Vanderpump Rules

Tom and Katie - final days

Last night’s Vanderpump Rules traveled through the few remaining days before Tom Schwartz legally yoked himself to Tequila Katie. Actually, Tom has optimistically decided to eulogize Tequila Katie – maybe that explains why they spent $10,000 on flowers! Double-duty for a funeral?

Before everyone converges in the middle of nowhere “where no one can hear you squeal, boy,” (name that movie!) Tom 1 and Jax Taylor must take care of some risky business in the big city. They must summon their courage with a tiny trumpet and drink raw eggs for manliness. They’re doing this for Tom 2. As he relinquishes his bank account, his soul, and what’s left of the d–k he can only partially find, that only partially works, Tom 1 and Jax will be his everlasting strength.

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Vanderpump Rules is all new tonight and we inch ever closer to the wedding of Tom Schwartz and Katie Maloney!

On tonight’s episode the wedding party picks up their tuxes and dresses and head off to prep for the big event. Katie is still in shock that she was able to find dresses that these “picky bitches” could all agree on! Jax Taylor freaks out when Tom‘s brothers miss their flights and it threatens to ruin the big surprise.

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It was only a matter of time until Andy Cohen had Jax Taylor on Watch What Happens Live with Carl Radke and Kyle Cooke.  I love all of these Vanderpump Rules and Summer House crossovers. It was inevitable that the night was going to get inappropriate and sexual with the questions from Andy and the viewers.

The three of them had a lot to say about all of the drama we have seen on TV and what is currently going on in real life.

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Tom & Ariana do the Annual SUR photoshoot

On last night’s Vanderpump Rules tormented lovebirds Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz fixed everything and now their relationship is perfect. All it took was a little tough love from Lisa Vanderpump.

In the land of SUR and SURvival, all amounts to one’s role in the annual photoshoot where themes range from nearly naked, naked, to naked with accompanying awkward sexual encounters. This year Lisa is trying to take that up a notch by adding a last supper of hedonism complete with a fake roasted pigs and grapes on Ariana Madix‘s butt. BUT more on that later – Lisa’s first order of business is to ask Katie why on earth she and Tom 2 went on a vacation and spent the entire time in an extended “flare up”?

Seriously why does Katie call their arguments flare-ups? It makes it sound like a herpes outbreak.

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The Vanderump Rules gang is leaving the drama of New Orleans behind. Tonight we get back to Tom and Katie’s wedding planning, blind dates, and celebrating the return of the SUR photo shoot!

Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz ask Lisa Vanderpump if she’ll officiate their wedding. Lisa expresses concern over their seriousness in making a marriage work. Katie sobs. Jax Taylor offers to step in as the officiant if Lisa turns them down. Tom equates this to asking Lucifer to baptize you.

INGLEWOOD, CA - MARCH 05: TV personality Scheana Marie attends the 2017 iHeartRadio Music Awards which broadcast live on Turner's TBS, TNT, and truTV at The Forum on March 5, 2017 in Inglewood, California. (Photo by Alberto E. Rodriguez/Getty Images)

Happy Monday! Check out what your favorite reality stars were up to this weekend! Scheana Marie and several of her Vanderpump Rules co-stars, Stassi Schroeder, Brittany Cartwright, Katie Maloney and Kristen Doute, attended the 2017 iHeartRadio Music Awards. A few days prior they turned out to help Lisa Vanderpump celebrate the opening of her Vanderpump Dogs rescue center.

Bethenny Frankel and Alexia Echevarria attended the opening of Estefan Kitchen in Miami. MJ Javid and Tamar Braxton helped Kardashian bestie Malika Haqq celebrate her birthday.  Andy Cohen hosted the 8th Annual Lenny Zakim Fund Casino Night In Boston. Melissa Gorga was spotted out and about in NYC.

Check out all of the photos in the gallery below.

TELL US – WHICH PUMP RULES STAR HAD THE BEST STYLE?

Kristen Doute

Vanderpump Rules star Kristen Doute is a master when it comes to stirring the pot and she owns up to everything she’s done. It was Kristen’s instigation that brought us that instantly iconic “battered wife” monologue from Tom Sandoval and restored Pump Rules to its former glory. Obviously, I am going to watch the show no matter what, but this season was lagging until that point. Thank you, Kristen.

In a recent interview, Kristen took responsibility for inciting that epic fight in New Orleans, attempted to explain the feud between Ariana Madix and Stassi Schroeder, shed some light on Scheana Marie’s split from Mike Shay, and continued her season-long analysis of Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz’s relationship. As per usual, she provided some prime insight and entertainment.

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The New Orleans trip resurrected this season of Vanderpump Rules. The whole thing was such a hot mess that I don’t even know where to begin. Luckily for me, I don’t have to since Jax Taylor and Tom Schwartz just opened up about the latest antics that went down this season. Plus, these two really have a way with words.

Jax and Tom recapped (what little they remember about) the bachelor party in New Orleans; they shared their opinions on James Kennedy’s girlfriend; they reflected on Scheana Marie’s divorce (spoiler alert: they both saw it coming); and of course they both addressed the criticisms about their own relationships.

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