Well if ever there was a reason to recklessly abandon tea and convert to coffee, last night's episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills was it! Does tea just bring out the worst behavior in everyone – or is that wine? Or is it actually just that 3/4 of the people on this show are hideous specimens of humanity?
So Lisa Vanderpump tried to make amends last night. She took all her fancy British etiquette and tried to apply it to unscrupulous famewhores. Logic fail! She began with Splits Richards, whom Lisa had always believed to be a fun person, a friend, but underneath all Kyle's layers of caftans and hair lie a woman possessed. Possessed with the desire to be important and relevant – and most importantly famous. Enter Reality TV.
Then Lisa tried with Adrienne Maloof who was let out of the cryogenic freezer before her face fully thawed to socialize with the ladies. Adrienne's equally unappealing friend (and Kyle's Doppelganger) Faye Resnick was also hauled out for the unappetizing occasion. More on that thoughtless and repulsive decision later.
Tonight Lisa Vanderpump will finally sit Splits Richards down and explain a little thing called friendship to her. It goes like this: have friend, be loyal. Have friend: defend her in unpleasant situations. Have friend: do not plan to conspiratorially gang-up on her during a Real Housewives of Beverly HIlls reunion. I hope Splits gets it.
With their crumbling friendship finally being addressed on last week's episode and Lisa wondering why on earth Kyle is willing to defend everyone else (like her nemesis Adrienne Maloof), but never her, both ladies took to their Bravo blogs to share.
"I don't agree with Kyle's interpretation of the conversation 'Lisa and Camille [Grammer] got into it.' Umm no we didn't. Camille threw unwarranted accusations out of nowhere, stating that I was just the face of my business. . .," LIsa begins.
Our favorite reality TV stars can’t get enough of the spotlight during their regularly scheduled time slots, so they take to Twitter to share even more of their daily lives with us. And we love them for it! Here’s a roundup of some of our favorite photos from the Twitterverse this week! Enjoy!
We all know that Bravo manufactures story lines, so I guess I shouldn't be too shocked to learn that now it's manufacturing faces, too. After all, that is the gossip surrounding a certain Real Housewives of Beverly Hills' star…
Kim Richards doesn't mingle often with the her counterparts as she works to maintain her sobriety, and many viewers find her story line boring. What better way to spice it up than to put her in a situation that would cause viewers to be concerned about the possibility of her falling off the wagon? Well played, Bravo. Well played. Oh, and by the way, thanks for paying…
If there's one thing to be said about Yolanda Foster it's that she doesn't mince words! The newbie Housewife emerged on the scene to sweep a scrutinizing eye over the ladies ofReal Housewives of Beverly Hills and their rather questionable behavior.
Unsurprisingly Yolanda has found much to be amazed by – and that's not a compliment. On a recent girls trip to Vegas she found herself surrounded by dinner guests behaving badly when all she wanted to do was sip some tequila and enjoy her dinner. In her Bravo blog Yolanda gives her two cents on all the drama and the constant fighting round the table.
"I don't know Adrienne very well because she never reached out to me, but I have observed her behavior and she comes off quite arrogant. Again she is belittling Brandi [Glanville]'s business to empower herself, and I find it very unattractive and unproductive."
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills'Brandi Glanville continues to tweet up a storm in between bashing her ex-husband Eddie Cibrian and his wifey LeAnn Rimes as she promotes her new book Drinking & Tweeting and Other Brandi Blunders. Her book is set to hit shelves on Tuesday, February 12. Her most recent rant? She wants to set the record straight regarding rumors that she cheated on Eddie during their marriage.
Of course, then she needed to re-set the record straight when many fans and followers pointed out that she did, in fact, date before her divorce was finalized. It's like a strange conversation with herself that she broadcasts for everyone to see. I do so love some Brandi tweets though. Even when she only has 140 characters, she manages to be extremely unfiltered.
Marisa's Bravo blog about Monday's Real Housewives of Beverly Hills episode upset Yolanda, whom Marisa calls out for being "pristine" and "perfect." While it's not exactly a scathing critique, Yolanda obviously took offense because she lambasted Marisa on twitter!
Poor Marisa, like Yolanda, seems to be having trouble adjusting to all the catty drama and perhaps it's putting her on edge at social functions. The blog issues erupted because Marisa spilled wine all over her $5,000 white dress while in Vegas.
"I thought we may finally enjoy a dinner without a fight breaking out. How naive of me to think it was possible to have a civilized dinner with these women, right?," Marisawrites.
Last night while watching Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, I came to an important realization. I now understand why these women never eat and how they manage to stay so thin. If every time you sat down at a dinner table a massive fight broke out wouldn't you have dinner-induced trauma and be reduced to guzzling wine instead? They probably all go home and stuff microwaved popcorn in their faces while standing over the kitchen sink and ruminating about the days before they sold their souls to Bravo. But hey – at least those size 2s fit!
Yesterday's episode was more of the same. Same arguments, same players, same storyline, same snarky recapper wanting to hurl things at the screen. It started out OK, as it always seems to, but then quickly degenerated into the congealed, fetid remains of last night's dinner. Even Yolanda Foster was reduced to drinking tequila.
Most of the girls were in Vegas watching in awe as Brandi Glanville's legs twined around a stripper pole and slid gracefully to the floor. "Welcome to Night School For Girls!" she announced popping up with 3/4 of her boob also popping out. Splits Richards makes an important mental note to have Mauricio hypnotized into thinking Brandi is a revolting, wretched, shit-stirring drama queen again. He must not fall under her spell!