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Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills’ Denise Richards Weds Aaron Phypers

 

You know, I appreciate someone who follows the rules. In the case of Bravo’s Housewives franchise, it’s nice to see Denise Richards taking the title to heart. The latest addition to the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills tied the knot on Saturday to fiancé Aaron Phypers in a small ceremony in Malibu. Denise has been filming with Kyle Richards, Lisa Rinna, and crew (and vacationing with the ladies in the Bahamas), and if a wedding isn’t enough of a story line, I don’t know what is…although there is no word yet as to whether the nuptials were filmed for the upcoming season.

The movie star, and former Mrs. Charlie Sheen, is just one of the already famous faces to populate the RHOBH cast. I guess in Beverly Hills, a reality show is a great retirement plan after a career in show business. Sure, Bravo housewives always end up being famous, but very rarely are they a household name before the show—with the exception of the Rodeo Drive ladies and Real Housewives of Atlanta’s Kandi Burruss (and that one time with Kim Fields…).

Judge Grants The Bellagio An Order To Go After PK Kemsley’s Assets For Outstandin

Unfortunately for PK Kemsley, what happens in Vegas didn’t stay in Vegas. The husband of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills’ Dorit Kemsley isn’t just pals with Boy George or enamored by ridiculous phony accents. He’s also in a tad bit of debt thanks to racking up a hefty gambling tab at The Bellagio hotel.

Instead of throwing lavish birthday parties for his wife or purchasing pink luxury cars she’s unable to back down the driveway, Peeee Kaaayyyay should probably be looking into procuring some outside income in addition to that Bravo check. The Bellagio can now come after the huge sum he owes to the casino.

The Ladies Of Real Housewives Of

Y’all, I realize that we’re only two episodes into Real Housewives of Dallas but this sleeper franchise is delivering. Tonight’s drama is no exception. Sure, it’s refreshing to see LeeAnne Locken playing nice (in spite of her busted amygdala), but let’s bring out the knives claws. They’re just hands! At her baby reveal, Brandi Redmond confronts D’Andra Simmons about those pesky Adderall abuse accusations, and the gang heads to Kameron Wescott’s family home in Beaver Creek for a getaway filled with nastiness. Apparently the hostess in pink has received the memo that dog food does not a story line make!

Cary Deuber left her bikini in the Lone Star State, and Stephanie Hollman is trying to defend her friend without making anymore enemies. The trip looks like a scene straight out of a hybrid of The Shining and Pretty in Pink. Needless to say, I can’t wait!

The Crap Talking On Tonight’s Real Housewives Of New York Reunion Is Epic…Literally

Welp, folks. Just welp. I don’t know what to think as we head into the second installment of Real Housewives of New York reunion tonight. Being Andy Cohen’s first couch corral since Southern Charm, I believe he’s feeling empowered to speak his mind instead of playing meek moderator. However the cast isn’t empowering each other, or women in general, as accusations of nasty blogs and biting comments spew back and forth. Carole Radziwell and Bethenny Frankel are close to a throw down. The only one defending Bethenny more than Andy is Sonja Morgan, but it’s the former Carole accuses of being full of shiz. Yikes!

Despite the shattered friendship, we will be treated to more Giovanni heckling from Dorinda Medley, as well as the revelation that Tinsley Mortimer’s on-off beau sees other people on their breaks. Also Ramona Singer explains the downfalls of gravity when you’ve got “that kind” of stomach bug.

Emily Simpson - RHOC season 13

The only thing that assaulted my senses more than Gina Kirschenheiter’s voice on this week‘s Real Housewives of Orange County was Shannon Beador’s poker suit. However, what truly grated on my last nerve was newbie Emily Simpson’s husband Shane harping about how loud Gina was. His wife threw a poker party that included shots of Fireball as part of the place setting which was being filmed for a reality show. Did he expect demure whispers? He surely knew what his wife was signing up for when she joined the cast. Annoying.

On the other hand, should Emily even be a part of this cast? From my perspective she seems far too intelligent and normal to roll with this crew. Even her take on Gina’s foul mouth and Shane’s whining is measured, mature, and gracious. Her legal background is going to serve her well on RHOC—well, it likely won’t help her deal with the other orange wielding wackadoos, but it will be beneficial to viewers who want to read a well-written blog that isn’t fraught with typos and horrible grammar.

Brandi Redmond adopts Bruin

Get out of the way, J.R. and Sue Ellen! My ladies from the Real Housewives of Dallas are back! Like a bottle of Jesus Juice, these gals just get better with age. This week’s season premiere did not disappoint with Brandi Redmond’s precious new baby boy and LeeAnne Locken’s newfound zen. The flashback clip of “They’re JUST HANDS” never gets old, so that must be why it was shown umpteen times throughout the episode.

D’Andre Simmons feud with her frightening mother is going to be highly entertaining, and a fourth anniversary celebration is the perfect place to highlight their dysfunction. Y’all, it’s just going to be so, so good. So good.

Gina is drunk and loud

I realize that the Real Housewives of Orange County started it all, and we’ve gotten some fabulously dramtastic additional members of the franchise in its wake. However, who determines when a Bravo staple has jumped the shark? I’m not saying RHOC needs to be retired. Shannon Beador hot tubbing in Spanx was television gold. Vicki Gunvalson’s inability to form a sincere apology is always mildly entertaining. Even Kelly Dodd and Tamra Judge have been easy(ish) to watch this season (did I really just type that?). That said, I can’t get over the newbies. When will Andy Cohen learn? No extra is going to infiltrate this dysfunctional foursome.

It’s a bit of a shame. I’m sure Emily Simpson and Gina Kirschenheiter are lovely people, but they are nothing more than filler. Even if they were the most interesting women in the world, no one would be interested in their storyline. The foursome runs off anyone in its path, but I have to hand it to Gina. At least she’s attempting so somewhat stir the pot with her screeching voice and her constant brashness in the name of authenticity. I actually really like her, but she won’t last. Maybe she’ll be picked up by another member of the franchise that has an easier orientation than subjecting newbies to the Kook of Coto.

Below Deck Mediterranean Recap: I Ain’t Saying Eur(o) Goldigger

The ship pretty much hit the fan on last night’s Below Deck Mediterranean. I think y’all would agree that A YACHT happened. So sorry. The show started where last week’s episode ended. The chief stewardess and the bosun were in hot water with the captain.

Following Hannah Ferrier’s banishment to her cabin, Captain Sandy Yawn shrieks for Conrad Empson so she can lay into him about indirectly overworking Brooke Laughton. Sandy gave Hannah explicit instructions to return to the yacht after one quick Diet Coke. Given they were gone three hours, that must have been a massive Polar Pop of the D.C. (with that amazing pellet ice, obviously).