Remember how last season on Vanderpump Rules everyone busted Kristen Doute‘s thongbutt for cheating on Tom 1? Well this season she’s accusing him of cheating on new girlfriend Ariana Madix. I dunno kids – it seems kinda transparent to me, like Kristen just wants Tom 1 all to herself and back in her thong-th-thong-thong-thong! (In case you’re wondering why I keep bringing up thongs, it’s cause Bravo gave us a lovely shot of Kristen’s thong butt).
This season everyone on VPR has undergone metamorphosis after the insane betrayals and they’ve grown. Except for Kristen. She’s stayed the same. Well, maybe she’s grown more crazy – we’ll wait on assessing that.
Kristen is supposedly madly in love with 22-year-old Baby Einstein (Slowstein? He ain’t sharp) DJ James Kennedy, who is trying awfully hard to get some attention on this here TeeVee thingy. First he tried to be besties with Tom 1, but when that didn’t get his pale, pastiness on camera, he decided screwing the desperate and maligned Kristen would have to suffice. Other than famewhoring, James enjoys BeamerSelfies. We’ll get to that later. So anyway, everyone has learned. Everyone has grown.
The Vanderpump Rules cast gathered last night to celebrate the upcoming premiere of their third season. Lisa Vanderpump and crew naturally gathered at the venue where all of the drama takes place: SUR.
The only cast member who appeared to be missing was Stassi Schroeder. This only fans my flames of speculation that she’s pregnant and trying hard to keep it under wraps until her spinoff is announced. You heard it here first.
Last night Life & Style held a party to celebrate their 10th anniversary and a slew of reality stars – past and present- turned out for the event.
The most shocking former celeb to see in attendance is the now-sort-of-reclusive Heidi Montag! And the biggest shock was that she’s almost looking like her old self again! Heidi reunited with some of her old Hills crew – Brody Jenner and Kristin Cavallari.
If you’re like me you simply can’t imagine Vanderpump Rules without its poster child mean girl villainess Stassi Schroeder. Reading the Regina George script to a tee, adding one part alcohol, one part really, really bad relationship judgment, and one-part plastic surgery to balance the whole thing out.
There were rumors that after last season Stassi was done with the show. She quit SUR and moved to NYC to be with new boyfriend Patrick and announced she was ready to move on, but once a famewhore, never reformed, right?! So of course she was brought back to stir up trouble!
The new grownup Stassi has moved on from the previous seasons’ antics. Stassi will not be working at SUR and describes herself as an “outsider” this season who didn’t participate in the majority of the mayhem. Although she will confirm that the third season, premiering November 3rd, has wrapped shooting.
Lisa Vanderpump will continue to wrangle the drama-laden SURvers as they simply cannot stop mixing business with pleasure! Tom Sandoval (Tom 1) has broken up with Kristen Doute, moved out, and is now happy with new love Ariana Madix, but Kristen continues to try and ruin Tom’s life by threatening to reveal secrets that could destroy his happiness.
Evil genius of reality TV Stassi Schroeder is about to become the next Ashton Kutcher! Rumors are swirling that Stassi has landed a Punk’d-style spinoff show on Bravo which will feature her pranking people!
The project, working title ‘Vanderpump Rules Superfan’, will feature Stassi hosting a slew of female Vanderpump Rules fanatics (aka Peter Madrigal lovers!) who will audition to become part of the notoriously addictive reality show by pulling off awesome pranks.