Reality Tea

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF DALLAS -- Season:2 -- Pictured: (l-r) Kameron Westcott, D'Andra Callway Simmons, Brandi Redmond, Carey Deuber, Stephanie Hollman, LeeAnn Locken -- (Photo by: Michael Larsen/F. Scott Schafer/Bravo)

They’re back – well most of them anyway! Bravo just announced that The Real Housewives of Dallas season 2 will kick off on Monday, August 14, 2017.  Returning cast members Cary Deuber, Stephanie Hollman, LeeAnne Locken and Brandi Redmond will be joined by newcomers D’Andra Simmons and Kameron Westcott. The only former Housewife not along for the season 2 ride is Tiffany Hendra.

The press release promises boatloads of crazy as LeeAnne tries to repair her reputation and her friendships and even dabbles in some anger management. We’ll also see a strain between besties Brandi and Stephanie while Cary tries to balance home and work. We will be introduced to neighbors D’Andra and Kameron, who quickly become a part of the drama.

THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ORANGE COUNTY -- Season:12 -- Pictured: Vicki Gunvalson -- (Photo by: Tommy Garcia/Bravo)

The Real Housewives of Orange County Season 12 premiere reminded us all that it’s Vicki Gunvalson’s world and we’re all just living in it. Everything on this show revolves around Vicki. Shannon Beador even had the nerve to blame Vicki for her weight gain, which is absurd. Needless to say, it looks like this season will be a battle of Vicki and Kelly Dodd vs. Shannon and Tamra Judge.

The first episode was full of shit talking, and of course everyone is trying to get the fandom on their side with their Bravo blog posts.

Bethenny Frankel

For the most part, the Real Housewives of New York cast is full of dynamic characters. No matter what you think about Bethenny Frankel, Ramona Singer, Luann de Lesseps, Sonja Morgan, and Dorinda Medley, you have to admit that they really bring it as cast members. Excluding some people from that list is my subtle way of saying who the boring ones are. Why are they on the cast when there are so many viable candidates in New York City?

Even Bethenny herself wants a more diverse cast. The part about some people being boring was just my own personal commentary, but my point is that there are is definitely some dead weight on this show and that in combination with Bethenny’s wish for diversity can go hand in hand. Andy Cohen, are you listening? Drop those other two and spice up the show.

Kenya-Moore-Marc-Daly

This Kenya Moore marriage mystery is still going on. She is milking this situation for all that she possibly can. From secretly getting married outside of the country, to not revealing Marc Daly’s name immediately, every teeny bit of information is getting released piece by piece. As annoying as it is, she has the fans (and haters) captivated.

Now, the question is whether or not this dude will appear on Real Housewives of Atlanta. Apparently he has no interest in being on reality television, but how is Kenya going to stay with a man who won’t be on a show about her life? That is the real question these days. Unfortunately, I have no insight about who will appear on the next RHOA season. All I have to work with is social media and Marc just made a big appearance on Kenya’s Instagram account.

Dance Moms recap

After getting convicted for twenty counts of fraud in the most public way possible, former Dance Moms star Abby Lee Miller is set to start her prison sentence tomorrow in California. Going to jail for fraud is such a #TotalRealityStarMove at this point, so this really isn’t unusual, but it will (hopefully) be a major wake up call for the notoriously difficult dance teacher.

Even though her team has moved on with Cheryl Burke as their coach, she still has one big scene to film for the show that put her in the limelight. Yes, the Lifetime cameras will actually be present when Abby turns herself in.

wwhl-tamra-judge-shep-rose

Last night was a big night for Bravo viewers. Real Housewives of Orange County returned for its twelfth season and part one of the Southern Charm reunion aired. That’s why it made so much sense for Tamra Judge and Shep Rose to stop by the Watch What Happens Live clubhouse to talk with Andy Cohen.

Of course that included Tamra throwing shade at Vicki Gunvalson and Shep showcasing his extensive vocabulary.

SOUTHERN CHARM --

The Southern Charm reunions have certainly come a long way from those initial clubhouse sessions, but do we ever get to hear exactly what we’re hoping to hear? It’s usually just one giant tease, but at least we got our fair share of veiled threats and backhanded accusations on last night’s first installment with less screaming, for once. Andy Cohen begins by congratulating Craig Conover on passing the bar. He compliments the fierceness of Kathryn Dennis hair (RIP bump-its and bad extensions, thank goodness) while refraining from comment on her busted Scarlett O’Hara knock-off. Andy is happy to learn that Shep Rose has escaped the lingering enzyme, Thomas Ravenel loves being Mr. Mom (when he makes it out to the guest house), and Cameran Eubanks is glowing with a baby girl due in November. Mentioning Cam could name her daughter Landon, Andy basically skips over Landon Clements before announcing newbie Austen Kroll (Shep 2.0) has a nice ass. It’s not a lie!

The evening begins with some jovial Craig bashing as Shep teases him about being a jealous, lying wannabe mediator with no game whatsoever (so I’m paraphrasing). Craig cites quality over quantity when it comes to past hook-ups after Shep jokes that Craig sleeps in the bed with girls without even trying anything. Craig correctly reminds Shep that being respectful is far better than Shep’s nightly kiss-and-tells. Focusing more on the embroidery king, the jabs at Craig’s domesticity abound save for Cameran gushing about the onesie he created. Craig is a hobbyist, and he sits quietly as his friends tease him about going into gardening law. Shep jokes that Craig’s long-winded responses would make him a fortune as an attorney who is paid by the hour.

The Real Housewives of Orange County - Season 12

Washing up on the shores of the California beaches, amid the shells and driftwood, is the rubble of last season’s Real Housewives Of Orange County. Littering the sands with shards of shattered friendships, filthy accusations, and broken down dignities; a bent halo, some empty vodka and champs bottles, and Shannon Beador‘s former self, now soaked and waterlogged by the hours of tears she’s spilled over the terrible lies Vicki Gunvalson told. The fate of the world, and the Orange County coastline — along with the safety and health of Briana’s children – all rests in Vicki’s handbag! Thankfully she’s not crazy or anything…

So the taglines: let’s start there. What makes Tamra Judge “highly prized”? Or was she just proud of herself for coming up with a rhyme. Hook’d on Phonics worked for her! Vicki’s tagline informs us that she’s not going home, but what she means is that this show is her home, and you are not going to drop any interloping houses on her head! She clicked her ruby slippers together three times and dragged Briana from the land of tornadoes to get here.