Comscore

Ryhlee Gerber

Chandler Brooks

Well that didn’t take long, did it? Before Below Deck‘s first charter even ended there’s already major drama between Chandler Brooks and lowest deckhand on the totem pole, Rhylee Gerber.

You could’ve spotted Ryhlee riding the crazy train from a mile away; tooting her horn and waving a flag that reads “SS ATTENTION WHORES.” It’s always the ones who go overboard trying to prove they’re normal that cause the most mess! Of course, Chandler isn’t doing himself any favors trying to run this boat like his name is Captain Lee Rosbach when he’s merely a bosun and his second in command Ross Inia is basically doing all the work.

Chandler’s little lips are so pinched they’re the tightest burrito Chipotle ever rolled and any Real Housewife worth her margarita salt would warn him about the wrinkles this will cause. As it stands Chandler and Rhylee are on two opposite ends of the reality TV spectrum and need to stop playing tug-a-war before it becomes an all-out war. Oh, wait… too late!

Below Deck Season 5 Premiere

Do my eyes deceive me? What of my ears?! Is it possible that Below Deck is filled with competent individuals who actually know what they’re doing in? Ahoy new maties, but I know y’all are not just professional yachties but professional drama-starters too.

After the devastation in the Caribbean Captain Lee Rosbach is anxious to explore the uncharted territory of Tahiti. Captain Lee fancies himself a regular-old Ponce de Leonce, explorer of a vast new world. Joining him to conquer the alcoholics of the high seas, is his intrepid first mate Kate “Champagne Is My Personal Jesus” Chastain.