Kim Kardashian And Kanye West Require Two Pools With Their New Home. Shocking.

Kim Kardashian rings in the New Year at 1 Oak Nightclub at The Mirage Resort and Casino Las Vegas, NV

It's official!  Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are moving in together.  Unfortunately for us, the house is on this planet.  Despite my best efforts to convince Sir Richard Branson, he refuses to offer them a free space flight and leave them stranded on the moon.  I really tried to pull some strings.  Sorry.

As you all can imagine, the tiny rapper and his poorly dressed lady love (I have to remind y'all of this.  Seriously?) aren't just moving into any house.  To paraphrase a drunk Kanye, I'm gonna let you talk, but this is the best house of all time.  For realsies. 


The dynamic duo is moving into an uber-exclusive gated community in Bel Air where their neighbors will include Jennnifer Aniston and Joe Francis.  Hear that?  It's the sound of Jen packing up her U-Haul!  Joe, on the other hand, is shopping for a porn fruit basket for the Kimye

According to TMZ, Kim and Kanye recently shelled out $11 million for a 10,000 square foot mansion that they quickly gutted.  Once construction is completed, a 14,000 square foot spanish style estate will stand as a beacon for the ridiculous excess to which these two aspire.  It's the stuff movies are made of, folks…and by movies, I mean sex tapes. 

The home will be modest, of course, with just the necessities…like a bowling alley, a movie theater, and fully functioning hair and make-up salon.  Additionally, the grounds will house a basketball court and an outdoor swimming pool.  For the times that it's too chilly outside for Kim to lounge in a tacky bathing suit, there will be an indoor pool for such occasions.  When Kimye, Jr. arrives he or she will have a nursery wing as well. 

I'm curious, and I'm not being sarcastic (for once)…do these people do any serious charity work?


[Photo Credit: DJDM/]