*sigh* So many thoughts about last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of New York. SO. MANY. THOUGHTS. And even more questions!
Does Luann de Lesseps deserve the wrath of hungover Housewives? Does air conditioner make Sonja Morgan poof or poop? Does Bethenny Frankel see Luann as her human sounding board – the one person resilient enough to take all the tantrums Bethenny’s mother ignored as she headed out to the clubs or on a date; giving Bethenny free-reign to project all of her childhood emotions.
Also, it occurs to me, that Bethenny probably married her mother and her father in Jason Hoppy, who seems diabolical, but also really disinterested in her melodrama, and Bethenny needs someone to give validity to her hysteria or else she thinks they don’t ‘hear’ her.
Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave has been busy this season on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills. She helped propagate the dumbest storyline puppygate and told off a vulnerable Lisa Vanderpump. Teddi wore out her fingers out texting John Sessa Blizzard (I still don’t care). She also decided to pay a stylist who obviously hates her to try to level up with the other women. Oh, and did I mention she’s busy now Kyle Richards’ mouthpiece?
Remember earlier this season when she was complaining about doing LVP’s dirty work? Now she’s happily doing Kyle’s! For their first night out in Provence, the ladies went all out by wearing black. (I’m still not over the memory of Dorit Kemsely’s feather leather jacket). The women also tried something new by attempting to deliver in a scene. With Kyle at the helm now, she and Teddi tried to start some drama by calling out Lisa Rinna’s behavior at Farrah-ween. Honestly, I think the only person truly offended by Rinna’s awful Erika Jayne impersonation was Kyle. Yes, everyone was cringing. But Kim Richards even forgave Rinna! So, Kyle we get it. You need to harp on this because LVP has left the building you were personally traumatized. The only person on Kyle’s side here was Teddi.
The Real Housewives Of New York don’t even have to leave their luxury beach house to have insane, intense, authentic drama. The Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills can travel halfway around the world, be in insanely luxe settings, and still can’t make anything interesting occur.
Tonight the Real Housewives Of New York are still terrorizing Miami and if you can believe it they’ve only been there two days real time! After Sonja Morgan got so drunk she needed paramedics, Bethenny Frankel, Ramona Singer, and Luann de Lesseps sit her down to warn her about the perils of alcoholism. Not all alkies wind up being a cabaret star, you know!
Tanya Sam was a new addition to Real Housewives of Atlanta in Season 11. She appeared as a Friend of the Housewives. Initially, Tanya was brought on as NeNe Leakes’ friend. Oh, how that changed during the season!
NeNe became angry when she thought that Tanya dissed NeNe’s store, Swagg Boutique, during the Housewives talent show in Florida. NeNe later said that Tanya was obsessed with labels. (Hello–have you met your fellow Housewives? And looked in a mirror lately, NeNe?) In Tokyo, the ladies each got a fortune at a temple. NeNe said that Tanya’s fortune meant that she might not marry her fiancé, Paul Judge. NeNe blew up (as she typically does) when Tanya was upset over the way that NeNe shaded her relationship. Later, Bravo officially changed Tanya to Eva Marcille’s friend. Well played, Bravo. Well played.
Candiace Dillard continues to tread into the waters of conflict. None of her Real Housewives of Potomac castmates back up her persistent questioning of Ashley Darby’s intentions concerning motherhood. So far, Candiace hasn’t justified her position enough and the other ladies are speculating that she is simply projecting issues with her mother onto Ashley.
As if the Candiace and Ashley conflict wasn’t enough, Karen Huger is crossing boundaries with Gizelle Bryant. She has been bringing up Gizelle’s ex Sherman Douglas. If the two were truly friends, perhaps it wouldn’t feel like an attack on Gizelle’s privacy. But clearly, Karen has an ulterior motive.
Last night the Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills traveled to France to visit glorious Provence. Of course these women couldn’t just enjoy the sites and each other’s company, and a new Lisa was thrown under the Peugeot wheels!
Here we are at the Chateau Ventoux, which according to Lisa Rinna is “like Downton France Abbey” except in France an Abbey is a nunnery, so LOL. (If I’m wrong here don’t bother correcting me because I like my joke). The rooms are all beautiful. The surroundings are lush. And unlike when PK smothers her with potato chip crumbs and calls it a blanket, Dorit Kemsley feels like a princess. A real live European princess, who any moment will be woken from this nightmare by a prince who doesn’t have financial problems and will carpet their castle in athleisure wear made by Givenchy and Beverly Reach. Life, really will have purpose for this girl from London, Connecticut.
On last night’s episode of Texicanas, was another day, another drama. Mayra Farret discovered that some of the ladies may not be her true friends. She reads secret messages that no one thought she would ever see. Hmmm…. What goes on in the dark always comes to light. That is why I find it best to always be correct. Anyone who I have an issue with definitely knows it!!!! Honestly, I am starting to feel like Mayra has fallen from grace with the ladies and several are happy about it. It’s hard being a woman at times, cattiness seems to come with the territory.
Karla Ramirez meets her husband, Manoli Ramirez at their club to get everything ready for their “Havana Nights” one-year anniversary party. The night of the party, the club is packed and all the ladies come to celebrate. One would think that this event would be drama free, but not with this group. Karla and Mayra made up at the “sip and see”, but all does not seem to be well. Karla is upset because Mayra still hasn’t purchased the jewelry that she asked to put on hold. She also hasn’t told her that changed her mind. Sigh… I swear these ladies handle conflict more like high school girls, rather than middle-aged women. Karla, instead of ignoring your friend all night, simply tell her you are going to sell the piece if it’s not purchased by a certain date. Why does this have to become such a telenovela???
Tonight you can take the Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills out of dog crap drama, but you can’t take the drama out of the Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills – especially when they’re in France!
What starts out as a lovely vacation in an exclusive French villa, prompting Dorit Kemsley to exclaim that it feels like they’re all in Europe, quickly erupts into mayhem when Teddi Mellencamp Arroyave believes all the world’s – and all the Housewives’ – problems are her bones to pick. Lady get a life and let things go.