Sister Wives Recap

Greetings, dear readers. I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. TLC clearly wanted to prolong your celebration by giving you an extra hour of the premiere of Sister Wives for which you can be grateful. Twice the Kody Brown follicles, twice the teen wedding shenanigans! We’ve got double the Christine happy pills, Janelle frankness, and Meri passive aggression. Robyn was there as well. 🙂 Fix up a turkey sandwich with those amazing leftovers, and prepare to roll your eyes at the antics of the Brown family.

As the super-sized season begins, the Browns are ecstatic about Madison’s upcoming wedding which, in TV time, is two month away. Maddie asks Truely if she’ll be the flower girl. The wives joke about pulling off a traditional wedding given polygamist ceremonies are quiet and low key with minimal guests. Christine’s got jokes (they won’t be mothers-in-law, more like outlaws!), and everyone seems to be genuinely getting along on the velour sofa. Christine has clearly upped her meds given Mykelti’s news that she’s ready to marry her boyfriend of five months. She has to approach Kody before Tony asks for his daughter’s hand. She calls her husband, and Kody is prepared for the worst even though he’s very used to getting urgent texts and calls from his wives about something important. Christine regrets how her initial conversation went with Mykelti – she wasn’t excited or supportive.

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“Nothing is off limits,” she said. “A two hour honest discussion,” she said. All I heard coming out of Erica Hill’s mouth at the beginning of last night’s Sister Wives tell-all was “TWOHOURSTWOHOURSTWOHOURS!!!” But, if we’re going to get some dirt on the Browns, I’m in for sure. The sit down starts with the easy stuff…Kody and Robyn’s new daughter Aria. Kody brags about how much the baby loves him, and Janelle and Christine get emotional seeing footage of the birth for the first time. The group discusses hospital births in the polygamist community, and Kody says he’s ready to grow up and stop having kids, although he realizes the decision is out of his hands. Robyn plays coy about whether she will have more children.

Erica highlights Robyn’s feisty behavior throughout her pregnancy, and Kody seems genuinely peeved that his other wives found her curtness towards him to be hilarious. The group jokes about the perks of the women overlapping with their pregnancies since it allowed Meri to help breast feed Maddie when Janelle didn’t produce enough milk. While that didn’t bond the pair back in the day, Meri and Janelle are now working on their relationship. When asked if they consider themselves to be friends Janelle quietly nods as Meri offers up an unconvincing, “I think so.” Janelle cites that Christine is the good common denominator that helped them get along. When Erica asks about individual relationships, Kody doesn’t understand the question. As he tries to talk over Christine, his giggly third wife patiently explains what Erica was asking. Erica already seems over Kody.

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Aloha Browns! Last night’s Sister Wives marked the conclusion of the Browns Hawaiian vacation. If the older children keep finding themselves in serious relationships, there will be enough wedding story lines to keep this show afloat for many more seasons to come! The crew is headed to a local coffee house for breakfast, but Christine has taken to calling it a bistro since the LDS Church frowns upon coffee. Kody is frustrated with the driving and parking. He’s having a difficult time hanging loose, and Caleb seems to be getting a healthy dose of his future father-in-law.

Over breakfast, Kody lectures his family about how he’s the boss, but his kids are rolling their eyes and hoping he’ll chill so they can enjoy breakfast. After their meal, the Browns head to the beach, and Kody sets up the umbrellas in the hot sand. Christine notes that he’s making their area in sad too hot to play on, so Meri plays the messenger and gets Kody to move them. Of course, he’s peeved that his idea was once again thwarted. Hopefully once everyone is allowed to finally have some fun, he’ll relax.

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It’s a Sister Wives miracle! Last night’s episode was only an hour long! Yeah, yeah, there was an hour long special afterwards, but the producers weren’t trying to drag out thirty minutes worth of the Browns’ story lines into two hours of show. Ariella May is now four-weeks-old, and the family has enjoyed passing her around. Christine is addicted to holding the baby, and Robyn believes her broken collarbone is healing nicely. The wives coo over how precious the baby is and Kody delights in doing impressions of his newborn daughter. However, he questions Robyn if she feels comfortable taking a new baby to Hawaii. If Robyn stays home with Aria, Kody reminds his wife that Solomon will have to stay behind as well. 

It’s back to the therapist’s office for Meri and Janelle, and Nancy wants to know if the pair was successful with their dual decorating project at Thanksgiving. Janelle hedges around the fact that Meri spear-headed the project with little input from her, and she tries to get her point across delicately and without blame. Of course, Meri is glaring down Janelle like she’s responsible for the catfishing. Meri interjects to add she’d hoped that Janelle would have participated more and had more of a voice. The women nervously laugh at their inability to communicate. Janelle suggests that the two try again on their upcoming trip to Hawaii. Meri isn’t feeling it. Christine and Robyn are hopeful that their sister wives will build a friendship. 

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I’m going out on a limb here and betting that last night’s Sister Wives was longer than Robyn Brown’s actual labor. Baby Sister arrived last night, and Kody cites that Robyn is far more independent with this pregnancy than she was with Solomon. We are treated to highlights of Robyn’s frustrations with Kody over the last several weeks, and both agree that their emotional connection isn’t what it was with the last. Robyn has felt “off” the entire time, and she tends to listen to her intuition which worries Kody to no end. 

Baby Sister will be Kody’s eighteenth child. The family reminisces about firstborn Logan. He was born to Janelle after Kody had married his first three wives. Christine got pregnant not long after marrying Kody. Meri gave birth to Mariah a few short months after Christine gave birth to Aspyn. Madison came next, and Janelle had a difficult time producing enough milk. Maddie wasn’t gaining weight, so Meri stepped in to breast feed. As Kody’s brood got bigger, he felt more scrutiny from employers and customers. Many of Christine and Janelle’s pregnancies overlapped. While it’s a bit odd to think about, the family videos of the kids are adorable. 

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How much footage does TLC have of Meri tearfully talking about her catfishing? Clearly a ton, as we’re back to supersized Sister Wives episodes. At least Mariah gets her waterworks honestly! The two hours begin with Maddie shopping for her wedding dress. Kody Brown is upset to learn that his daughter doesn’t want him tagging along. She wants her dad to see the dress for the first time before he walks her down the aisle. Kody is doubly concerned when Caleb mentions he’ll be wearing khakis. Jake from State Farm? She sounds hideous! 

The nearest bridal salon doesn’t know what hit it when Madison arrives with her mother Janelle, Meri, Christine, Robyn, and Robyn’s full-time nanny niece. Also in tow are her sisters Aspyn, Mykelti, and Mariah, who will serve as bridesmaids, as well  as her best friend and maid-of-honor, Desi. Maddie is a smart girl, so she’s not allowing everyone in her entourage to pull dresses. They need to have a seat while she works with Desi and a salesperson. Meri is upset that she doesn’t get to help pick out a dress for the big day. She also demands to know if Maddie wants all of her mother’s sister wives to serve as mothers of the bride. Given that Mariah wants a plural marriage, I’m sure Meri will have the opportunity to shop with her daughter and all Mariah’s future sister wives. 

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The network has finally heard my prayers. Thank you, TLC, for only subjecting us to an hour of Sister Wives last night. It’s much more fun to watch when I don’t have to see the same story dragging on for two hours on a Sunday. Plus, Kody Brown’s hair is so special and magical, it doesn’t need to risk overexposure to the fans. Same goes for Meri’s catfishing wet bar! 

The Browns are expecting seventy people for Thanksgiving–you know that means! It’s a reason for a party! Janelle and Meri will be decorating for the holiday after a successful first counseling session, and Christine and Robyn plan to sit back and stay out of the way. Christine is actually less annoying and completely reasonable this season. Who knew that would happen?

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Did the producers of Sister Wives end up with so much extra footage that two hour episodes sounded like a good idea? Are they hoping if they show more of Meri Brown’s catfishing, Nev and Max will suddenly want to collaborate? It’s just too much of a good thing–in this case Kody’s luscious locks–if you ask me.

Kody wants to help Meri feel more love and support, but he’s not sure how to go about it. He believes the therapy session was helpful, but he wants to make sure that the group continues to handle the situation with kindness. Janelle realizes that it’s not enough to tell her that she’s included in the family, they need to show her. Of course, there is other stuff going on with the crew besides the catfishing. Aspyn and Mykelti have come to the end of their year lease, and the sisters are totally over living together. Aspyn is moving back home, but not into Christine’s house because she tends to butt heads with her mother when it comes to how to raise her younger siblings. She’s going to be living at Robyn’s, and Christine admits it will be an adjustment. Mykelti is moving to Utah to work for her dad’s friend as she takes time off from UNLV. College is hard, and she’s not ready to grow up quite yet. 

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