Last night on Vanderpump Rules lies flowed as precipitously as questions of truth and all converged together at the mouth of a river named Jax Taylor. Or something like that…
While Scheana Marie is on a blissful honeymoon in Hawaii, back home at SUR (SUR is a city now) things are erupting into a civil war – a civil war that is the opposite of civil, of course.
Kristen Doute has been “blowing up” Jax’s phone with texts and phone calls insisting he tell “the truth” about Tom Sandoval and “Miami Girl.” Once, a very long time ago, when Jax was trying to look like boyfriend of the year to future pizza parlor dumpee Carmen Dickman, he disclosed to Kristen and Carmen that the tabloid stories were true: Tom 1 did play three minutes in heaven? hell? with Miami Girl. Jax has been trying to retract it ever since; putting Kristen off, telling her to leave him out of it and deal with it on her own.
But Kristen has been using this statement to zealously fuel her fervor. It has stoked her loins with future retribution, the little talisman she has carried deep in her heart, that there is a way to weasel in between the home wrecking hussy Ariana Madix and Tom’s future and re-seize him for her demented little self. You think I am exaggerating, but Kristen is like Golum with the ring in Lord Of The Rings.
Kristen teams up with Stassi Schroeder and resorts to using Jax Taylor as a source of the “truth” regarding what happened in Miami – Jax has changed his story several times. As a result Kristen ends up on the outs with all of her friends from SUR!
In anticipation for the onslaught of negativity she is surely to receive, Kristen announced she’s taking a wee break from twitter to focus on her healthy relationship with James Kennedy, her friends, and bowling. She also celebrated her birthday!
It’s Oscar mania everywhere as we lead up to Sunday night’s awards ceremony. And while our favorite reality stars will most likely NEVER attend the Oscars, much less WIN one, they still love to party and celebrate anyway!
Last night was part 2 of Scheana Marie‘s wedding on Vanderpump Rules. And outside of Bridezilla meltdowns and parking lot brawls it was a beautiful event. It appears that it’s not a Scheana Marie party without somebody gettin’ punched…
Kristen Doute wipes away tears as she congratulates Scheana. The faraway look in her eye is focused on Tom Sandoval, nuzzling Ariana Madix‘s neck as they giggle at an inside joke. Kristen remembers those days, etched deeply into her fabricated memories. Kristen so wanted to rip Scheana’s wedding gown off of her, tackle Tom 1 with it – muzzling him with the 15 pound pearl-beaded crop-top, wrap him up in the table cloth skirt, and drag him to the altar!
Jax Taylor is not a fan of Kristen Doute, even though he was willing to sleep with her. Twice. But c’mon, people make mistakes, right?! Jax shares that not only is Kristen a manipulative nightmare, who is using James Kennedy, but that she ruined Scheana Marie‘s wedding!
Jax says the scene where Tom Sandoval confronts James about Kristen’s sneaky behavior made him “really feel bad for the guy” because he is so clearly being used by Kristen. “He’s a young kid who likes this girl and trying everything in his power to have a relationship with her, when she’s still pining over Tom,” the VanderpumpRules star says.
Last night on Vanderpump Rules there was a wedding instead of cheating drama! Scheana Marie got married and it had all the tackery and whinery one would expect. What one could not expect is that she spent approximately $100,000 on disco glitter and tantrums.
Things begin with Scheana visiting Lisa Vanderpump‘s house for a pre-wedding check-in. Lisa wants to know if Scheana is really in love with Shay, the lurking hulk of gooey melted gummy bears that is about to become her permanent bedmate. Scheana is – why, she couldn’t tell you. What Scheana CAN tell you is that the heart wants what the bride wants no matter what it costs! It is HER. DAY to be pretty princess for a change, to usurp Stassi Schroeder as the unequivocal self-dubbed princess in the big pouffy dress and have all the attention ON. HER.
Lisa wonders how Scheana is paying such extravagances as 5 sets of mink eyelashes and 50,000 rhinestone-studded rose pedals… Well, since you asked, Scheana is using her lawsuit settlement! BRAKES SCREECH… what, you say? Remember when Scheana broke her teeth and had to have 6 hours of agonizing dental surgery and no one visited her in the hospital? Well Scheana sued whomever broke her teeth and got a settlement, which she is blowing on her very own Barbie dream wedding!
Reality stars – past and present – turned out for OK! magazine’s pre grammy party last night at Lure nightclub in L.A. Everyone from Joanna Krupa (who chopped off her long hair) to Lisa Vanderpump and a few SUR employees and many more showed up for the night out.