With the Oscars coming up on Sunday (but we'll be watching Real Housewives of Atlanta, of course), every organization is using it as an excuse to throw a party. OK! Magazine put out the welcome mat for a slew of reality TV stars last night – including practically the entire cast of Vanderpump Rules and their boss lady Lisa Vanderpump.
Why in the name of everything that is good would a poor girl subject herself to dating Jax Taylor? The Vanderpump Rules star has proven time and time again to be the worst friend and boyfriend on the planet, yet girls still flock to him. What about the term "sex addict" makes him attractive?
Oh, he's on television! That's right! I guess there are some ladies that wouldn't mind hitching their cart to his fleeting fifteen minutes of fame. I just hope they get tested regularly and don't mind the Stassitattoo on his bicep! Well, one such girl doesn't mind a bit. After dating Jax for a month (it's the real deal, y'all!), Carmen Dickman is already giving "exclusive interviews." Of course she is!
If you watched the Shahs of Sunset reunion, you know the cast feasted on delicious Persian food between screaming matches. Those crazy (literally!) kids of Vanderpump Rules even got a cocktail after their explosive, tear-filled sit down. But what of the housewives?
Something curious has happened to Tom 1 over the course of Vanderpump Rules. He's grown from a boy to a man. He has freed himself from the shackles of Kristen Doute's psychotic tyranny and Stassi Schroeder's emotional manipulations and terrible party planning. He has flourished from a sad, aimless emotional wrecking ball to a proud manish metrosexual.
Last night Tom 1 let his anger roar as he took down Stassi, put Kristen in her place, and practically ground Jax Taylor's aging meathead under his boot heel. And never did a hair bend out of shape! Is Ariana Madix responsible for this surge in testosterone - as if releasing himself from Kristen has allowed Tom 1's poor shriveled manliness to blossom Phoenix-style.
Whatever – I was impressed. Take no prisoners Tom. Actually, no, do take Jax prisoner and lock him away from the rest of us because boy deserves to do hard time not these puny 'you can keep your designer sweater' jail stints!
Good gravy, Scheana Marie is quite a piece of work. The Vanderpump Rules waitress and sometimes pop star wannabe has certainly gotten down the rules of Bravolebrity as she dishes on her upcoming wedding. Will it be televised? Scheana hopes so! Someone call Andy Cohen!
Of course, Scheana is smart enough to know (did I just type that?) to scoff at the idea of a wedding spin-off…nice way to beat the network to the punch of NOT asking you to have one! In the wise words of Sweet Brown, "Ain't nobody got time for that!"
Stassi explains her plans for any possible return if there is a season 3 of the show, "I've moved to New York. I've been blogging for other sites and now I've been developing my own. I'm really excited about that. I'm working with different accessory and jewelry brands with styling. And that's where I'm at. I'm not gonna go waitress again. I'm kind of just doing me and doing what makes me happy. "
When she doesn't really answer about returning to the show, Andy says, "I hope we can figure out a way to see you back there somehow".