Unfortunately, I can’t go back to an easier time when memories of “go-go juice” and “sketti” served in the finest of Cool-Whip containers meant that life was simple, back when one’s only concerns were exposing forklift foot if a water park’s rip-roarin’ slide proved too much for a pedicured ankle sock or whether a scheduling conflict with the local railroad would create a loud, late night train situation. Nope, I can’t hop in my Kuntry Store purchased time machine and unlearn all I now know about the folks of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. Thanks June Shannon.
When TLC’s cash cow was at the height of popularity, the line was clearly drawn before those who (like me) found the family’s ridiculous antics equally endearing and disgusting and those who thought the show’s fans were verging on insanity. Sure, the six-year-old beauty queen wannabe Alana Thompson was sassy to the point of rude, but her one-liners were everything. The family was open about their past struggles (June, a grandmother in her mid-thirties has four daughters from various incarcerated men), but who am I to judge? Plus, what’s not to love about Sugar Bear?
June shared on Facebook that despite negative reports, she’s not having any problems with Jessica! Instead, after the former Here Comes Honey Boo Boo family relocated to Hampton, GA to cosplay The Beverly Hillbillies in a big new house, Jessica decided to remain in McIntyre to focus on graduating high school.
“The reason Jessica stayed in McIntyre is cause she only has two and half mths to graduate,” June insisted. “It was a hard decision but she wanted to graduate with her friends she had been with for 10 yrs but she comes home and we talk and I’m up on all her progress still.” June added that Jessica plans to start college in the fall. June also didn’t elaborate on where Jessica was living!
Okay, okay. When I’m wrong, I say I’m wrong (pours out some wine for the amazing Jerry Orbach), and I was wrong about the Here Comes Honey Boo Boo family. Once upon a time, I was the reality phenomenon’s biggest defender. Heck, I even made ‘sketti with butter and ketchup in a Country Crock container for a HCHBB viewing party! False. That was a giant lie. Not even I am that gross.
However, I did love this family’s dynamic. Mama June seemed extremely grounded in light of her crew’s sky rocketing fame (remember those trust funds?). Sugar Bear was (and honestly still is, or at least seems to be) a guy who just wants to do right by his common law (that marriage ceremony was bogus, right?) wife, their daughter, and his step-children. Alana Thompson, aka Honey Boo Boo herself, was everything you could have hoped for in a cheese-ball chomping, pageant preening, fart loving seven-year-old. Of course, when the news broke that June had left Sugar Bear and reconciled with the pedophile who had victimized her oldest daughter, I had to stomp on my rose colored glasses and throw them in the dump that family once foraged for our entertainment. Le sigh.
Since TLC wants nothing to do with the Boo Boos, who no longer fit their funky family-friendly image, the Boo Boos are taking their redneck lovin’ lifestyle to more interested parties – they hope! Reports are circulating that Mama June and the crew – including Sugar Bear – are in LA meeting with producers this week to shop around a new “Beverly Hillbillies Themed” reality show to various networks!
RIP TRAIN! It’s with a heavy heart I write that the one constant that was once part of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo is whistling a farewell to the once revered (at least by me) reality family of McIntyre, Georgia. While she may not make the best decisions (I realize that is the understatement of the year), matriarch June Shannon is still being fiscally responsible with her family’s television earnings…even if that’s the only way she’s being responsible!
The family is still facing backlash from the controversy surrounding her ex-boyfriendMark Daniel. Mark is a convicted child molester who linked back up with June upon his release from prison. Sadly, her oldest daughter was one of his victims. Her lapse in judgment (to put it VERY mildly) caused TLC to cancel the family’s hit show.
Now that Mama June has lost her job when Here Comes Honey Boo Boo got cancelled over her affair with a registered sex offender (and all the insanity that followed!), and she’s also having her paycheck seriously docked for ruining the almost fully-filmed fourth season as a result of her salacious behavior, someone at Vivid believes she’s hard up enough to accept a major payday for a sex tape. Please, no. Just please. NO.
According to sources Vivid approached June and Sugar Bear with the possibility of filming a specialty sex tape, but also performing for the network’s website!