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Below Deck

Abbi Murphy Below Deck

Below Deck viewers and the crew members were shocked by the Abbi Murphy’s engagement via text message during last night’s episode. Yes, that’s right. In case you missed it, Patrik, the captain that Abbi referred to as her “f*ck buddy” popped the question via text message. He said he loved her, suggested that they get married, and it was just simple.

Abbi’s crew members were confused by her revelation, especially Ashton Pienaar who acknowledged that he had been trying to hook up with her this whole time. Spoiler alert, everyone: Abbi and Patrik did tie the knot.

Below Deck Ashton Pienaar

In beautiful sunny Thailand there is no paradise aboard Valor as the crew of Below Deck fractures at the seams under the misguidance of Ashton Pienaar.

To be fair I don’t know if it’s Ashton being in over his head from a leadership perspective, or like many a bosun before him, culled by the crazy of a green deckhand. Or a redhead. In this case the double-whammy!

Abbi Murphy has essentially decided that leadership and pecking order be damned – she does what she wants! Like getting so wasted she spends the morning vomiting and misses her clock-in time on deck. Abbi thinks working on Valor, for Captain Lee Rosbach, is like being the tortilla chip flipper at Chipotle. You know – it’s totes fine to text your boss half an hour before your shift starts to let them know that you were like partying soooo hard the night before that your mascara is still smeared all over your morning after dress and mixing with tears from vomiting for 2 hours straight. Hotttt!

Kevin Dobson Captain Lee Rosbach Below Deck Thailand

After finally ridding themselves of Below Deck‘s drunkest charter guest, the crew now has to tackle the problem of Kevin Dobson, the most arrogant and obnoxious chef the show has ever had!

Last week Kevin walked out in the middle of a meeting with Captain Lee Rosbach, then failed to serve him a main course during the guests final dinner. Knowing he’s in hot water Kevin decides to go overboard impressing the newest crop of drunken buffoons guests with a ten-course tasting menu. Unfortunately Captain Lee still remains less than enamored with Kevin’s offerings. 

Captain Lee’s Blog: Abby Murphy Broke Two Basic Rules-“You Were Embarrassing Yourself And The Boat”

Abbi Murphy is this Below Deck’s season token bohemian spirit that just wants to sail.  She is accustomed to spending her time on the water metaphorically drifting from port to port and making love her with sexy boyfriend/captain.  Wearing multiple uniforms and synchronizing fender drops doesn’t suit this fair siren.  Neither does showing up on time and working through a hangover.

If there is any symbolism to be taken from what we’ve seen so far, it’s that Abbi and her hair won’t be tied down.  We can all see where this will lead, but on the off-chance that Abbi does decide to conform to the yachting world, Captain Lee Rosbach offered his opinion and words of advice on his blog this week.

Reality TV Listings - Below Deck Captain Lee

Below Deck’s Kevin Dobson may be a fine chef, but has poor management of both his provisions, and his professional relationships.  No one is safe from Kevin’s hostility and passive-aggressiveness.  It’s not just Second Stew Simone Mashile that was under attack.  Last week, Kevin threw Chief Stew Kate Chastain under the bus.  Then he outdid himself yet again by turning his back, literally, on his superior Captain Lee Rosbach.

Captain Lee doesn’t like to babysit.  Or micro-manage.  He also will fire someone who is causing conflict to the level that Kevin has been.  Factor in that the output from the galley is less than stellar, and Valor may have a new chef before the end of the season.

Below Deck’s Jack Stirrup Is Expecting A Baby With Girlfriend

Jack Stirrup from Below Deck Mediterranean came across as as an impish guy.  With floppy hair that annoyed Captain Sandy Yawn to no end.  A problem with authority. And a sweet blossoming relationship with fellow co-star Aesha Scott.  They were two weirdos who found each other in the middle of the open sea.

The show has since ended. And reality has slapped everyone in the face.  It appears as though our cheeky brit, Jack, has been quite a busy fella with someone other than Aesha.

Captain Lee Rosbach

Captain Lee Rosbach’s blog is back y’all!  Below Deck fans can rejoice because this blog is so much better than the usual dose of Captain Lee snark.  The usual is one or two zingers per episode, now we have Captain Lee doing a rundown of each crew member’s performance.

Episode Three was all about Chef Kevin Dobson.  Inexplicably, Kevin decided to be hostile to both Simone Mashile and Chief Stew Kate Chastain.  He thought that rudely micro-managing another department was a good way to conduct himself.  Naturally, Captain Lee had something to say about it.

Below Deck Charter Guest Brandy Ashton Pienaar

Oh sheesh, last night’s Below Deck was A. MESS. From charter guest Brandy, a literal sea sponge soaked in champagne and leeching everywhere, to Kevin Dobson‘s inability to count, to Abbi Murphys drunken disarray… I don’t know what is in the water over in Thailand, but remind me never to drink it!

So Helen + ‘friends’ are on a beach picnic, slurping down cocktails and fish sandwhiches, taking selfies, and Brandy is so trashed she’s speaking in tongues and seeing apparitions in the pattern of her beach towels. Too bad she didn’t have an epiphany about the evils of gluttony, like Helen advised.