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John Sessa

Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave - Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills

Lucy Lucy Apple Juice continues to be the breakout star on this season of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. So many sides of this dog drama are unfolding every episode. The main point of contention seems to be whether or not Lisa Vanderpump wanted the story out. Did LVP want to punish Dorit Kemsley? Or did Lisa’s Vanderpump Dog employees actually go rogue? Perhaps LVP’s shiny new puppet Teddi Mellencamp has the answer.

LVP seems adamant that Teddi was the one gossiping with “The Johns” about Dorit’s dog drama. It all came to a head in last night’s episode when Teddi and LVP discussed the situation. Teddi expected an apology, while LVP wanted to “confront” her about the whole thing. Clearly someone is lying in this situation. The conversation led to Teddi storming out of Lisa’s room. Later that night it was LVP abruptly leaving after feeling “hammered” by her costars. It’s all so confusing, but Teddi is speaking out and giving THE RECEIPTS!

Dorit Kemsley - Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills

No one on Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills ever learns. Most of the cast never learns that it is simply not possible to take down Lisa Vanderpump. Sorry, I know your hopes are dashed harder than a broken botox needle, but this is the truth you must accept. You are all middle-aged, even if you’ve had six facelifts, and Lisa is not going to be toppled over defending Dorit Kemsley.

Likewise, Lisa Vanderpump never learns. She never learns that she can simply admit that yeah, she was trying to manipulate, and so what? After Lisa rendered them all impotent of storyline, she could toss a baggie of Viagra on the table, and saunter away; the ruffles on Lisa’s shiny satin blouse shaking as she tried to suppress her chuckles. After 7 seasons of the ‘Take Down LVP agenda’ she remains harder to conquer than the Viet Kong, even though the one tactic LVP has never tried is a strategic fake-out. 

Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave

Loyalty to your friends doesn’t last long in Beverly Hills!  Last season, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave was Lisa Vanderpump’s “Teddi Bear,” and they bonded over their love of horses. Now Teddi has officially switched over from Team Lisa to Team LVP Manipulated Me.

Teddi is upset because Lisa called her out for talking about Dorit Kemsley and #puppygate.  And instead of taking accountability for her own actions, she’s blaming Lisa. Does Teddi need to retake her online accountability coach exam?