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Lisa Vanderpump

Lindsay-Lohans-Beach-Club

We begin tonight’s episode of Lindsay Lohan’s Beach club with Lindsay Lohan sitting down with business partner, friend, creative director, and all-around boss bitch Panos Spentzos, and the new hires to have a little meeting.

She decides to hand out paper and pens. Then, she asks everyone to write down their intentions.

“What are your goals if you want to work with Lohan? What do you want out of life?” she asks the group. <sigh> This seems a little too cutesy for me. Can you picture Lisa Vanderpump asking the workers at SUR to write their thoughts and feelings down?

Tom Sandoval & Tom Schwartz

Are Tom Sandoval and Tom Schwartz Lisa Vanderpump’s business partners or not? Based on the small snippets we get to see on Vanderpump Rules, it’s as if she can’t decide. One minute, she’s entrusting them to come up cocktails for the menu. The next, she asks her daughter Pandora Vanderpump to take on the task instead. On last night’s episode, Lisa had the Toms come up with some drink recipes for a Daily Mail event.

During that same episode, Lisa banned Tom and Tom from being present when Nick Alain, their restaurant designer, showed up with decor and furniture for the restaurant. Really? They can’t even help unload boxes for a restaurant named in their honor? Nevertheless, they showed up anyway much to Lisa’s (perceived) dismay. She claimed that she didn’t want to leave them in suspense if they saw everything before it was set up, but that just doesn’t make the most sense.

Yes, we get it, Lisa and Ken Todd have contributed a majority of the money to  TomTom and they have greater ownership in the restaurant. And, of course, there’s no doubt that they’re experts in this industry. Nevertheless, the inconsistent inclusion of Tom and Tom at a restaurant called TomTom is pretty ironic. Tom Sandoval’s girlfriend Ariana Madix stood up for the Toms and called out Vanderpump Rules production in a series of tweets.

Vanderpump Rules Recap: Bad Mutha

Last night’s Vanderpump Rules was the collision of past and future as Stassi Schroeder’s mother demonstrated that the rotten apple doesn’t fall far from the tree!

The morning after her birthday meltdown, Stassi has some amends to make with Beau Clark. Stassi’s hangover face, puffy and red, has aged her 15 years yet she’s still drinking a beer for breakfast! It’s like one of those aging apps that shows what you’ll look like on your 50th birthday.

Apparently Stassi’s telephone harassment of Beau escalated to in-person harassment. She stormed back into the party to demand he come to bed with her immediately. And in response Beau cried. The next morning he whines that when Stassi yelled it felt like getting “dick punched” in the heart. Do dicks punch? I hadn’t known. Oh, maybe Beau means like being punched by an actual dick. Someone like Jax Taylor, perhaps.

Stassi Schroeder & Her Mom

On tonight’s all new Vanderpump Rules the fallout from Stassi Schroeder and Ariana Madix‘s joint birthday proves to have long-term drama in Stassi’s life.

First Stassi has to make amends with Beau Clark after drunkenly calling him, texting him, and screaming at him during her party. Thankfully, Beau loves Stassi but he is not willing to put up with her antics. 

Lindsay-Lohans-Beach-Club

Who doesn’t love a good comeback? Lindsay Lohan is back in the spotlight, for good reasons this time. She just debuted her new reality show Lindsay Lohan’s Beach Club. Set in Mykonos, Greece, the show follows Lindsay’s staff of age 20 something VIP hosts as they work at her new glamorous beach club.

The staffers keep difficult clients, and most of all, Lindsay, happy and satisfied. Unfortunately, there’s trouble in paradise as the staff focuses more on partying than taking their job seriously. This causes unnecessary drama for Lindsay who does not want the reputation of her club, or the Lohan brand, ruined by their actions. 

Dorit Kemsley & PK Kemsley

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Dorit Kemsley’s tagline “I may believe in an excess of everything…except moderation”, might hold more truth than we realized.

Dorit, whose faux English accent has the same effect of nails dragging across the chalkboard, and her husband,  PK Kemsley, live a lavish lifestyle in Beverly Hills.  Where Boy George sleeps in your guestroom, and a $3 million car as a possible birthday present is nothing to bat a fake eyelash over.

However, it seems as though their lavish spending might have caught up with them. Not only is it time to pay the piper…their payments are late.

Kyle Richards 13 Most Memorable Moments On Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills

This week we celebrate Kyle Richards‘ birthday, a momentous Bravo occasion if ever there was one, because it is Kyle who brought us kaftans. I cried tears of warm rosé to learn that Kaftans By KyleKantoo closed last year, because how else am I going to satisfy my dream of being shrouded in polyester satin leopard print, weighed down by giant rhinestones and chopped off at the mid-thigh? I guess I’ll have to travel all the way to Beverly Hills to raid Kyle’s closet!

So anyway, follow me as we go on a journey of Kyle’s best (and by ‘best’ I mean WORST!) and most infamous moments on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.

Most of Kyle’s notable moments are connected to Kim Richards. The  Twisted Sisters Richards have formed the cornerstone of this show’s consistent focus of very real family dysfunction from practically the very first episode.

Katie gives Lisa an ultimatum about James

After years of solely referring to Randall Emmett as “my man,” Lala Kent is much more open about their relationship. Nevertheless, he still hasn’t appeared on Vanderpump Rules. Now, that is something that Lisa Vanderpump wants to change.

Everyone else on the show is so open about their personal lives. So why does Lala get a free pass? Yes, I’m well aware that she’s said (several times) that her man isn’t the one who signed up for Vanderpump Rules. Blah Blah Blah. I get it. That’s valid. However, it just doesn’t really seem right that everyone else is giving so much of their lives. Plus, Lala and Randall are engaged now. Why not share their love? Let the viewers see what it’s like to travel via private jet on a regular basis?