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Lisa Vanderpump

Kyle Richards

Lord this season of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills is making me reach for the CBD oil faster than Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave can turn on a friend and spin on a bike!

It all ends badly, but we start out lovely by watching Denise Richards and Aaron Phypers open their wedding presents. I wished we could’ve seen them unwrap the tequila from Dorit Kemsleybut alas Dorit  probably ‘conveniently forgot’ the wedding gift, just like she conveniently forgets to tell her so-called close friend that she gave her dog away to a woman she kinda knows, or doesn’t know, or is an associate of PK’s or is you know, a shelter named A Very Lovely Random Woman.

Tom Schwartz Shares Aftermath Of Ditching Katie Maloney For First Class

Tom Schwartz, can this guy ever get a break? For years, the Vanderpump Rules star has been cowering in the shadow of wife, Katie Maloney. Viewers have seen Tom fail at bartending, have a less-than-stellar performance attempting to work for LVP Sangria, and be brutally insulted on a regular basis by the person he married. When Tom 2 finally gets a job, as a kind-of owner of Tom Tom, along with life-partner Tom Sandoval, Katie complains about that too. Of course, this begs the question, if Katie isn’t complaining, does she have a pulse?

Living this way each day, experiencing the highs and lows of Katie’s mood swings opening a bar, a guy could use some rest and relaxation. Why not a trip to Mexico?! The sun, the sand, good people, and more alcohol than I could consume in a year are on the short list of fun things to do. But wait, Tom 2 and co-star Scheana Marie were randomly upgraded to first class when the gang was boarding the aircraft. Because Katie is so sweet and understanding, she smiled gently at her beloved husband and wished him a good flight… That’s almost as farfetched as Lala Kent being a feminist reconciling with James Kennedy. So how did Katie handle this horrific act of betrayal? Not well, my friends, not well.

Vanderpump-Rules-Lala-Kent

Vanderpump Rules star Lala Kent has lived up to her hashtag #GiveThemLala this season. And not in a good way either. It seems like every week Lala has screamed and wagged her finger into the faces of Billie Lee, Raquel Leviss or James Kennedy. 

She viciously attacked all three cast members during Billie’s brunch event at SUR. Raquel unknowingly lit the fuse to the ticking time bomb when she mentioned that Lala can’t use her dad’s death as an excuse for her behavior. And… kaboom! Lala went off on Raquel, Billie, and James #GiveThemCrazy. After the altercations, Brittany Cartwright was there to calm her down. 

Denise Richards

Denise Richards has been such a breath of fresh air for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. She comes across real, genuine, and having no desire to put on a facade. Plus, it’s nice to see that she’s as confused about the dog drama as we are! However, just because Denise is genuine and authentic doesn’t mean her fellow Housewives are.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills struggle with authenticity. First you have Camille Grammer who very clearly changed personalities between seasons 1 and 2. Brandi Glanville says that Kyle Richards acts one way with Lisa Vanderpump in her life, and another way when they are apart. Most of the cast says LVP is secretly manipulative. Finally, Lisa Rinna openly said she was turning into the “nicest f***ing Lisa Rinna”

Vanderpump Rules in Mexico

Considering that the cast of Vanderpump Rules was in Mexico, drinking their pants off (literally), it’s pretty surprising that last night’s episode was mostly mellow and drama-free.

The only drama was drunk Stassi Schroeder and Beau Clark cry-whining at each other about their relationship values (aka – when, where and at what time it’s acceptable to get wasted), and Beau is so the guy who wipes his snot with the back of his hand, or the corner of his pillow, instead of using a tissue. And Stassi she is so the type who uses an actual human to wipe her snot and blow her nose on, because people are no better than Kleenex. Like Stassi said, “I never get FOMO,” because in Stassi’s world she causes the FOMO. GET THE MEMO, BEAU!

Erika Jayne

Hey, you know what I’ve been wondering?  What Real Housewives of Beverly Hills ice princess extraordinaire, Erika Jayne’s, opinion is on Lisa Vanderpump. Ha! I almost managed that with a straight face.

And let me clarify I use the name ice princess because no way are you to the level of a queen, Erika.  Not even your $40,000 per month glam squad can make you interesting.

Vanderpump-Rules-Jax-Taylor

Jax Taylor IS Vanderpump Rules. Nobody has given us more over seven seasons than Jax. Whether it’s his bad boy beginning, or his newfound changed behavior; he delivers. He tweets his thoughts at all hours and frequently gives fans insight on behind-the-scenes happenings. If anyone is going to be upfront with us about the show, it’s Jax.

Let’s face it. This hasn’t been the greatest season. The saga of everybody versus James Kennedy got old fast. Everyone seems to be growing up and getting their lives together. THIS IS NOT WHAT WE WANT. We miss when the group was constantly at odds. We miss the explosive fights and meltdowns. That is what we need. Thankfully, Jax spilled secrets from the reunion taping, and the tea is HOT.

Lisa Vanderpump

Apparently, Lisa Vanderpump never stops. I am beginning to question whether she is human or a really sophisticated AI cyborg created to make other people feel lazy. The multi-tasking restaurateur has been juggling a tough season on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and opening new LA hotspots on Vanderpump Rules. Now she might be taking her canine rescue organization to the next level with a show about Vanderpump Dogs. All of her success has not come without struggles though. Lisa lost her brother to a drug overdose. Most of her friendships with the RHOBH ladies suffered in the wake of a dog adoption that took a radical left turn.

In spite of personal setbacks, Lisa isn’t finished yet. With the opening of Vanderpump Cocktail Garden in Las Vegas, her reach is only growing wider. Surely her castmates showed up to back this exciting new venture… Right? In the spirit of friendship and forgive and forget? It isn’t like they are jealous of Lisa’s continued achievements, spin-off shows, and successful rosé and sangria lines. So who showed up for Lisa’s fabulous Vegas party? The people she invited, that’s who.