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Real Housewives Of New Jersey Recap: Orange Theory

So last night’s Real Housewives of New Jersey welcomed Teresa Giudice back into the land of tequila with minimal drama (that’s saved for next week!). Margaret Josephs does her best to be relevant, and while I really like her, she’s sinking down to a level she shouldn’t…or maybe she’s required to–this is reality television after all! Thankfully the kids scenes were kept to a minimum. I know several readers didn’t appreciate my snarky request not to snark on the kids, but we can all agree we are here to snark…I just like keeping it to the adults who signed up for this circus! As always, thank you for reading, and now, let’s get to slinging super bronzed snark!

The RHONJ episode opens with the ladies and their families prepping for their day a la Southern Charm’s formula. Teresa is sharing her very tiny wardrobe for the upcoming bodybuilding competition with daughters Audriana, Gabriella, and Gia. Audriana calls it like she sees it. The outfit is gross and is certainly going to go up her mom’s butt. Teresa shares that she was nervous to tell incarcerated husband Joe Guidice that she was participating in such an event due to his jealous tendencies. She’s relieved that he is not only supportive, but he hopes she wins. Realizing she can’t change her mother’s tiny-weeny-bikini choices, Audriana remembers the ol’ “if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em” mantra and models some seriously killer poses her mom should use on the catwalk.

Jackie Goldschneider Is Selling Knife Jennifer Aydin Gave Her On eBay

Jennifer Aydin came out swinging during last night’s Real Housewives of New Jersey episode. At first, it seemed nice that she brought souvenirs from Turkey for her costars. Then, she “joked” that Margaret Josephs’ gift was “in the mail.” It was a (failed) reference to Margaret referring to Jennifer’s brother’s fiance as a “mail-order bride.”

Then, Jennifer gave Jackie Goldschneider a Turkish knife to “stab her in the back”. Yes, this is about that article Jackie wrote about “spoiled children” after she left Jennifer’s home with its sixteen bathrooms.

 

Real Housewives Of New Jersey Recap:

A very huge thank you to The Marvelous Mrs. Mary for covering the Real Housewives of New Jersey recap last week when I was traveling for my day job. She always calls it like she sees it, and these women require a lot of attention. Finally, Teresa Giudice seems to be getting along with sister-in-law Melissa Gorga and Jackie Goldschneider, the newbie who broke Tre code early on in the season. Jennifer Aydin is still harping on Jackie’s stupid article in the wake of her trip to Turkey. Give it up, already! Does anyone even read this paper they keep mentioning? Sheesh. Even Margaret Josephs has sunk below the fray with her recent comments about Jennifer’s brother’s engagements. Can’t we all just get along? No. I know the answer will always be “no.”

That said, I’d give my eye teeth to watch a Dolores Catania/Danielle Staub smackdown to energize this RHONJ lull! If we can’t have that nugget, I guess I’ll settle for a Marty Caffrey/Joe Benigno Italian grinder seasoned with a Joe Gorga voice of reason. For dessert? A heaping portion of Milania Giudice’s rap debut–mad props to her for having the guts to perform in front of all of those people! I’m full…but these folks are FULL OF IT!

RHONJ-Jennifer-Aydin

Tonight’s Real Housewives of New Jersey episode is a dramatic one for Jennifer Aydin. She gives Jackie Goldschneider a souvenir from Turkey. No, it’s not a peace offering. Instead, it’s a passive aggressive gesture in retaliation for the article Jackie wrote about spoiled children.

Jennifer gives her an ancient Turkish dagger to “stab people in the back.” Did she just realize that she has to make some waves to get a callback for a second season? After bragging about her Paramus mansion for too many episodes to count, Jennifer amping up the drama tonight. Jackie isn’t the only Housewife she fights with.

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With many Real Housewives shows on the decline with drama (looking at you Orange County and Atlanta), the New Jersey ladies have really come through for the viewers when we needed it most. Season 9 is the show’s best season in years. It’s not even over yet, but I cannot wait for the Real Housewives of New Jersey Season 9 reunion. Then again, I really don’t want it to end. I’m torn.

Who am I kidding? The reunion is going to be a screaming match. I’m so here for that. As of this moment, we don’t know exactly what they argued about discussed, but we did get some sneak peaks at their looks thanks to social media. I just want to know if anyone wore Jovani!  Or is that more of a New York City Housewives move? Spoiler alert: there are A LOT of sequins. Oh And spray tans, of course.

Brielle-Biermann

The Real Housewives were all about that mother/daughter time this past week. Real Housewives of New Jersey OG Teresa Giudice celebrated her daughter Gia Giudice’s eighteenth birthday! Yes, you read that correctly. Gia Giudice is eighteen years old. How old do you feel now? Personally, I’m feeling ancient right about now.

Meanwhile, Teresa’s costar Danielle Staub went to a play with her daughter Jillian Staub. Additionally, Kyle Richards posed for a mother/daughter photo with Sophia Umansky. Then, Vicki Gunvalson got her daughter Briana Culberson to wear matching pajamas on a cruise.

RELATED: Instagram Roundup: Teresa Giudice, Stassi Schroeder, Andy Cohen, Craig Conover, & More!

Then, there were some sweet son photos as well. Bachelor alum Sean Lowe hit the beach with his sons Samuel and Isaiah in Hawaii. Also, Dallas Housewife Stephanie Hollman shared a photo with her. Scott Disick posted a photo cuddling with his youngest son Reign.

In other reality star updates, braces are all the rage these days. Kelly Dodd and her ex Michael Dodd took their daughter Jolie to get braces. Yes, they even marked the occasion with a family photo. Which, is actually pretty sweet. 90 Day Fiance alum Anfisa Nava showed off her new braces.

RELATED: Instagram Roundup: MJ Javid, Ashley Martson, Ashton Pienaar, & More!

Stassi Schroeder, Erika Jayne, Kathryn Dennis, and Bethenny Frankel, struck a pose and showed off some chic outfits. Then there are other reality stars who cropped out their outfits and went for the selfies. Luann de Lesseps, D’Andra Simmons, LeeAnne Locken all posted selfies this week.

And of course, as per usual, there were plenty of reality star couple photos on Instagram. Margaret Josephs and husband Joe Benigno went to Miami.  Cynthia Bailey and Kandi Burruss posed for a couples selfie with their men Mike Hill and Todd Tucker.

RELATED: Instagram Roundup: Reza Farahan, Lisa Vanderpump, Captain Lee Rosbach, & More!

Click through the photo gallery below to see all of those pictures and more from this week’s Instagram Roundup.

TELL US- WHAT ARE YOUR FAVORITE PHOTOS FROM THIS EDITION OF INSTAGRAM ROUNDUP? WHICH REALITY STARS DO YOU WANT TO SEE MORE PHOTOS OF? DO YOU WANT TO SEE MORE REALITY STAR KIDS ON THEIR SHOWS?

[Feature Photo Credit: Instagram]

Photos From Xfinity Realty Bar In Miami- Margaret Josephs, JWoww, Jordan Kimball, & More!

Miami was the place to be this week for the reality TV super fans. Lots of your favorite cast members from Real Housewives of New Jersey, Jersey Shore, and The Bachelorette gathered in the Sunshine State. The Xfinity Reality Bar is Miami is the world’s largest bar dedicated to reality television and its fans.

Xfinity Reality Bar is more than just a bar. It’s a reality TV experience designed to cater to the biggest reality television fans. The bar is full of reality TV memorabilia, including the legendary Jersey Shore duck phone.

Danielle Staub Sold Wedding Ring To Pay Lawyer; Lindsay Lohan Denies Hookup With Jax Taylor

Last night’s episode of Watch What Happens Live was chock full of shade. Danielle Staub (shockingly) owned up to her bridezilla antics. Lindsay Lohan’s Beach Club namesake Lindsay Lohan talked Real Housewives and her rumored hook up with Jax Taylor. Host Andy Cohen was loving every second of it and so was I.