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Sister Wives Recap

sister wives

Whatever is the story line for Sister Wives going to be now that Robyn, Janelle, and Christine have gotten their homes in their cul-de-sac commune? Can the season survive on Kody Brown's hair and Meri's whining alone?  

It's moving day for Christine, and it's sheer chaos.  Janelle is also moving the remainder of her things out of her rental. Madison is excited to have the whole family back together so that she can escape to another family home on the cul-de-sac in the event that her brothers are annoying the crap out of her.  She also thinks it will be great for her younger siblings to be able to play together more often.

Meri still has no news on her house, and she and Mariah are upset.  Kody's hair and facial tan make him look like a crazed snow boarder, and I'm confused by his vest…in a good way, of course.   The Brown clan has decided to put off celebrating Christmas for a week in hopes that Meri will be in her new digs by then.

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sister wives

What do you call Kody Brown making eighteen thousand walk-throughs of his new cul-de-sac compound?  Why last night's episode of Sister Wives of course!  Janelle, Christine, and Robyn are all set to move in, but poor Meri just can't seem to catch a break with the loan underwriters.  Shucks!

It's another walk through, and the homes are finally landscaped.  Christine gushes about her new kitchen, and Robyn teases that it sounds like Christine is describing the love of her life when waxing poetic about her appliances.  Sounds about right.  I'd prefer granite countertops to a flaxen haired polygamist wearing head-to-toe denim.  Christine is stressing about packing, and apparently she thinks her children will be motivated by copious amounts of baby talk.

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sister wives 2

Last night's Sister Wives was lacking all the whine that has been present for last few weeks.  Thankfully, I wasn't lacking in wine.  Sometimes it takes a little pinot noir for me to watch Robyn, Meri, Christine, and Janelle fight for Kody Brown's affections.  Hey, I get it…that hair would make me a fool for love too!

Robyn has got to be over the moon.  Not two short weeks ago, no one wanted to be involved in My Sister Wives Closet, but now business-minded Janelle realizes it could be the perfect avenue to create a line of modest exercise gear.  Christine is also hopping on the bandwagon after she got the tragic news that realtor actually have to do work, so that job prospect is out of the question.  She wants to market the business with some t-shirts, but Kody doesn't want to cheapen the company with fumpy gimmicks.  For someone who didn't want to be a part of this gig, Kody sure is vocal.  Robyn jokes that Kody needs to put on his big boy panties.  Has he done something different with his beard?  Dead sexy.

Janelle is getting frustrated with the plateau in her weight loss goals.  While she was consistently losing weight in the beginning, the numbers aren't getting lower now.  Janelle counts her calories and works out an hour a day, six days a week.  Her trainer convinces her to bring in her scale.  He wonders why Janelle is focused on the number on the scale when now she's running and getting stronger.  He makes her take a sledgehammer to the scale, and Janelle feels liberated.  She then models some pants that are now several sizes too big, and she realizes that she is making major progress.

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sister wives

I can't apologize enough for being late to the game with last week's debut of Sister Wives.  Sometimes, I pine so much for Kody Brown's glorious mane that I lose sight of everything else…even the show itself.  Of course, the premiere showed Robyn and Meri fight for My Sister Wives Closet when Kody, Janelle, and Christine aren't necessarily jiving with the "hobby."  In a nutshell, the baubles bomb at a local jewelry expo, and we are left to wonder–yet again–where the Browns will get the money for their dream cul-de-sac.

Last night's episode gave viewers a peek into what the ladies do in their daily lives when it's not their night to spend with Kody.  {heebie jeebies}  Kody also laments that he feels like a constant vagabond skipping from one far-flung rental home to another.  Janelle is hard at work in the gym, and she's starting to see some progress with her weight loss goal.  While she feels kind of like a single mom, she hasn't totally hated exploring her independence away from the family chaos.  You know she's going to be the first to cut and run from this disaster.

Robyn is getting on Kody and the other wives for not being as involved in My Sister Wives Closet.  Kody is concerned that people will mistake his attempts to sell trinket jewelry as patrolling for wife number five.  Christine and Janelle are not on board…they really want to pursue their real estate careers.  Janelle's kids are feeling the pressure of the family's stress, and Janelle is breaking up fights left and right while Kody tries to relax.  There is kicking and screaming and door slamming and video game confiscation and swearing.  Perhaps TLC should consider a Super Nanny crossover?  Janelle calls for reinforcement in the form Goldilocks while the boys rumble.  As Kody tries to discipline his boys, he explains that he often feels like a visitor and has less credibility with his family.  Ding, ding, ding!  We have a winner, ladies and gentlemen!

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sister wives 2

Last night was the season finale of Sister Wives followed by a family interview.  We watched Logan head off to college, and we were teased with a Kody Brown haircut.  I can't say I'm sad to see it end…for now.  

Christine is freaking out about the closings of the homes.  Kody reveals that the family has yet to qualify for their loans.  Um, why are they doing this again if they can't afford it?  Kody and his wives head to the bank to pick out their options for their homes.  One at a time, the ladies pour over carpet colors and countertops.  Robyn is up first, and she's quick to make her decisions.  Meri is up next, and she's already over budget.  Meri is stressed about the money, but she still wants to see any potential upgrades.  Are you kidding me?  Kody is quickly getting frustrated because he thinks that a washer and dryer is way more important than special countertops.  Meri is on the defensive, and she's over it.  She leaves, allowing her sister wives to pick their options.  

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kody brown

Last night was a Sister Wives' road trip from hell.  I got totally stressed out just watching it.  Kody Brown's behavior rivaled that of his youngest children, and we learned that Meri Brown and Robyn Sullivan-Brown's great-great-(and great) grandfathers were both hanging out in Nauvoo, Illinois at the same time.  Perhaps that's why they have such a connection?  Christine Brown fancied herself a Chris Brown with her impromptu stand-up routines during the sofa interviews, and I think that Janelle Brown said maybe three words.  She was probably still traumatized from the road trip. 

The episode begins as the family is celebrating Logan's birthday.  Kody announces that everyone is going to file into two RVs for a road trip to Nauvoo, Illinois which is where the Church of Latter Day Saints gained popularity.  While the Browns aren't a part of that denomination, they are looking forward to learning more about their Mormon forefathers.  Needless to say, the teenagers aren't super thrilled at the idea of driving three days to Illinois to learn their church history, while the younger kids just hear "RVs." 

Hunter and Logan manage to get out of the pilgrimage thanks to prior plans and football camp.  The teen girls are beyond jealous of their brothers' good fortune.  Logan and Hunter aren't even pretending they're upset to missing this debacle.  Christine and Robyn will be staying in hotels while the other ladies will be bunking in the RVs.

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Last night we were treated to a double dose of Sister Wives, but it wasn't really more of Kody Brown's lion mane.  TLC just gave us two thirty minute episodes instead of one hour-long program.  There's drama and Kody tears…it's not funny.  So why am I laughing as I type?  Perhaps because when I typed it, I didn't realize that Kody was crying over the loss of a dog…I am a horrible person.  I am so saddened that the Browns have to deal with putting down their twelve-year-old family member. 

On the first episode, the family meets to go over the different options for the homes.  Granite countertops?  Christine Brown is quick to pick her back splashes and cabinets, but Meri Brown and Robyn Sullivan Brown are slow to make a decision.  Meri is willing to get another job so she can have what she wants in the house.  Seriously, Meri?  You're too good for sliding glass doors?  She really isn't willing to budge on what she wants in her home even though she's over budget.  I love that Christine won't offer up any of her extra cash even though she comes in under budget.  I totally get that Meri shouldn't be punished budget wise just because she wasn't able to have more kids, but on the flip side, she should be thanking her lucky stars she's getting a ginormous home for herself while her sister wives will have kids doubling up in bedrooms.  I normally really like Meri, but she needs to get over herself.

Thanks Meri, for making me tear up by showing me an aging, sick dog.  It breaks my heart.  I'm such a dog person, and I've lost two dogs when I was growing up to old age, and one who was hit by a car as an adult.  I just let my four-legged child get up on the sofa with me to watch this show because all of this dog story line is so sad.  Meri and Kody call in all the children to say good-bye to Drake, and the kids are bawling crying and taking pictures with the sweet pooch. 

Over at Janelle Brown's house, it's time to hit the gym.  She is up at quarter till five in the morning, and she's heading to meet with her trainer.  I think it's very brave of Janelle to share her weight loss struggles.  Christine is very proud of her sister wife's dedication.  Janelle's trainer is is not only working on her body, but he's also trying to help her change her eating behavior.  She is very determined.

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The teens on last night's Sister Wives got a bit of a reality check.  Maddie, Logan, and Aspyn are volunteering for an organization that helps families who want to leave the polygamist lifestyle.  They are traveling back to Utah to paint a house for a family to move into after leaving the LDS community.  Kody Brown and his hair hope that Aspyn will remember that plural marriage is a good thing.  Christine isn't on board with this trip because she wonders if there are times when people are are "helped" when they really don't want to necessarily leave.

Kody and the wives are optimistic that the teens will remember how different their family is from the families they are about to see.  Maddie can't fathom the abuse that some people in plural marriages suffer, and Aspyn is worried that she won't be able to relate to the victims.  Right away they meet a polygamist escapee Kollene who readily admits she wants to take out some of her anger on the Browns.  Kody is upset that Warren Jeffs has painted his lifestyle in such a bad light. 

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