Real Housewives of Miami held steady at 1.3 million. Meanwhile, Bravo's surprise (to me) hit Below Deck attracted its largest audience yet, with 1.75 million viewers. That's up 200,000 from last week's 1.55 million.
Finally, 1.810 million viewers checked out the series premiere of Teen Mom 3, but only 1.554 million stuck around for the second episode. I'm not surprised roughly 250,000 viewers checked out. Two hours of any new series is overkill.
Believe it or not hour number two ends with one of these awe-inspiring couples becoming engaged to be married. All together now – seriously?!?
Mackenzie talks to a friend about her relationship woes. She briefly wonders if Josh resents her for pursuing cheer after she demanded he quit rodeo he put bull riding on hold. Crazy talk! Mackenzie comes to the conclusion that she and Josh fight too much because they don't spend enough time together. She plans to ask him to move in with her.
Cayla wisely questions Mackenzie's thought process. She reasons, "I know moving in is risky, but it's got to be better than living apart."
The very long and emotional premiere begins with Briana. As you'll recall from 16 and Pregnant, Briana and her sister became pregnant at the same time. Brittany opted to have an abortion; Briana chose motherhood. Sadly, Devoin Austin checked out long before his daughter was born, causing Briana to keep his name off of Nova's birth certificate.
Now Briana leans on Brittany and Mom for help with Nova. Over lunch, the girls school Mom on what happens in relationships (Hint: not innocent walks on the beach. Evidence: see Nova.), and Mom sternly tells them NO MORE BOYS!
Last week, Farrah Abraham tweeted the link to her Amazon wish list, thanking her sugar daddies fans in advance for buying her gifts. Did you buy Farrah an "entriguing" chandelier? Or perhaps a new "dinning room" table and chairs for the former Teen Mom star… #confessiontime
Farrah told Radar that all the items on her list – all $13,000 worth – have been purchased. (Side note: I have since learned that wish lists are super popular among porn stars and escorts. Who knew?!?) In true Farrah fashion, she went on to justify the list, making absolutely no sense whatsoever.
It's no secret that Farrah Abraham worships herself. Now, the former Teen Mom star has shared the link to her Amazon wish list, graciously giving her fans the opportunity to shower her with gifts. My. Heart. Sings.
Last week, Mackenzie revealed that she and Josh were already married andexpecting their second child, but the couple enjoyed a big country wedding with family and friends on Saturday. Wrangler jeans, cowboy hats, and rhinestones!
This morning, Mackenzie shared, "Had the redneck wedding of my dreams and married the good ol country man of my dreams … excited to see what God has for our future." For starters, Mackenzie and Josh start college today, and a new baby will join big brother Gannon early next year.
Dustin Sullivan, the judge whisperer, managed to get Jenelle's most serious charges – simple assault; possession of heroin with intent to manufacture, sell, distribute; possession of Percocet – dropped. The Teen Mom 2 star pleaded guilty to possession of drug paraphernalia and was sentenced to 18 months of unsupervised probation.
Jenelle was free to go about her normal day, which usually consists of video gaming, napping, soaking in the tub, and cyber bullying former besties, random fans, former boyfriends, and husband Courtland Rogers. However, she failed a drug test issued by the court, so to the slammer she went for 48 hours.
Jenelle was released from jail Wednesday morning. What. A. Spectacle.