I knew it would happen, y'all. It was just a matter of time before Real Housewives of Orange County newbie started to get on my last nerve. On Monday's episode, Shannon Beador and husband David traveled to Mexico with Vicki Gunvalson and that guy, and it just seems that nothing is ever as Shannon hopes it will be. The room is too small. Her husband has too much tequila, the ladies are judging her relationship by using the stories she's woefully told them when things were bad. She's under a microscope. Nope, Shannon. You just chose to live your life on reality television.
Of Monday's show, she begins, "It's especially difficult to watch these episodes that are about my marriage. It was hard enough to go through as we were filming, but as I watch again, I am basically reliving it. While some of it is positive, some of it is not. I am glad that you get to see David and I packing for Mexico. There is a sweet moment in my dressing room where I giggle when David hugs me. When David and I are connected, sometimes I act like a little kid and get giddy around him because I am still so in love with him. I am really looking forward to going on the trip and starting to initiate different approaches to my relationship because the ones I have been using have been failing miserably."
Oh Vicki Gunvalson – after eight or so seasons of Vicki annoying the piss out of us (see what I did there – cause Vicki peed her pants), she's getting counseling and emerged a wiser, more self-confident, and self-aware woman. And she's spreading her messages to the masses.
On last night's episode of Real Housewives of Orange County we entered an alternate universe of housewifery where Vicki was preaching about learning from mistakes, taking ownership, and in general being a happier person less concerned with what others think. Either Brooks' falsie-affirmations are working (the power of believing, yo!) or counseling is, but whatever – we'll take it. And I'll also take a Vicki G spinoff called The Love Tank Whisperer.
Vicki took her love tank restructuring seminar to Puerto Vallarta and invited Shannon Beador and her imploding marriage along. It takes a brave woman to take a disaster on vacation and still focus on the fun! Shannon and David are in a tailspin of dysfunction with Shannon digging in and clinging tightly to an evaporating David who is floating farther and farther out in the metaphorical sea.
On last week's episode of Real Housewives of Orange County an organic vodka courageous Shannon Beador took matters into her own hands to get to the bottom of some rumors concerning her marriage. Of course that meant barging into Heather Dubrow's house to demand answers and getting thrown out, but hey – a girls gotta do what a girls gotta do!
As most of Shannon's co-stars are sympathetic to reasons for needed answers, Lizzie Rovsek, who was mainly Team Heather during the episode suddenly understands Shannon's motives.
"For me, watching the episode brought me more clarity to Shannon’s situation regarding the email from her husband, David. During the time all this drama was going down I heard everyone’s side of the story, but was still confused as to what was really happening. I didn’t know exactly what went down," Lizzie admits.
Things have been pretty ugly in the four years since Tamra Judge and Simon Barney divorced. They have long been locking horns when it comes to what is best for their three kids, Sidney, 15, Spencer, 13, and Sophia, 8.
Simon tried to claim the first victory, trying to make it seem that his petition to not allow the kids to appear on the Real Housewives of Orange County was accepted by the courts. He even went so far as sharing a photo high-fiving his lawyer, but in actuality, the case is still on-going. That was not enough for Simon, who then claimed that Tamra was a neglectful mother. (Btw, if you ask me, Simon just seems like a vengeful, publicity-grabbing ex.)
After the claims of neglect, Tamra told People magazine, "I am saddened by the false stories my ex-husband has released. He has no foundation to his allegations and in my opinion will do anything to destroy me. Unfortunately, he is hurting our children and my family in the process."
And now, the family therapist is siding with Tamra, according to documents released to AllThingsRH.
Heather begins her Bravo blog, "Let's get right into this…The email…When Tamra and I were at Fig & Olive having lunch, she told me that things weren't good between Shannon and David and told me that he had written her a bad email. When I left her I went to a dinner in the other room with a group of women. They asked me what happened at my lunch with Tamra. They were very happy to hear that we had made up because they knew how upset I had been about the breakdown of our friendship. They then asked if I had ever heard from Shannon after what happened at her holiday party weeks earlier. I said no, but apparently things weren't good with her and David and he sent her some funky email and let's give her a break. Basically, exactly what Tamra had said to me. Should I have said anything at all? Probably not. Was it said in a gossipy, malicious way? Definitely not. The conversation was no longer than a minute or two. Unfortunately, one of the ladies present texted under the table to her friend that this conversation happened. The person she texted is a lady friend of David Beador's which is how the story got back so quickly." Is it just me, or is "lady friend" a negative insinuation?
I don't even know what to say about last night's episode of Real Housewives of Orange County. It was surprising – to say the least – surprising in that it featured real emotions and a storyline that did not seem entirely crafted by producers. Sure, there were moments that seemed 'encouraged' but the reactions of the women to the circumstances seemed deliciously authentic – which makes the episode both incredibly sad, and incredibly engaging to watch. In short, this is one of the most interesting episodes of RHOC I've seen in a while, except for the revolting Vicki Gunvalson and Brooks Ayers scenes.
Let's dive in!
Shannon Beador is at Tamra Barney's house looking for a confidante in a former kindred spirit. See Tamra has been down that divorce road again and again (and if this season's Eddie has any indication… again!). Shannon confesses that since their children were born – pretty much the beginning of their marriage – things have been very strained and distant; that David does not look at her with love in his eyes, and after a bout with allergies David pretty much permanently switched his sleeping accommodations to a guest room (which explains why the master bedroom looked so itty-bitty last episode!)
Heather Dubrow is a better woman than I am, because if my so-called friend acted like such an ungrateful twat when I was trying to do her a favor, I'd be all like 'see ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!' However, I don't live my life on Real Housewives of Orange County where faux friendships reign supreme!
The last two weeks, everything Heather does bugs Tamra Barney. Now I've often called ol' Heather Prissy Pants out for her arrogance, but she's been nothing but a good friend to Tamra who accused Heather of trying to sabotage her business when she chose to initially feature a different gym while guest co-hosting Good Day LA. Then when Heather announced she'd be doing a segment with CUT Fitness, Tamra, the ingrate, complained that Heather was too little, too late and then claimed Heather was awkward and 'frosty' on set. Finally the two friends hashed it out and according to Heather are back on track. I dunno, Dubrow – sounds like a risky move to me!
"I've gotten a lot of comments on social media about why I didn't cancel Tamra's segment on Good Day L.A. after the way she treated me at Shannon [Beador]'s holiday party. Well, first of all, I don't have ANY power regarding what guests the show books or unbooks," Heather writes in her Bravo blog.
Last night on Real Housewives of Orange County the dramas were as real as the friendships were fake. And Shannon Beador is about to learn a nasty lesson in Housewives betrayal – right on top of learning one about heartbreak. Why is this exactly the plot of a Lifetime Movie? Oh goody!
So, let's just break this down; either Tamra Barney's new doctor is injecting her with crazy-hormones (and by that I mean more crazy than usual hormones) or girlfriend is having a nervous breakdown. Of course, that still doesn't excuse her rancid personality and wretched two-faced-ness. Do personalities spoil like milk?
Tamra is still mad at Heather Dubrow for having a life beyond her or RHOC – and for daring to promote another gym on TV besides CUT Fitness. I mean that horrible hoochie-hussy – she is like single-handedly destroying Tamra's business. As if Tamra's behavior on RHOC isn't at allllll responsible for destroying her reputation.