So much reality TV, so little time. We are thankful for DVR since there are a lot of time conflicts with some reality TV great shows. Check out our reality TV listings of shows to watch this week!
Love After Lockup
Again, we must congratulate the stalwart production team of Love After Lockup for going where no man has gone before – specifically, the inside of Clint’s head. Last night gave us more intimate/gaggy moments with ex-inmates, deranged explanations and excuses from two-timing players (looking at you, Michael!), troubling family reunions, and a three-way in the making. Hoorah!
We have a rather large garbage barge of floating debris to wade through from the last Love After Lockup episode. So, let’s get to it, starting with Scott and Lizzie. On their first official “date,” Lizzie reveals her classy side by double fisting drinks and slurping oysters. She even reminded Scott that he ain’t never gonna get any because she’s a woman of God now.
Pro tip: There is no better way to feel absolutely proud of all of your life choices – even those four batches of holiday cookies you ate last week – than to watch this season of Love After Lockup. Seriously, there’s just something wholesome and satisfying about watching some sad sacks roll up in their fresh-outta-prison duds, ready to make all new terrible decisions with a life partner on the outside who is even more unhinged than them. Yes, I am going to hell. (Wanna share a handbasket?)
Speaking of sad sacks on Love After Lockup, let’s check in with Scott and Lizzie! They’re still at the Hampton 8 chilling in separate rooms, but Lizzie thinks it’s time for a makeover. Not for her – nope! She’s perfect
in her own mind. Lizzie wants to pull a Queer Eye for the Toothless Guy on Scott. And she feels very qualified for the job since she was in cosmetology school in prison – even though she got kicked out for heroin. As one does.
Before we recap the wonder that was Love After Lockup this week, let’s offer three cheers and some antibiotics to the brave camera crews who captured this “release day” footage. These hardy souls not only stood by while fresh-out-of-prison folk tongue kissed their lovahs for the first time. Nay! They ventured into woods to record full on sexytimes on dirt piles. I ask you: Can it get any better than this? Hurrah!
Speaking of dirt pile sex, let’s begin with Caitlin and Matt, who cannot wait one more second to jump each other’s bones, so they pull off into the woods to do the deed. This is how you get Lyme’s Disease, but Caitlin calls it the best sex she’s ever had, and Matt is happy he has a girl who doesn’t care about the odd lost tooth or poison sumac up her bum. #SoulMates
WEtv is serving up some serious stank with the season two crew of Love After Lockup, and this Friday night’s show gave us another overflowing-dumptruck-claw of the garbage TV we need in our lives. Mmmm. Smells like
90 day old chicken.
Last week, Lizzie was released from prison, running into the open arms of Scott and knocking one of his 7 teeth to the ground. This week, we pick up with Lizzie’s ride home, which features an all expenses paid shopping spree at the gas station. And we thought fairytales were just for storybooks. Bah!
If we thought Love After Lockup’s premiere episode for Season Two was insane, then we had no idea what WEtv had up its sleeve. Because this week’s Love After Lockup was even better. By better, I mean crazier, messier, and even more whack. Everything we’re looking for in our favorite trash TV show!
Last week, we met three couples plus a thrupple. Yep, one of this season’s inmates, Michael, has TWO women on the outside waiting for him. Neither woman knows the other exists, which will make for an extremely interesting release day. Before we get to this epic disaster, let’s review the progression/regression of events in everyone else’s tale of prison romance.
We asked, we believed, and we received. Love After Lockup is back with a new cast (and some familiar faces) for another season of love, prison-style. YES!!! From the producers who gave us 90 Day Fiance, Sharp Entertainment is bringing us a classic story of true romance: Boy meets girl, they fall in love, boy proposes to girl. Only one minor issue: Boy (or in some cases, girl) is incarcerated in the United States prison system.
If you enjoy hearing lines like, “I was cruising the internet one night and I stumbled across pictures of [prisoner’s name] on meetaninmate.com” as the introductory sentence to an epic love story, then this is the show for you. Our couples this season include two holdovers from Love After Lockup Season One – Scott & Lizzie and Angela & Tony – plus four new couples hoping to make it work on the “outside.” Let’s review who’s been pierced with Cupid’s homemade shiv this year.
This fall and winter are about to get a whole lot better because the geniuses at Sharp Entertainment are giving the people more of what we’re asking for: brand new trainwrecks! Our dearly beloved Love After Lockup is all set to premiere this December on WEtv for its second season, and the OG of TLC’s “90 Day” universe – 90 Day Fiance – will premiere its season 6 installment on October 21. Yes, things are about to get a little bit more stupider.
An all new cast of prison inmates and their pen-pal lovahs will grace our screens for season two of Love After Lockup, and if it’s anything like season one, we are in for a rare treat. Last year we witnessed a Mormon mom marry an ex-gangster, complete with a wedding cake in traditional Crip colors. Really, what more can you ask for?