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The Situation


Last night’s Jersey Shore episode was aptly titled by the network “Free Vinny.” Not even 30 seconds into the episode and I can’t get Micheal Jackson’s “Free Willy” soundtrack song out of my head, only my mind is singing, “Hold me, like the roommate Vinny, and I will say to thee, you are my friend.” Pathetic, right? Right. I hope it sticks with you as it has with me. :)

So right off the bat, we all know it’s NEVER a good sign if the Shore Store boss shows up at the house. He knows his hair blends in all too well with the house’s “quaint” wood paneling, so usually he tries to stay as far away as possible from that set. It must be dire. It is… with Vinny at home and Mike MIA, there are shifts that need to be covered. Crude words aren’t ironed on to scanty boy shorts all by themselves, dear readers! Boss man Danny is not happy with their work ethic and he threatens to increase his employee base. That means potential new roommates for the gang. Because this show has all of a sudden turned into the Real World.

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Karma comes every Jerzday with those crazy kids from the Jersey Shore. Last night was no exception with meatball mania, Pauly’s party, and a sad, sad Situation.

Pauly D sadly watches his friend Vinny drive off into the night. He heads to the club to inform the roommates that they are now a man down. Deena starts bawling, forcing Jenni to play mother hen to Drunk Deena. In the restroom, she tries to compose herself as Jenni bravely pulls Deena’s belt skirt over her lady bits. After calming down, Deena is ready to take to the dance floor regardless of the big hunk of toilet paper stuck to her shoe.

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Back to the boardwalk! Last night’s Jersey Shore took a step back from the norm. Instead of being a PSA of how not to act/dress/drink yourself into a combination of regret, remorse and oblivion, it was more a study in sociology. This show has long been touted as a gluttonous look at very tan, very blinged out people with too much money, time and booze… but not quite enough sense. As it should be.

However, before I ever got this dream job of blogging for RT, I watched religiously — and not for the antics and the ridic catch phrases and abbreviations (although those are Ah. Maze. Ing!) — because, unlike with any other heavily scripted reality show, these folks really seem to care about one another. They brawl, they bitch, they hook-up, things get awkward, but no matter what, at the end of the day, they really are a family. #SundayDinners

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Jersey Shore 2012
Happy Jerzday kids. In today’s Jersey Shore update the stars of the Boardwalk are everywhere – on talk shows, getting tattooed, talking about each other, but is it too much? Here’s a break down of what’s been happening in guido-land!

First up, Snooki got a new tattoo to go along with her new super svelte body. Snooki tweeted: “Gettin tattoo done as we speak omg I can’t . If I could say every curse word in the book I would……well I am. Out loud and proud.”

The petite pistol got a star with leopard print kisses and some hair pieces zebra stripes tattooed on her shoulder to go with the crown and pink bow on her other shoulder. This newest ink matches her very vibrant hair color! Photos of Snooki getting inked are below!

Next up, is the cast of Jersey Shore over-exposed? I mean they are everywhere with product endorsements, creating their own products, ring tones, liquor, tanning solutions — you name it — and now they are headed for spin offs? Is that just too much of a good thing?

Allegedly, yes. In Touch Weekly is claiming the cast can no longer make big bucks for appearances anymore because they are too prevalent! “They’ve saturated the market,” an insider claims. “Their popularity has dropped and venues are bored of them.” Well, they are only good at a few things: getting drunk, acting skanky and acting a mess… so yeah, I mean it’s not like they have actual talents to fall back on!

Over exposure or no, that certainly didn’t stop several clubs from booking them for New Years Eve celebrations. Of course, I don’t know how much money they earned to show up!

Finally, the ladies of Seaside Heights gossiped to MTV News about The Unit, The Situation’s brother from another mother. And if you’re wondering what The Unit refers to — it’s below his belt thankyouverymuch!

“The Unit is another part of Mike,” Deena Cortese explained. “He’s like Mike’s unit, it’s kind of unreal. He kind of, like, gives Mike more ‘umph’ to be, like, a jerk.” According to Snooki, “He’s like Mike times 10, so it’s, like, gross, gross, gross. It’s not attractive.”

If you’re hoping for more of The Unit’s U-nique charms he’ll be hanging around in a few more episodes this season. Lucky us!

I hope you’re ready because the second episode of the fifth season airs tonight on MTV (10/9c). Get your cocktails ready!

THOUGHTS ON SNOOKI’S NEW TATTOO? DO YOU THINK JERSEY SHORE IS STAGED? IS THE CAST OVER-EXPOSED?

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It’s an all new Jerzday, GTLers! Last night was the season premiere of Jersey Shore which found the gang back at the Shore for Round Three. I have to say, I love the local seasons as compared to Miami and Italy. The drama continues as Mike “The Situation” (or the Saduation) Sorrentino won’t stop with proving true the fact he hooked up with Snooks while she was with Jionni. Without further ado, I’m going to Jersey Shore, b*thches… and I may rip your heads off along the way!

Ciao Florence, s’up Jersey. There’s a montage of the group leaving Italy, although it’s clear they are thoroughly thankful for their experiences abroad. Or not. Fast forward two seconds to a Jersey shuttle ride and the whole cast is riding out to that infamous house that once had an Italian flag spray painted on the garage. What happened to the antics of watching separate housemates hilariously make their way back to the Shore? I guess production costs called for “an altogether now” arrival. Oh, nevermind… they went straight from Italy to Seaside. That’s quite a spring break! One thing hasn’t changed… no one wants to room with creepy old Mike.

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Happy Jersday! You know you’re psyched. The GTL-ers are returning to both the TV screens and the shore in the drama-filled fifth season of Jersey Shore!

Oh, it will be a season — of that I am convinced. A season of all the things that made us love them; far from the respectable and classy Italy and back to where they belong roaming the boardwalks of Seaside Heights in search of a drink, a good time and a grenade!

And oh my, are they happy to return to the land of the guidos and gyms and tanning salons. “They didn’t have any fried foods there, no mozzarella sticks or chicken parm,” Sammi complained to The Chicago Sun Times about the cast’s Italian adventure.

“It was so difficult to get my hair straightener to work out there; the electricity stunk. Driving was terrible. We had a stick-shift Fiat. I didn’t drive the whole time … I couldn’t wait to get back home.”

Well, now they are home and they are ready for action. Ready for more fights between Snooki and The Situation, ready for JWoww to be well… wowful, ready for Deana to do something shocking and ready for more tanning sessions than a girl can count. “We hit Jersey hard,” said Pauly D warns.

Of course — there will always be The Situation having situations! “Mike has always been that character — kind of an egomaniac, kind of mischievous, a snake in the grass,” Vinny says of his roommate. “Do I think it’s 100 percent real? No, but that’s the character he has on the show. It’s who he is in that scenario. He’s actually a good kid deep down.”

Watch a clip of the upcoming episode below. It features Vinny and The Situation reuniting with a little sexual chemistry of the dry hump variety. Or something. Only in Jersey, only in Jersey…

Jersey Shore Season 5 premieres tonight at 9/10c on MTV.

TELL US – WILL YOU BE WATCHING?

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Uh oh Jersey Shore, fans could the fifth season be their last? For the guidos and guidettes of Seaside Heights it seems being the drunken party animals embarrassing themselves on television has grown old now that they’ve had a taste of fame and fortune!

HollywoodLife reports that according to a source close to the show the cast members are over it! “The cast just isn’t as close as they once were,” the source reveals. “They are all pursuing their own projects, clothing lines, perfume lines and several of them want their own spinoffs. There’s a lot of competition and they all feel like they’re famous enough in their own rights to continue on without the show.”

Pauly D has been trying to secure his own reality show for a while,” a different source explains. “Mike [The Situation] wants his own show but no one really wants to go forward with it and Snooki and JWoww were trying to get their own show.”

JWoww has already confirmed she is filming a spinoff with BFF Snooki and is hopeful the plot will include them going on a road trip.

Jersey Shore’s Fifth Season airs on January 5th on MTV.

WOULD YOU WATCH ANY OF THE JERSEY SHORE CAST IN THEIR OWN SPINOFF OR SHOULD THE CAST STAY TOGETHER?


In response to The Situation‘s lawsuit against Abercrombie & Fitch, the company apparently believes they’ve done nothing wrong and The Situation has no grounds to sue them after they supposedly banned him from wearing their clothes and then referenced his famous phrases on two of their t-shirts! The company is accusing The Situation of having both a baseless lawsuit and of being unable to take a joke. Seriously.

The Situation filed a lawsuit against the company for knocking off slogans he claims he trademarked. The trademarks in question G.T.L and The Situation, of course!

Abercrombie & Fitch now denies the Jersey Shore star has any grounds to sue them “because he doesn’t technically own the trademarks in question… he only applied for them.” According to TMZ, A&F claims The Situation’s application for Gym Tan Laundry has been “suspended” because MTV “already owns ‘Gym Tanning Laundry,’ and the US Patent & Trademark Office thinks they’re too similar.” Oh my…

Despite the trademark issues, Abercrombie also believes that producing the shirts in question is actually protected under a law that “allows parody as part of free speech.” Not only that they were meant to be a joke and The Situation should get a sense of humor! The Situation has yet to comment on Abercrombie’s claims.

In other Jersey Shore news Snooki has been on a diet! And girl looks good! Revealing her new bikini body on Twitter, Snooki has been dieting and exercising diligently — and it has paid off. “So happy I’m at my goal weight I was when I was in high school! Feelin fit is amazing and can’t wait to tone up hardcore,” Snooki tweeted. And to complete her total transformation, Snooki asked Santa for a pair of “knockers” like JWoww‘s! Photos of a bikini clad Snooki are below.

[Photo Credit: WENN.com]

DOES THE SITUATION HAVE A CASE AGAINST ABERCROMBIE & FITCH? WHAT DO YOU THINK OF SNOOKI’S NEW BODY?

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