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Clint and Tracie

Love After Lockup Recap: Washing Off Prison

Before we recap the wonder that was Love After Lockup this week, let’s offer three cheers and some antibiotics to the brave camera crews who captured this “release day” footage. These hardy souls not only stood by while fresh-out-of-prison folk tongue kissed their lovahs for the first time. Nay! They ventured into woods to record full on sexytimes on dirt piles. I ask you: Can it get any better than this? Hurrah!

Speaking of dirt pile sex, let’s begin with Caitlin and Matt, who cannot wait one more second to jump each other’s bones, so they pull off into the woods to do the deed. This is how you get Lyme’s Disease, but Caitlin calls it the best sex she’s ever had, and Matt is happy he has a girl who doesn’t care about the odd lost tooth or poison sumac up her bum. #SoulMates

Love After Lockup Recap: I Want This To Be Real

WEtv is serving up some serious stank with the season two crew of Love After Lockup, and this Friday night’s show gave us another overflowing-dumptruck-claw of the garbage TV we need in our lives. Mmmm. Smells like 90 day old chicken.

Last week, Lizzie was released from prison, running into the open arms of Scott and knocking one of his 7 teeth to the ground. This week, we pick up with Lizzie’s ride home, which features an all expenses paid shopping spree at the gas station. And we thought fairytales were just for storybooks. Bah!

Love After Lockup Recap: The $12,000 Lie

If we thought Love After Lockup’s premiere episode for Season Two was insane, then we had no idea what WEtv had up its sleeve. Because this week’s Love After Lockup was even better. By better, I mean crazier, messier, and even more whack. Everything we’re looking for in our favorite trash TV show!

Last week, we met three couples plus a thrupple. Yep, one of this season’s inmates, Michael, has TWO women on the outside waiting for him. Neither woman knows the other exists, which will make for an extremely interesting release day. Before we get to this epic disaster, let’s review the progression/regression of events in everyone else’s tale of prison romance.

Love After Lockup Recap: The Virgin & The Trick

We asked, we believed, and we received. Love After Lockup is back with a new cast (and some familiar faces) for another season of love, prison-style. YES!!! From the producers who gave us 90 Day Fiance, Sharp Entertainment is bringing us a classic story of true romance: Boy meets girl, they fall in love, boy proposes to girl. Only one minor issue: Boy (or in some cases, girl) is incarcerated in the United States prison system.

If you enjoy hearing lines like, “I was cruising the internet one night and I stumbled across pictures of [prisoner’s name] on meetaninmate.com” as the introductory sentence to an epic love story, then this is the show for you. Our couples this season include two holdovers from Love After Lockup Season One – Scott & Lizzie and Angela & Tony – plus four new couples hoping to make it work on the “outside.” Let’s review who’s been pierced with Cupid’s homemade shiv this year.