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Last night’s Mob Wives was an all out war — the weapons of choice? Acrylic nails, silicone and weave. It was quite a battle!

At Big Ang’s request, Drita D’Avanzo agrees to try to mend fences with Karen Gravano. Drita attempts to apologize, but Karen isn’t having one second of it. They are back to the conversation on the rooftop last season. Big Ang mistakenly thinks things are copasetic as she watches from a distance. Um. Karen accuses Drita of claiming she put Karen in the hospital. Drita never said that… but she did hear it, and it seemed plausible as Drita typically puts people in the hospital.

Ramona approaches, reminding the ladies that Renee’s birthday isn’t the time of place. Drita swings at her and it is an all out hair pulling brawl. Ramona won’t let go of Drita’s hair, no matter how much Derek Tobacco (what a great name!) tries to stop her. Ramona’s mouth is bleeding (or is that smeared lipstick? Nah, totes blood) and Karen is threatening Drita with “her bloodline.”

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As reality fights go, it’s pretty solid. Renee is beyond livid that her friends would choose to throw down at her birthday party. Ramona thinks it was Derek who bloodied her mouth and she keeps screaming she’s going to kill him. It’s time to take off the shoes and start running. Renee is upset that Drita thinks this whole situation was a set up and she can’t believe that Ramona is accusing Derek of hitting her. Renee gets Drita into a van and begins screeching at her friend, demanding to know what happened. Drita is hysterical… and not crying hysterical, crazy hysterical.

Back inside the party, Karen is explaining to Big Ang that her attempt to reconcile the former friends went totally sour. Karen is way tougher and harder and punker than Drita. She’s a bigger fighter, a bigger hard a$$… you get the picture. Big Ang, my new favorite, just looks over it. Back in the sketchy van, Drita continues to cry “set-up” to which Renee screams that her son would die of cancer before she’d ever set Drita up. Ahh, I think a simple, “no I didn’t” would be better. She also offers to let Drita punch her in the face if she truly believes Renee would do such a thing.

Derek Tobacco makes the stupid decision to go back into the party. Ramona sees him and goes ballistic. It’s amazing that it takes several giant men to hold back these little ladies. Not to be outdone, Karen goes equally ballistic. Karen starts throwing plates while Derek takes refuge on the balcony. One boob exposed, Ramona tries to wreak havoc on Derek. Renee kicks everyone out of her party, while Karen tries to get the guys on her side, telling Junior and company that some dude hit Ramona in her face. Renee and Karen get into a screaming match and Renee pleads with Junior to take her home — but Junior and company is ready to kick Derek’s hiney. He manages one good punch into the van before it speeds off into the night.

Big Ang is realizing she may not have a career as a mediator. She can’t believe no one even got to sing or eat cake before the fight started. Carla is pretty relieved she didn’t receive an invitation to Renee’s party. She leaves a message for Drita to find out if all the rumors she is hearing are true. Back at Renee’s house, she is explaining the background of the fight to Junior and AJ. Over lunch, Karen and Ramona can’t believe that Drita ruined Renee’s party. Yeah, it was just her. Karen thinks its hilarious she blackened Drita’s eye. Ramona finally admits that poor Derek didn’t hit her — Drita’s ring nicked her face. Junior tries to teach Renee that you should never put two people that hate each other in the same room with alcohol. He reveals that he apologized to Derek for the “misunderstanding.”

Carla comes over to Drita’s house to hear the full story. Drita’s eye is totally bloodshot and bruised. Drita reminds Carla that if Karen didn’t want people to know she went to the hospital after their last brawl, she shouldn’t have gone to the Staten Island ER, as all their friends work there. Drita is adamant she didn’t make up that rumor. Carla thinks that Ramona is nothing but an instigator.

Ramona and Karen spend the day in Little Italy. The pair goes to Mob Scene, which is a gallery devoted to mob memorabilia. Karen tells the gentlemen running the gallery how her father got his “the Bull” nickname and admits that she knew that her family was connected to the mob at an early age. Ramona, however, didn’t have a clue her family had any times to crime families until she was older. It turns out the Al Pacino’s character in the movie Donny Brasco is a depiction of her grandfather. She recounts meeting Al Pacino on set and telling him what a family man her grandfather was.

Junior is going to court to hopefully negotiate a plea bargain (he’s currently awaiting sentencing in a giant mob bust). Junior is a two-time felon and Renee is hoping for the best for her ex-husband, but she’s bracing for the worst. After his hearing, he’s looking at 15-20 months in jail, but he won’t be sentenced for at least six months. Junior reveals that watching Renee go through her horrendous surgery made him realize how much she means to him. Renee tears up as he approaches a reconciliation, but she is worried about his past infidelity. She is hopeful that things will work out between them.

Next week, Junior and Renee have a romantic dinner where she reminds him what a cheater he was in the past. Carla and Renee face off over Carla’s absence during her post-surgery trauma. Ramona goes to jail.

WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE? WHO WAS IN THE WRONG DURING THAT BRAWL? SHOULD RENEE TAKE BACK JUNIOR?

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