (drink up, my friends) is kind of exciting and kind of intimidating.
Sean adds, "I want the end result. I want to protect my woman. I want to love my woman. I want to honor her. I want to love her with everything I have, and I want to be the best possible man I can be for her. I want to be rich in love."
Because ABC doesn't completely hate me,Arie Luyendyk, Jr. stops by Sean's pad to help him prepare for what is to come. Mr. Holy Hotness schools Sean on how to properly kiss a woman: Eye contact. Use your hands. Touch her hair. Touch her face. Tease her with your tongue. No lizard tongue. Use your whole body. #coldshower
Curse you, Arie, for not signing up for this train wreck of a show solely for my entertainment.
Sean Lowe's season of The Bachelor will be upon us before we can say "made for TV love never lasts!" ABC has recently released the lovely ladies who will be vying for Sean's affections this season – and now they're releasing the trailer for the upcoming season.
Chris Harrison has promised this is not a "let's get drunk, let's get naked" kind of a season, which kinda defeats the purpose of watching the show. I mean the good parts are all the desperate famewhores working overtime to throw themselves at some dude who will propose to them for his own famehoochie aspirations.
Ashley and J.P. will be following in the footsteps of the original Bachelorette couple Trista and Ryan Sutter. Not only are they getting married, but they're doing so in a two hour televised ABC special. Is that part of their contract? #rhetoricalquestions Also, we have some spoilers, so if you don't want to skip ahead 9+ episode's of Sean's Bachelor season and make your own betting pools, consider yourself forewarned.