Do you think Craig Conover is still recovering from the hot dog assault on last week’s episode of Southern Charm? You would think he’d have learned by now how thick his skin needs to be if he’s going to be friends with Shep Rose and Whitney Sudler-Smith! While the boys continue their ill-fated road trip to get Austen Kroll’s mind off of Madison LeCroy, the ladies have their own agenda. Chelsea Meissner joins Danni Baird at the doctor for some egg freezing fun, and Patricia Altschul hosts the gals for a dinner party where the forgiveness is served with a side of Kathryn Dennis eye rolls. And those are just the highlights…what a time to be a Charmer!
The show begins with the boys readying for the drive to Nashville, but the awkwardness between Shep, Whitney, and Craig is palpable. Austen is silently peeved at Shep’s attempt to sweep the previous night’s nastiness under the rug. He believes it’s a pattern with Shep. Later that evening, the guys arrive at their Nashville hotel, and Shep is already planning the evening’s after party. As Craig preens, Whitney sanitizes the room in a way that would make Lisa Rinna proud. Shep has shaved his beard to a goatee. It’s not a good look. Austen receives a hot pic from Madison, and his friends are quick to remind him that this is the exact reason they aren’t together. She’s manipulating him.
Is it just me, or is Southern Charm not as charming as it once was? The premise was great when these folks were in their twenties, but mid-thirties frat boys just aren’t as entertaining. Don’t get me wrong, I still adore the show, but I’m nostalgic for the good old days of bar hopping and bed-hopping when it was funny…not semi-pathetic. Maybe I’m just in a mood…
The drama of last week’s episode seems all but forgotten (if only that were true!) as the Charmers prepare for their day. Craig Conover’s ADD interferes with cleaning up after his party, and Kathryn Dennis is getting a spray tan that will no doubt look completely natural. Speaking of natural, nothing looks more normal than Patricia Altschul’s butler Michael pulling her Bentley through the Mac Donald’s drive-thru. She’s craving a cheeseburger with no
ketchup tomato. She reveals that her guiltiest pleasures are Mickey D’s, Costco hot dogs, and Taco Bell tacos. In fact, Patricia prefers her fast food to the finest French cuisine. She nibbles on her number one in the backseat with a cloth napkin (not paper!) and glass of Cabernet while Michael toodles her around Charleston. What a life!
So last night’s episode of Southern Charm began right where last week’s ended…with Kathryn Dennis embroiled in a confrontational conversation with friends Danni Baird, Naomie Olindo, Cameran Eubanks, and Chelsea Meissner at a tree house dinner party in which the only alcohol available to numb the awkwardness is a one not often willingly consumed by folks who didn’t buy it with a fake ID. Good times! Cameran is choking it down though because it’s that kind of tension.
Danni requests a one-on-one with Kathryn by the bonfire. The rest of the group goes a-rootin’ tootin’ back to their respective tree houses, grateful for the reprieve. Danni is a really stellar friend, by the way. She delicately shares that the way Kathryn responds to things that she doesn’t want to hear hurts her feelings. She is unable to have a normal disagreement commonly shared among good friends, and instead, she shuts down completely. Just like she’s doing now when she doesn’t like what Danni has to say. No one knows the extent of Kathryn’s struggles, and no one can have an opinion on how she handles them. She feels embarrassed and betrayed by Danni.
Um, I get that Kathryn has trust issues larger than the loan on her Rolls-Royce, but she wouldn’t recognize someone legitimately caring about her if it smacked her in the face. Her issue with Danni seems less about trust and more about entitlement.
Last night we were treated to the first half of a tw0-part Southern Charm which answered A LOT of questions I never wanted nor needed to know. At all.
The charmers are getting ready for their day, and Patricia Altschul is concerned that her hairstylist is somewhat distracted. It seems Madison LeCroy has given Ms. Pat an unfortunate Kathryn Dennis-esque type poof. Whatever could be her issue? Only Austen Kroll knows for sure! Chelsea Meissner is the only one working, and some dude drops off a surfboard for Shep Rose prior to the aging frat boy’s haircut appointment.
Craig Conover’s penchant for laziness and lounging hungover in hoodies must be contagious because Austen has been afflicted. Over burritos and beer, Austen laments about the downfall of his relationship with Madison. He’s embarrassed to admit to his friends that he still in love with a girl who tried to slide into his friend’s boyfriend’s DMs. She seems so sweet and innocent given the fact that she’s only had three boyfriends in her lifetime. Craig teases that she probably had so few relationships because the rest of the guys never responded to her on Instagram. Craig has jokes!
After last week’s episode of Southern Charm confirmed the dastardly deed between Kathryn Dennis and Whitney Sudler-Smith, last night’s show focused on the perils of a new couple, Austen Kroll and his Instagalpal Madison LeCroy. I’m not counting out these two…if they can survive a threesome and retaliatory cheating, what’s a little DM action going to hurt?
Naomie Olindo is hard at work at her online apparel business, but she makes some time to Facetime with her adorable parents who are traipsing through Europe. In addition to her new endeavor, she is also helping her family run their Greek restaurant Nico. Speaking of precious parents, Chelsea Meissner’s dad drops off Tyson after dog-sitting him for Chelsea’s house-warming party. They discuss Chelsea’s sailor beau Nick who has a three-year contract in Rhode Island with the America’s Cup. She seems to have a type…and it’s someone who lives far, far away. She likes her space! Her dad wonders how the relationship will work for so long with such distance, but he adores Nick. He’s a man, and Austen’s more of a house cat.
Last night’s Southern Charm was swirling with the confirmation of the “did they or didn’t they” hook-up rumors surrounding Kathryn Dennis and Whitney Sudler-Smith. Shep Rose’s love life was once again thwarted by ill-thought Instagram posts, and we got to peek inside Craig Conover’s fledgling pillow company. It doesn’t get much better than that!
The episode begins with Kathryn unable to summon Austen Kroll on any of her smart devices. Across town, Cameran Eubanks is getting some much needed relaxation at the nail salon before being interrupted by Recent College Grad who comes in like a bull in a china shop. She’s got a cooler of kombucha and she can’t stop talking about her last name and her royal status in Charleston society. However, her politician father’s affair caused a serious blacklist for her family. She wasn’t even able to be a debutante! Cameran’s husband has known this girl’s family for decades (he gave her swimming lessons when she was four), and Cam likens her to a little sister. She gives RCG some sisterly advice–she needs tone it down and mind her manners. Cameran reminds RCG that her behavior at Patricia Altschul’s dinner party was over-the-top and obnoxious.
He’s got money, he’s in magazines….the tabloids! Last night, Southern Charm made it’s much anticipated return with one missing piece, one Mr. Thomas Ravenel, who is sitting out this round due to several alleged sexual assault accusations. We do get our OG Charmers–Cameran Eubanks, Kathryn Dennis, Shep Rose, and Craig Conover. To say I cannot wait for this season to unfold would be an understatement!
The format remains the same…we follow the Charmers through their morning routines. The only difference is this group of noon sleepers are all actually early-rising adults. One by one, they recap their thoughts on the allegations against T-Rav and his subsequent arrest. Kathryn talks to Danni Baird and Craig. Shep admits to Austen Kroll that he’s yet to check in on the mother of two. Chelsea Meissner and Naomie Olindo (added to the credits this season, congrats!) joke about whether what’s her name will stay with Thomas if he goes to jail. Cameran is wisely pleading the fifth. She doesn’t want to risk a lawsuit from the Litigious Lothario.
Congratulations! We’ve survived the the final chapter of
the Teresa Giudice Show Real Housewives of New Jersey reunion, although newbies Jennifer Aydin and Jackie Goldscheider definitely made sure their voices were heard. In the ladies fight for relevancy, they were faced with even more competition last night in the form of Danielle Staub and the extra wives husbands of the Garden State. Let’s be honest…these men bring just as much drama as their spray-tanned counterparts, and that is no small feat! Joe Gorga is reveling his second installment of the RHONJ reunion, having been invited early by Andy Cohen to attempt peace talks between his sister and his wife Melissa Gorga. Up to this point, both Margaret Josephs and Dolores Catania have been relatively quiet. I did preface that with relatively… 🙂
Last night begins with a continuation of Andy’s conversation with Teresa in which she admits that she won’t move her family to Italy if husband Joe Giudice is deported. She hedges around the word “divorce” but she won’t endure a long distance marriage. Her friends seem both shocked and sad at this admission. Tre explains that she and Joe have spoken about what will happen, and they agree that they should go their separate ways if he is no longer in the country. Teresa didn’t share this news with any of her friends, but Melissa isn’t surprised–she wants her sister-in-law to be happy, and she can’t imagine having to make that decision.