Because Bravo knows a good thing when it sees it, last night we were treated to even more madness from the Real Housewives of New Jersey. While the season was supposed to be over after the reunion trilogy (The Hunger Games it was not), the network decided to milk a little bit more out of the women and the viewers. So it is without further ado, I present to you the lost footage from season four. It's actually very telling to see what ended up on the cutting room floor, and what's being revisited in light of the ongoing feud surrounding Teresa Giudice and everyone elseMelissa Gorga. Editing truly is magical!
Narrated by Andy Cohen, the episode takes us behind the scenes of what happened during the season and at the far-too-drawn-out reunion. Buckle up (if you haven't boycotted the show yet!), and enjoy the bumpy ride with Melissa, Teresa, Caroline Manzo, Jacqueline Laurita, and Kathy Wakile. It's truly a sight.
We begin with a lost cause…Andy is trying to convince Juicy Joe (once again) that homophobic slurs are offensive and nasty. Joe is all, Ahhwatdisagain? before turning into a brick wall of Who Cares. By the way, did you know that Joe went on a boat ride with seven guys and one of them was gay? He is not a homophobe. The comments he made about Gregg Bennett were meant to be funny, not mean. He's so sorry Greggy doesn't have a sense of humor! Jacqueline tells Andy that she thinks Joe speaks more out of ignorance than maliciousness. Fair enough.
Aaaahhh… it wouldn't be a day in reality TV blogging without some Real Housewives of New Jersey gossip. Ever hear of that saying Cher, cockroaches, and spam would survive an apocalypse? I think we need to add our favorite dueling New Jersey sisters-in-law to that list!
First up, Teresa Giudice says what some have been thinking all along; that Melissa Gorga is using Teresa's name – and their televised feud – to keep herself in the press! After complaining long and hard that Teresa loves the tabloids more than her family and friends, it seems Melissa also has a tabloid love that once unleashed cannot be squashed. Perhaps tabloid interviews are like tattoos (or designer sweaters, in my case) – in that once you get one, you just can't stop!
Melissa has been making the rounds pleading her case and talking up Teresa left and right. In a recent Bravo Blog, Melissa accused her fame hungry sister-in-law of being behind strippergate yet again and cites Teresa's friendship with Kim D as proof. Melissa also accused Teresa of doing appearances with Kim.
There is never a dull day in the land of Real Housewives of New Jersey. In my mind pretty much the entire state is wrapped up in the cesspool of drama that is this show. And while I'm not always Bethenny Frankel's biggest fan, what I'm about to write has me agreeing whole-heartedly with one of her recent tweets: "Does it ever amaze you what desperate people will do to stay relevant?" And while I'm pretty sure she wasn't referring to the ladies of Jersey, i still think it applies.
First up Melissa Gorga is not letting this season go. After spending an entire season complaining thatTeresa Giudice was talking about her in tabloids, it seems Melissa really just wanted a piece of the pie. And it's tabloids and more tabloids! Speaking to In Touch Weekly, Teresa's regular haunt, Melissa has a little advice for her sister-in-law.
Danielle dragged her poor besieged daughter Christine to NYC where she had a sit-down with Andy and claims they talked many things – including Housewives. "It was a general meeting," Danielle hints. "There was a lot of talk about everything — including Housewives."
Danielle obviously left with a goodybag because she was clutching Cohen's book like it was a life support device and she was on her last breath… Which speaking of, Reality TV wise she kinda is. Unless…
Oh Lord. Who knew that stripper-gate would be the scandal of our generation? Somewhere Richard Nixon is laughing his arse off at all of this. I gave up wishing the ladies of Real Housewives of New Jersey would go away in the off season, but doesn't it sound like such a nice break?
We'll probably never know exactly what happened between Melissa Gorga and sister-in-law Teresa Giudice. To be honest, I don't even care anymore. At all. Of course, the women think we do, so they're going to keep talking about until the next big drama occurs. You do realize that means we'll be hearing about this until the show airs again, right? That's kind of a long way off from now. Yikes.
I know you're waiting with baited breath, so I'll get right to the point of this post. Melissa takes to her Bravo blog to answer her fans' most burning questions. It's deep y'all!
Speaking to RumorFix at the grand opening of Splits Richards new boutique (Hey! Why wasn't RT invited, Splits?!) Marisa dishes on RHONJ and her words weren't exactly kind.
"I don’t like the New Jersey Housewives. I’m so sick of seeing Teresa [Giudice] and her family fight. It’s annoying. I don’t want to see it anymore," Marisa lamented. See – even OTHER housewives are tired of the toxicity, it's not just for plebian viewers anymore. What are you going to do about THAT, Cohen?
So we've made it. It's the end of Real Liars Housewives of New Jersey. I don't know about you, but I am so relieved to be done with this show. I don't know where I stand on things other than to say that I can see everyone's points as valid, but I'm tired of hearing about them.
So let's get started. We begin with Juicy Giudice still under interrogation. He's familiar with it by now, I suppose, given all his legal infractions. Caroline Manzo's comments about how Teresa Giudice will leave her husband and write a book about it if he goes to prison are revisited.
Caroline seems to be saying without saying it that editing minced her comment or took it out of context. Or perhaps she just doesn't want to admit that she said and meant it. There's so much backpedaling with these people I never know what to think. Anyway, Caroline dismisses it as a "hypothetical" and Juicy snaps that Caroline is a "know it all" She is – a very unwarranted 'know it all.'
Caroline says since Teresa is discussing her marriage with magazines, it's fair game. Andy Cohen asks about Joe admitting in Napa they got paid by the magazines, but all of the sudden it's denies, denies, denies. 'Huh? I said that? I was drunk? Whaddai say?' Joe and Teresa are masters of obfuscation. That should be their next book!
Tonight is the FINAL, final episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey. After a season of constant turmoil I need a vacation, some PTS therapy, and a long hiatus from family drama not my own.
Tonight's episode will explore the final meltdown of a family who has been destroyed by reality TV. Tonight the husbands take the stage and the Joews will battle to expose each other as the sleaziest, grossest, and worst husband! Lord only knows how that will turn out but my money is on Juicy Giudice getting dirty.