Reality Tea

mob wives brittany

Put a fork in Mob Wives…it’s done. Just don’t put a fork in Brittany Fogarty’s hand because she’s likely to gouge out Marissa’s eyes. That was one of the most comical wannabe smack downs in reality television history. Marissa in her stilettos and Victoria’s Secret get-up managed to get the only punch in on the farmer newbie. Farmer Brittany tried her best to get in a swing, scaling fences and wriggling out of the umpteen bouncers trying to contain her as she and not-so-prissy Marissy scream c-u-next-Tuesday insults that would make Ericka Jayne blush. Karen Gravano is disappointed. She had high hopes that the newbies could have a civil discussion. So Karen’s a “do as I say, not as I do” kind of person. That’s rich! Drita D’avanzo stays in Brittany’s corner like the little old guy who coached Rocky in the ring. Drita knows what it’s like to want to fight someone but be stopped by production assistants or, I don’t know, the police. Seriously, did you see this on TMZ? Girlfriend needs to take it down a notch.

Karen is peeved that Drita is encouraging Brittany. Brittany is peeved that Karen is being Switzerland in this altercation. The following day, Drita and Big Ang plan a big day of inspiration for Drita’s memoir. They are dining at a restaurant that was a mobsters’ strip club dream back in the day. Speaking of back in the day, don’t take a drink every time one of the women utters the phrase…alcohol poisoning doesn’t look fun. While Drita’s husband Lee isn’t keen on the idea of his wife penning a book, Ang believes he’ll come around and be proud of the finished product. Across town, Renee Graziano is thrilled to have son AJ and his girlfriend Andrea spending the night. Thankfully, Renee did a better decorating job the second time around, sans weed. Renee’s rules include AJ doing the laundry and no loud sex. AJ just needs snacks, Gatorade, and his mother not to make comments that make his girlfriend physically cringe.

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Teresa Giudice

Part two, the question and answer segment, of Teresa Giudice‘s interview on Watch What Happens Live aired tonight.

A viewer points out that the Real Housewives of New Jersey star still hasn’t admitted to committing fraud, only signing papers, and that it makes her want to flip a table. To that, Teresa says, “Flip a table.”

Teresa‘s average day in prison: get up at 6:30, check email, yoga, walk or run the outside track, eat lunch, have coffee, watch CNN, take a nap, get up, work out again, count time at 4:00, work out again, eat dinner, have coffee, work out again, watch TV, go to bed. “I did have a job on Wednesdays, Thursdays, and Fridays. After breakfast, I would wipe down the tables. That was my job.”

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Little Women: Atlanta star Minnie Ross

Not only does Minnie Ross very much appear to be in a relationship with Pastor Troy, Minnie is apparently pregnant!  According to sources the Little Women: Atlanta star just found out she’s expecting Troy’s baby and they couldn’t be more excited.

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Kristen Doute

While appearing on Watch What Happens Live on Monday night it slipped that Kristen Doute had recently been kicked out of PUMP by Lisa Vanderpump. Kristen ‘Plead the 5th’ on what exactly happened to get her expelled, but later  spilled the information on twitter. 

According to Kristen the Vanderpump Rules star was doing promotion for WWHL when a drunk James Kennedy became aggressive towards her but Lisa blamed Kristen. 

Lisa told me I’m not welcome at Pump anymore after sloppy, drunk James got in my/Carter’s face. I was there to do something for #WWHL,” accused Kristen. Carter is Kristen’s new boyfriend. Lisa immediately replied that Kristen’s recollection wasn’t true. 

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Lisa Rinna & Yolanda Foster

Lisa Rinna has a big mouth and she is tired of keeping it closed! Yolanda Foster was caught implicating Lipsa in a lie about Lisa Vanderpump claiming Yolanda’s children Bella and Anwar do not have Lyme Disease. After seeing Yolanda manipulating her Real Housewives Of Bevelry Hills co-stars on last night’s episode, Lisa can stay quiet no more! 

Yolanda wants our sympathy, just not our questions, but according to Lipsa she can’t have it both ways. Agreed! 

Lisa and Yolanda erupted in a twitter battle over the contentious episode. Yolanda defended using Lipsa, then lectured her for confronting Erika Giradi to get the truth. Yolanda also believes her actions were justified because she was defending her children 

Lipsa goes IN on Yolanda and her questionable behavior. It is awesome. I am here for it. All day everyday and twice on Sundays! 

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Lisa Rinna confronts Erika Jayne

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star Lisa Rinna is not here for Yolanda Foster twisting the truth, nor Erika Jayne avoiding the truth. About last night’s episode, she blogged, “Well now. That was something, wasn’t it?”

Lisa brought attention to the fact that she said she was happy to move forward with Yolanda in her blog last week, adding, “Clearly, I was the only one who felt this way, because she certainly didn’t have any intention of letting me move forward based on the way she used me as a scapegoat with Lisa Vanderpump and Kyle Richards during their lunch.”

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Erika Girardi gets defensive over Yolanda's Lymes

Erika Girardi-Jayne showed some colors that weren’t pink and sparkly, but rather murky and c-nty on last night’s episode of Real Housewives Of Beverly Hills. If there are two definitions of the word “c-u-next-Tuesday-y,” Erika gave us both in the form of new personality called Erika Payne. I expected a little more honesty from Erika. We’re talking about a woman who prances around with her hoohah out lecturing about confidence and self-acceptance, yet she effortlessly lied to a group of women, not caring that one of them could lose friends over it. Interesting indeed, Ms. Hoohah of the Beverly Hills. Are the Lymes of Yolanda Foster worth all that? 

I really like Erika in general, outside of her relationship with Yolanda in which she is being used (willingly? accidentally?) as a patsy for whatever game it is Yolanda is playing. The reunion should be very interesting! 

On the bright side Eileen Davidson melts my heart for being so down-to-earth, silly, and admitting that she doesn’t give a flying $4,000 designer f–k about materialism. Eileen truly has confidence and doesn’t need all the trappings of attention-seeking “c-nty” necklaces to get a reaction out of “old women,” or the inflated status that swinging around a designer bag gives you. She’s as anti-Hollywood Friend as you can get, without needing some sort of validating T-Shirt proclaiming, “Proud To Not Be A Hollywood Friend #DreamTeam” – you know, the BS Yolanda is always shoving in everyone’s face to make them question themselves. Eileen is my Spirit Housewife. 

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dance moms mothers abby

Last night marked Abby Lee Miller’s return to Dance Moms, and it was every bit as ridiculous as every other episode has been for the last few seasons. Please, Lifetime, put this show out of its misery…it’s not fun to watch any more. It’s borderline disturbing. Abby is having some sort of passive aggressive psychotic break on camera, calmly telling the veteran mothers that she was on vacation last week and doesn’t give a flip about the elite team. She’s only back in the studio because her lawyers need to get paid. As Holly leads the charge to pepper Abby with questions, Abby dismisses her with glassy eyes and flippant remarks. 

Before the pyramid, Abby criticizes the routines that she wasn’t in the attendance to watch. The minis are included in the pyramid, with the entire crew rounding out the bottom rung. Peyton is in the last place spot for her mother’s deplorable behavior. Abby clearly doesn’t like a mom’s bad behavior being worse than her own, right? JoJo, Brynn, and Kendall make up the next level for their various flawed performances, and Nia and Kalani are in third and second. Abby is shocked that Nia didn’t excel more in African dance given that she’s African-American. No, just no. Holly loses it. Just because Nia’s black doesn’t mean she’s got the lock on African dancing. Abby barely back pedals…she didn’t mean to offend anyone, she just thinks that Nia needs to step up to the plate. MacKenzie takes the top spot. The girls will be dancing a lyrical piece with Brynn in the lead role. Abby warns Brynn that if the elite team loses it will be her fault. Jill takes the opportunity to remind everyone that Ashlee never finds Brynn at fault for anything. Shut it, Jill. Seriously, she is sounding like a broken record. Some mini whose name I’m not going to bother to learn is granted a solo.

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